They made me cry!

Discussion in 'Middle School / Junior High' started by Budaka, Feb 19, 2008.

  1. Budaka

    Budaka Cohort

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Okay, my seventh graders finally made me cry. Or rather their parents and them.
    I almost hit a deer on the way to work (no cars but me for miles and it runs out if front of me?) So I walk in the door at exactly 8:00 and like five people tell me that they are paging me in the office. So I walk in the office and sure enough there is a parent of a seventh grader, who preceded to yell at me because of her child's grade. I deal with her and there are three students waiting for me in my classroom to fuss about their grades. And it is not because they care about failing English it is because they may be ineligible for sports! And they have managed to convince their parents that I "lose" their papers (I do not!). Funny that I don't lose papers from any of my other classes. I couldn't take it anymore! I sent them out. Darn if I was going to cry in front of THEM. Then I hid out in another classroom and called the principal to watch my first period class. He later told me to stop taking so much ownership of their problems. I cant help but to take it personally. I am a veteran teacher. I shouldn't be having these problems. :(
     
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  3. Budaka

    Budaka Cohort

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    Feb 19, 2008

    And I hate being such a girly girl. I wish I were a guy and I could swear or throw something.
     
  4. ~mrs.m~

    ~mrs.m~ Comrade

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    Feb 19, 2008

    I'm sorry you had such a rough day. Hope tomorrow is a lot better!
     
  5. Terrence

    Terrence Comrade

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    Feb 19, 2008

    I can completely empathize with you. Last year, I had two parents at the same time come in and completely eviscerate me over their child's grades. They had a comeback to everything I said. I showed them half completed work to verify their child's grades, but that wasn't good enough. To make matters worse, I was holding after school detention at the time, so they did it infront of my students! Of course it didn't stop there, one of the messed-up-in-the-head students decided they were going to try and get me fired, she he began telling the parents that I never teach, that I sit at my desk and eat all day and I make them teach themselves! When I heard that come out of his mouth, I was in complete shock. So, now I was trying to defend myself times three! Last year was my first year as a teacher, and these parents were taking notes of what the kid said, etc. I was both scared and pissed off. One of the parents made a complaint to the district (which I won). That day ruined an entire year of teaching. I was so upset I was literally in tears. Just don't let this one bad day count for all of your awesome moments in teaching. Take it easy, have a good cry, and get back up on your feet.
     
  6. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    Feb 19, 2008

    :D Do it anyway (just be sure that no-one hears you!) Sometimes a good "curse" makes you feel better. :whistle: I also have some stress balls in my classroom, in theory for the kids, but I've used them myself on moe than one occasion.

    On a more serious note...sorry to hear about your bad day. How's your car after the run-in with the deer? Hope tomorrow is a better one.
     
  7. traeh

    traeh Companion

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Budaka-

    I am really sorry to hear you had such a bad day. Who is to blame you for crying after such an intense (and extremely frustrating) start of the school day. I mean, regardless of whether you are a veteran teacher or not, you aren't a machine. Obviously, it's going to get to you to have so many people fussing, yelling, and making up stories to make themselves appear superior. Sounds like an overwhelming morning... and you had every right to let it out. Look at the bright side.. you handled yourself well! And at least you didn't tear up in front of the kids : )

    I must say kudos to you for teaching so many preps AND dealing with this bs that goes along with the job, so effectively. You're an inspiration! (not to sound corny--but it's true--you are always so insightful and I always love your advice, and you're clearly a good teacher; don't let em bring you down)
     
  8. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Budaka, I'm sorry that you had a rough day. I have had parents that have made me cry. I had to have someone watch my class while I had a good cry. I hope tomorrow is a much better day! :hugs:
     
  9. SwOcean Gal

    SwOcean Gal Devotee

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Sometimes just letting it all out and having a big cry goes a long way. Sending Best wishes, happy thoughts, and lots of hugs your way! :hugs:
     
  10. Ms.Jasztal

    Ms.Jasztal Maven

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    Feb 19, 2008

    My students are in the pre-teen stage and will grow to fill the spot of these lovely seventh graders. I am sorry this had to happen to you and that parents believe the stories their children tell. Naturally, parents should support their kids..... but..... not believe a lie about how you teach in their minds and that you lose their papers. To an extent, I can relate. My students may be younger, but fourth graders believe similar thoughts at times.
     
  11. Budaka

    Budaka Cohort

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Thanks for all the wonderful comments, especially traeh. The cool thing is that when I came back into my class (Spanish) the students knew that I was upset and they were so good and sweet. Some of them have seventh grade brothers and sisters so I bet there was some talking going on at home! Everyone in the hall heard me tell the seventh graders to get out of my room! I am proud that I managed to get them out before I said anything that I would regret!:lol:

    My problem is that the vast majority of my students react very well to my teaching style. We always work bell to bell, do lots of different activities, and the students learn a lot. But my problem is that once in a while a class comes along that takes advantage of me. They look at me with their eyes (think of the cat in Shrek) and I am too much of a softie.
    My Spanish students rarely fail because they love Spanish and they want to do well. Even students who aren't getting good grades love to be in my class. But with this English class it is different (although my 8th grade English is great). They don't care about learning. Their goal is to socialize as much as possible and do as little work as possible (which may be typical of their age). They don't want to play games or to activities or work in groups. They want me to give them a worksheet and hopefully the answers and not to have to think too much. I keep reminding myself discipline before instruction. I need to tap into my inner meanness and not look at their eyes!
     
  12. MrL

    MrL Companion

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    Feb 19, 2008

    I know plenty of girls who could give you lessons.
     
  13. Budaka

    Budaka Cohort

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    Feb 19, 2008

    I bet that is true! But on a side note, I have learned that if I act that way I am either labeled as a ***ch or that I am just being "moody". Guys can get away with it a lot more I think. Well, that is a whole other thread.
     
  14. Master Pre-K

    Master Pre-K Virtuoso

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    Feb 19, 2008

    and you know, if we did, people would understand! :mad:

    that stinks!
     
  15. Master Pre-K

    Master Pre-K Virtuoso

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    Feb 19, 2008

    well you know...

    we gotta work like a dog
    think like a man
    and act like a woman


    unless, of course..we are dealing with our cars...then you just gotta act like your are a bit ticked off, from the minute you walk in the door! "I need this fixed, and I need it done right, got me?!"

    that is the only thing that works.

    "uh, I don't know what this rrh rrh sound is in my car, can you look at it please.."

    THAT will not work.

    it will get you a $200 bill for a set of $30 spark plugs!

    "Oh yeah Dearie...we found your problem, but it's a bit complicated for a nice girl like you, but don't worry, my guys got it fixed nice for ya!"
     
  16. Master Pre-K

    Master Pre-K Virtuoso

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    Feb 19, 2008

    yeah, and I learned if I stand up for myself, I am a troublemaker! :confused:
     
  17. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Sorry you had such a horrible day. I think we have all broken down once or twice.

    Hey at least you didnt' fall down your mom's stairs today and bruise your behind!
     
  18. daysy_may

    daysy_may Groupie

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    Feb 19, 2008

    Sorry today was so rough for you! Here's hoping for a better tomorrow!
     
  19. Master Pre-K

    Master Pre-K Virtuoso

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    Feb 20, 2008

    oh no! did you??? are you okay?

    you know, how come bandaids never stay on your behind?
     
  20. eduk8r

    eduk8r Enthusiast

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    Feb 21, 2008

    If you're not apologizing or defensive about it, they won't call you a b. Just be calm and firm. If they still act like that, so what. At some point a few years ago I started asking myself, gee, I don't try to make people do what I want, why do people do that to me? I got to the point in my life where I just don't care if people act like that to me when they don't get their way. Oh well, too bad, I want my way too but I don't call people names for not doing it. :p I think that's just another form of manipulation, just a tactic, trying to make you feel like you're wrong because you didn't do what they wanted.
     
  21. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    Feb 21, 2008

    7th graders are sometimes just plain evil. What you described sounds like totally normal 7th graders to me. I love my 7's. They're a challenge and I get no end of amusemnt out of their antics. On the other hand, they call me sarge, since I don't put up with any cr@p. I've found that most of the time I just have to go with the flow with them and get them back around to working. Sometimes that's easier than others, but I wouldn't trade 7th grade for anything.
     
  22. ChanseyWMU

    ChanseyWMU New Member

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    Dec 9, 2008

    "she he began telling the parents that I never teach, that I sit at my desk and eat all day and I make them teach themselves! When I heard that come out of his mouth, I was in complete shock"

    I hate when other adults give comments like this from seventh graders credibility.
     
  23. Sheba

    Sheba Companion

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    Dec 10, 2008

    It's hard to say - I think that with that age *certain* women come across as potentially easy to take advantage of. Actually I think that grade 8s are worse for collectively deciding to take advantage of a teacher. There's a certain trick to being strict while still keeping a smile on your face that I still haven't quite mastered after more than four years of teaching middle school kids, but I'm getting better at it.

    To say the least if kids are being such little turds (and making up demonstrable lies) it should be the teacher making them cry, not the other way around. I just simply won't let mine drive me to that point, though I have made a few grade 7s cry - not this year, though; my grade 7s this year have been awesome. A couple of weeks ago I yelled at one of my grade 7 classes for the first time this year. What an amazing effect it has when you almost never use it.

    I have a few female co-workers who just have an incredible ability to emit a take-no-crap persona that has an amazing effect on kids that age. In their case I think consistency and attention to detail is really the key. While male teachers may have a tendency to let things slide once in a while their kids know they're in for 45 minutes of paying attention or they can expect a very unpleasant time, so they snap into attentive mode and stay there. While I may have issues with a few of their pedagogical methods I can't say they're scoring much less than 100% on making the most effective use of their methods.
     

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