Trying to get pregnant while teaching - help!

Discussion in 'General Education' started by yorkieborkie, Feb 26, 2013.

  1. yorkieborkie

    yorkieborkie New Member

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    Feb 26, 2013

    I am really in need of support today - I think I've reached my breaking point. I desperately want to ask my mom or my friends for advice and support....but my husband wants to keep our babymaking plans secret and has asked me not to talk about it. So I'm stuck - does anyone have any words of wisdom for me?

    We started trying in September, hoping for a summer baby - I teach at a small preschool with only one other classroom. My plan was to leave my job after the school year is over and stay home with the baby until I was ready to get back to work in a year or so. All of my close friends have gotten pregnant immediately after trying, so I (wrongly) assumed we could too. Now, 6 months later we are still trying and are way past a summer due date.

    I am desperate to leave my job after this year and am finding teaching preschoolers incredibly stressful - not good for trying to conceive! This is my third year there and I cannot imagine having to return again in the fall for ANOTHER year but I feel I have no option because I could get pregnant any month and it seems irresponsible to look for a new job while actively trying to get pregnant. I have to give my school notice by April if I am not returning in the fall but that will be too early for me to apply for other non-teaching jobs that won't interview/hire until a month or so before start date (which would be July). If I decide to leave I won't have any job lined up right away because of the timing and that leaves me running the risk of being without a paycheck until I find a new position. Not good when you're trying to save money for a baby!

    I feel stuck and frustrated. I am hating my job but feel I can't leave until I have the baby because it is the most financially secure thing to do. Should I say screw it and put in my leave, hoping to find a non-teaching job immediately and not worry about whether or not I get pregnant soon after starting a new position? Or stick it out and pray I get pregnant soon, knowing I can leave mid-year if my due date is sometime next year?
     
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  3. Peregrin5

    Peregrin5 Maven

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    Feb 26, 2013

    I have a feeling most schools are pretty understanding when it comes to teachers getting pregnant. It seems to have been a common occurrence since the advent of female school teachers.

    I don't see why you shouldn't try to get a job, and then simply allow the school to know well in advance that you will be leaving because of pregnancy. (I mean the thing takes 9 months to bake in the oven, it should be no sweat to let them know at least 4-6 months beforehand that you will be needing a replacement.)

    The kids will have had a teacher for most of the year, and some job seeker will be very happy mid-year to take your position for you because it will possibly mean permanent employment for them if they do well.

    I say stick it out and keep trying.
     
  4. monsieurteacher

    monsieurteacher Aficionado

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    Feb 26, 2013

    Well my first reaction is to stop trying to get pregnant while teaching... try it later in the evening... after hours. You could get in a lot of trouble trying to get pregnant while teaching.

    But seriously, we've also been trying, and I say there's no reason not to.
     
  5. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Feb 26, 2013

    :lol:
     
  6. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    Feb 26, 2013


    So glad I wasn't the only one.
     
  7. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Feb 26, 2013

    I thought the same thing!
     
  8. MrsLilHen

    MrsLilHen Comrade

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    Feb 26, 2013

    I was going to say the same. Much less stressful to try later in the evening...
     
  9. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    Feb 26, 2013

    If you are miserable in your job, look for a new one. You can't plan based on "what if". You might get pregnant this month, or it could take years.
     
  10. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    Y'all are cracking me up!
     
  11. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Feb 27, 2013

  12. bobby

    bobby Rookie

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    Feb 27, 2013

    It took us 2 years to conceive. If you don't like this job, try to find one that you will like. As you mentioned, being stressed is no good while ttc! Like a pp said, being pregnant takes 9 months, and most places are very accommodating.

    I know you're really stressed right now. I totally understand. Good luck as you ttc!:hugs:
     
  13. MATgrad

    MATgrad Groupie

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    Feb 27, 2013

    I'm at home on maternity leave right now and let me tell you it has been eye-opening. The lesson learned has been "take care of you first because in reality schools don't care about you." I would have a talk though with your doctor if you are seriously concerned about your fertility though.
     
  14. Rox

    Rox Cohort

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    Feb 27, 2013

    I can certainly feel your pain... It took my husband and I five years to conceive, and with IVF, we were blessed with boy/girl twins and they are 15 months old now.

    If you are over 35, you can see your doctor now for a referral to a reproductive endocrinologist (not an ob/gyn). If not, you generally have to wait until you have been trying for a year. If you haven't already, read the book "Taking Charge of your Fertility." There's also a great infertility message board at thebump.com.

    :hugs:
     

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