Very sad news

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Irishdave, Aug 11, 2008.

  1. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    Aug 12, 2008

    I agree with this 100%. I still have ultrasound pictures of the twins (14 weeks), and of the second pregnancy (8 weeks). I didn't name them, but maybe I should have. It might have made the healing/grieving process easier.
     
  2. bonneb

    bonneb Fanatic

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    Aug 12, 2008

    :love:mmswm - You can still name them, because you are their mother.
     
  3. LoVe 2 TcH

    LoVe 2 TcH Companion

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    Aug 12, 2008

    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers...
     
  4. djmondi

    djmondi Comrade

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    Aug 12, 2008

    I had a miscarriage 5 years ago. I think flowers or something to let her know you are thinking about her would be fine. Most people don't know what to say so they either avoid you or say things like, "it's for the better." Those things DO NOT help. I am 16 weeks now and still scared all the time:(
     
  5. moonbeamsinajar

    moonbeamsinajar Habitué

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    Aug 12, 2008

    Irish Dave, my daughter had a miscarriage on Aug 1st and a D&C on the 6th. I know just how you feel. It would have been my first grandchild. I found a nice site online and ordered a necklace with a forget-me-not flower on it, and the baby's birthstone. I guess I just want her to know that it was not "just a miscarriage" to me, but the passing of a real person, whom we just did not have for very long, but was still loved. The whole thing is very sad.
     
  6. Irishdave

    Irishdave Enthusiast

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    Aug 12, 2008


    Two Songs That I have played and cried to all day are
    "Let There Be Peace On Earth" and "Butterfly Kisses"
    I guess I needed to let out some emotion
    the Dog even knew I was upset she would not leave my side all day a little lick a nuzzle made it alright.

    "Let There Be Peace On Earth"
    Let there be peace on earth
    and let it begin with me
    Let There Be Peace on Earth
    The peace that was meant to be

    With God as our Father
    Brothers all are we
    Let me walk with my brother
    In perfect harmony.

    Let peace begin with me
    Let this be the moment now.

    With ev'ry step I take
    Let this be my solemn vow
    To take each moment and live
    Each moment in peace eternally
    Let there be peace on earth
    and let it begin with me

    Bob Carlisle Butterfly Kisses

    There's two things I know for sure
    She was sent here from heaven
    And she's daddy's little girl
    As I drop to my knees by her bed at night
    She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes
    And I thank God for all of the joy in my life
    Oh but most of all

    For butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer
    Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair
    Walk beside the pony daddy it's my first ride
    I know the cake looks funny daddy but I sure tried

    Oh with all that I've done wrong
    I must have done something right
    To deserve a hug every mornin'
    And butterfly kisses at night

    Sweet 16 today
    She's lookin' like her mama a little more every day
    One part woman the other part girl
    To perfume and make up from ribbons and curls
    Trying her wings out in a great big world
    But I remember

    Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer
    Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair
    You know how much I love you daddy
    But if you don't mind
    I'm only gonna kiss you on the check this time

    Oh with all that I've done wrong
    I must have done something right
    To deserve her love every mornin'
    And butterfly kisses at night

    All the precious time
    Like the wind the years go by
    Precious butterfly
    Spread your wings and fly

    She'll change her name today
    She'll make a promise and I'll give her aways
    Standing in the bride room just staring at her
    She asked me what I'm thinkin'
    And I said I'm not sure
    I just feel like I'm loosin' my baby girl
    And she leaned over

    Gave me butterfly kisses with her mama there
    Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair
    Walk me down the isle daddy
    It's just about time
    Does my wedding gown look pretty daddy?
    Daddy's don't cry

    Oh with all that I've done wrong
    I must have done something right
    To deserve her love every mornin'
    And butterfly kisses

    I couldn't ask God for more than this is what love is
    I know I've got to let her go but I'll always remember
    Every hug in the mornin' and butterfly kisses​

     
  7. Irishdave

    Irishdave Enthusiast

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    Aug 12, 2008

    What is the site????????????
     
  8. Ghost

    Ghost Habitué

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    Aug 12, 2008

    Oh Dave! I am sooooo sorry! Don't feel bad for thinking in terms of "I" Your dreams have been crushed too and you are in mourning of what might have been.

    I have had 2 miscarraiges and a stillbirth. It will help to name and remember the baby. I would also advise your DIL to check into Resolve Through Sharing, a wonderful support group that is usually found through a hospital. It helped me a lot. Here is another link to some support in NC. http://www.nationalshareoffice.com/resources_share_groups.shtml

    Take care of yourself....you can't help them if you get sick from grieving. :hugs:
     
  9. msmath

    msmath Rookie

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    Aug 12, 2008

    ((((HUGS)))) I was just thinking how I should have a 3 year old and a 2 year old right now. It's crazy, and it def still hurts. Big hugs for anyone who lost their babies. I didn't get an ultrasound, but I had an idea of what I was going to name them, so I picked names and consider them my Angel babies names...Isabella and Frankie. I also made a scrapbook. I put all my diary entries that I had written while I was pregnant, and poems, quotes..cards people gave me. One of my friends gave me this precious moments, with two angels (boy and a girl) and it was so beautiful and thoughtful.

    IrishDave again I am so sorry. ((((HUGS))) and good thoughts.
     
  10. Freebird

    Freebird Rookie

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    Aug 12, 2008

    I'm very sorry for your loss. :(
     
  11. msmath

    msmath Rookie

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    Aug 12, 2008

    http://www.myforeverchild.com/

    This site has bracelets and other things for women who have
    Angel babies. I should get something. One of my friends made or got me earrings with blue and pink beads and a butterfly.
    Anyway, you could check it out Dave or anyone else.
     
  12. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    Aug 12, 2008

    Dave,
    I'm so sorry. Sending a huge hug to you and lots of prayers for your son, DIL and the rest of your family.

    Jaime
     
  13. Irishdave

    Irishdave Enthusiast

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    Aug 12, 2008

  14. alilisa

    alilisa Habitué

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    Aug 12, 2008

    I'm so sorry Dave!! Your family is in my thoughts!!
     
  15. hescollin

    hescollin Fanatic

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    Aug 12, 2008

    With Sympathy. Hugs to you and prayer to Heaven for you and your family
     
  16. Kangaroo22

    Kangaroo22 Virtuoso

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    Aug 12, 2008

    I'm sorry Dave, your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
     
  17. teacherintexas

    teacherintexas Maven

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  18. Master Pre-K

    Master Pre-K Virtuoso

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    Aug 13, 2008


    So sorry Dave...

    You can do all of the above..

    and try Psalms 23...

    "Yea, though I walk through the valley in the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for thou art with me, thy rod and thy staff comfort me."
     
  19. Hoot Owl

    Hoot Owl Aficionado

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    Aug 13, 2008

    I know you must be heart broken, I'm so, so sorry. I remember you posting the pregnancy annoucement.

    Send the DIL flowers now along with a hand written note and send some again on the date the baby would have been born, that will be a hard day for her too.

    I think losing a child is one of the hardest and saddest things in the whole world. Again, I'm so, so sorry.

    I've been there. I know. Time will heal, you'll never forget, but encourage them to try, try again. We don't have enough pretty, smart people making babies!!!
     
  20. Lindsay.Lou

    Lindsay.Lou Companion

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    Aug 13, 2008

    I'm so sorry. Your son & dil are very very very lucky to have such a loving and caring father (& fil) as you.
     
  21. corps2005

    corps2005 Cohort

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    Aug 13, 2008

    Dave, I'm very sorry for your family's loss. There's really nothing more I can say that will help any, but that I"ll keep your family and you in my thoughts. :hugs:
     
  22. Rabbitt

    Rabbitt Connoisseur

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    Aug 14, 2008

    I am sooo sorry this has happened to your family.
    I am glad to hear you sticking with your faith.
    Somehow remembering "Thy will be done" gets me through tough times.
    I often want it to be "My will be done" but that's not how it works.

    Hugs...
     

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