When I student might be lying?

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by HorseLover, Oct 3, 2013.

  1. HorseLover

    HorseLover Comrade

    Mar 23, 2013
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    Oct 3, 2013

    When a student might be lying?

    What do you do when one student claims another student did something, but that student says he/she didn't? To be honest, it wouldn't surprise me a whole lot of the student is lying, but I can't just accuse him/her of it without knowing, but if they constantly claim "no" then it doesn't help solve the problem of who actually did it. :dizzy: any tips?
  3. live

    live Companion

    Aug 9, 2012
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    Oct 3, 2013

    I never outright ask a student if they did something specific, because that shows them how much or how little I know. When I talk to them, I don't even tell them what it's about at first. If they did something wrong, they already know.

    I want them to assume that I might already know everything, so that they'll consider the fact that it might be in their best interest to come clean. They know better than to lie to me.

    I pull them aside and ask, "Is there something I should know?" If they truly are guilty, then they get that guilty, shifty look. Before they respond I say, "Here's your chance to tell me everything. I know about what happened, but this is your chance to get my help." I don't make it a threatening or confrontational conversation. They'll usually get a little uncomfortable and tiptoe their way around the situation. If it seems like they're making something up, I'll let them know that I'm unsatisfied and have them start over. Eventually, they work their way to the truth if they think you might know something and it'll be better off if they come clean. Most kids this works with, but it could be in part because my students are convinced that I actually do see and hear everything.

    I usually only do this when I really sense they're lying and they did something inappropriate.
  4. queenie

    queenie Groupie

    Feb 13, 2008
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    Oct 4, 2013

    I never say, "Did you hit Johnny?" I say, "WHY did you hit Johnny?" Works 90% of the time!

    When it doesn't work, I say, "Did anybody see Joey hit Johnny?" If I have witnesses, I find out from them (one at a time) what happened. If I don't have witnesses, I get the two kids involved together and try to figure it out. If I can't figure it out (not very often), I tell them that I don't appreciate being lied to and I know that one of them is lying. I offer them one last chance to tell me the truth so that I will know I can trust them in the future. Occasionally even that doesn't work and I have to say something like, "Well, if you feel like a friend is not treating you well by hitting you or lying about being hit, perhaps you should play with someone else today."
  5. MissScrimmage

    MissScrimmage Aficionado

    May 29, 2007
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    Oct 4, 2013

    Great approach! This is something I really struggle with. I had a couple of compulsive liars last year who always found each other and were always upset with one another - both denying everything! :dizzy:

    I have also said to kids, "If you have to think that hard about whether this happened, it means you are thinking of a way to get out."
  6. Zelda~*

    Zelda~* Devotee

    May 18, 2008
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    Oct 4, 2013

    I ask "What did you do to Billy?" or "Why is Billy crying?"

    Sometimes I also ask, "What will I see if I look at the cameras?" This is a great incentive for kids to tell the truth, when they know they're on film.

    On an amusing note I have one student who tells me: "You can tell I'm telling the truth because my eyes aren't glowing red."

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