I have a student who is delayed. He is 3, and not yet potty training. At home parents have been working on it, and I really encourage it at school. He is in daycare for most of the day and they are working on it as well. Sometimes he wears underwear, but other times the mom sends him in a pull-up. He has only had an accident at school once (pooped) and has never had an accident at daycare. Today, he even told me he needed to use the bathroom when asked. He goes willinging and seems to enjoy the bathroom. The problem I am having is that mom has been switching between underwear and pull-ups. Some days he has underwear and others pull-ups. When he wears the pull-ups, he doesnt want to use the bathroom and will not go willingling. When he is wearing underwear, he goes in the bathroom. After 2 weeks of wearing underwear, he came today in pull-ups. I have extra never used underwear in case of emergencies and I switched him into the underwear. He kept tugging at the pull-up and was not happy about having to go use the bathroom. Why do I feel like I am at war with the parents on potty training? I want their child to succeed, not keep regressing. Anyone have suggestions on how I can approach this parent or should I leave the potty training issue to myself? I am a public early childhood classroom.
You don't say whether you've spoken with the mom. Did she have a reason for the underpants/pull up change?
I would just let the mom know what you are seeing. He will willing use the restroom when he has on underwear. When he is wearing a pull-up, he will not use the restroom willingly and he seems uncomfortable. It could just be that they ran out of clean underwear with accidents at night....
We were pretty sure that Brian would be wearing a pullup to the prom. And after one incident (where his underwear was accidentally flushed down the toilet and he was pretty sure that he would be next) it became a real issue. He'll be ready when he's ready. The underwear/pullup thing may be a function of what he's ready for on that particular morning. By the time he gets to school his mood may very well have changed.
First, thanks Alice. We're potty training right now and people keep saying "He won't go to college in a diaper!" Are you sure? Really, really sure? Your story about your son made me laugh at 5:22am, which is welcome. Second, I agree withe the quote above. My thought on reading this was that maybe the mother is giving him options in the morning. And we all know that toddlers say they want one thing and five minutes later it's something else. Perhaps she thinks it's a positive thing to offer him some control over his trajectory.
Before they enroll in my classroom, the parents are told that we don't do pull-ups in our classroom. Every August we have 3 or 4 kids who come to us not being potty trained. After about a month they are all potty trained. Pull-ups are counter productive.
:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::thumb::clap::clap::clap::clap: I loved that image!!!!! But I agree, we have a lot of 3's that aren't potty trained. Well, I should say we have HAD many 3's that aren't potty trained. It isn't all in one year. Tell mom what is going on and express your, and the child's, frustrations. Then request several pairs of underwear and tell her that he will be changing into the underwear in the classroom since that works better for him here. This will pass. It is unlikely he will "go to prom" in a pull up.
