You guys are the experts in managing children, so I'm asking for opinions and advise. What do you do about a friend who has a child that absolutely grates on your nerves? Specifically, I have a friend, I'll call her Karen here. Karen is a very nice woman of about my age, I think she is a year or two older than me (maybe 51). She is a social worker with a Master's degree and works for mental health with at risk kids, many of whom are in foster care. She's a very compassionate person. Karen has a daughter whom I'll call Annoya. Karen is a single mother and adopted Annoya when she was 8 months old from an orphanage in India. She's very dedicated to her, Annoya is her life, she's is very responsible and doesn't date. She is into her career and her daughter. Annoya is 11, the same age as my younger daughter. Annoya is not a bad kid, she gets good grades, etc. It's just that she is extremely self-centered. Her mother has made her the center of the universe. Karen was new to mothering, infatuated with her daughter, and also she has a very '60's' parenting style. She likes to discuss everything as if they are equals, would never raise her voice, everything is an encounter session with her. She hasn't done a terrible job, but Annoya is, well, annoying. She annoys my daughters big time because she is a self-centered know-it-all. Now Karen has asked me to occasionally babysit this summer. Since I'm a nurse I don't work everyday. I did this last year, but Annoya has a bird phobia and I have alot of chickens, pigeons, ducks and a goose, and she makes a big deal out of it. So I told Karen that I would, but I wasn't going to lock up my chickens. Karen previously had catered to this phobia big time, she is super into listening to feelings, and acknowledging them, and it's my opinion that this feeds some manipulative behavior on the part of Annoya. Karen said that Annoya will just have to get over it. (I was surprised but I notice that Karen has been standing up to her a little bit lately when Annoya gets mouthy with her) My older daughter told me last night that she doesn't want me to babysit Annoya. She's almost 13, and she's a really easy going girl who is tolerant by nature. I don't really want to either, but I like my friend and it's good to help friends out, plus I might want to ask her for help sometime. Also, I don't want my friend to have any inkling that her precious child annoys me. Advise?