The "Do you drink" question..

Discussion in 'General Education' started by Historyteaching, Nov 10, 2008.

  1. Historyteaching

    Historyteaching Cohort

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    Nov 10, 2008

    Today one of my sophomore classes asked me if I drank. I said "Yes I have during the summer. If I never again it wouldn't bother me. I don't promote for you nor condone it."

    A girl goes, my mom lets me drink with her. I replied. "What your parents let you do/not do is their business. I won't discuss that. She is your mom."

    They asked me what I liked but I said basically end of this talk let's finish up the lesson.

    Am I okay in saying this? What do ya'll think? :help::thanks:
     
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  3. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    Honestly, I wouldn't have answered that question. What you do on your personal time is NONE of their business. I would have also been concerned about the girl who said her mom lets her drink with her. This is quite a fine line to walk with adolescent students.
     
  4. ELA 11 12

    ELA 11 12 Companion

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    Nov 10, 2008

    Because I teach high school, I get that questions several times each year.

    My reply is, "Yes, because I am over 21 and I can do it legally."

    You answered your "My mom let's me..." comment perfectly.
     
  5. Historyteaching

    Historyteaching Cohort

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    I didn't truly mind telling them..I just didn't want to get into a big discussion about drinking and have the cameras hear me and think I talk about alcohol and drugs in my class. They have asked me if i smoke or ever did drugs..and I do neither..they don't believe me..shrugs. I balked at hearing the girl say that..she's a good student. I don't want to open a can of worms if there isn't any. If something comes up and it affects the girl where she gets hurt or comes to school in trouble then i'd take it to a counselor. The girl could also be stretching the truth. That's the mom's business. Some things I will state my opinion on when it has to do with parents. but other things, I mind my own business. I didn't think it would be bad to say yes I have had a drink in my time..I did say as well, yes but i was at least 23 before. They didn't believe me either, they think I drink on the weekends..I don't lol..I've not had anything since I was on vacation and if I never do again I truly don't care. Most of these kids don't share this stuff with parents. I just don't want anything to look bad on me.
     
  6. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    I understand that you don't mind if they know you legally drink. But, I think with adolescents, this topic can get sticky. That is why I suggested just not humoring them with an answer. I also agree that not making a big deal about that girls comment was appropriate. But, it would definitely have my ears perked up.
     
  7. scienceteach82

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    Nov 10, 2008

    my parents let me have wine from time to time with them at dinner...was never a big concern...and I never abused it.
     
  8. Historyteaching

    Historyteaching Cohort

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    Oh, I agree that it can. I was very cautious of how I answered. I looked at the one that asked at first and contemplated. But, I figured that I wasn't going to go into how to mix drinks or what is the best beer to buy, so I figured if I just answered it and went on then it would satisfy them. Which it seemed to do...I hope
     
  9. Sheba

    Sheba Companion

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    I've taught in three cultures that had quite different attitudes towards drinking. It's all culturally relative. In one culture you won't find any open liquor at a university department and in another elementary school teachers get drunk at school after classes. I don't see the point in being dishonest with or afraid to talk to students about what ordinary adults do.
     
  10. Historyteaching

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    I think I ..felt better. . about answering because I do teach high school. If it had been middle or lower I'd not done it and just said something else.
     
  11. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    Nov 10, 2008

    I DO teach middle school and the question does come up with an alarming frequency. I usually answer the question with something to the effect that my personal life is not listed in the standards of the course, so we won't be discussing it. I have, however, overridden my own rule when the situation warrented a discussion on responsible drinking (like when a former student was pronounced brain dead after a 3 day bender that caused extreme alcohol posioning.).
     
  12. Historyteaching

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    I bet it does come up alot..scary that it would. I don't blame you for doing a responsible drinking discussion. Things like that is a perfect learning tool...unfortunately, because it 'hits home' for some students alot more than just generally talking about it.

    I've not had it asked to me this directly before and just didn't want it to backfire in my face.
     
  13. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Nov 10, 2008

    Just because a question is asked doesn't mean you have to answer it...
     
  14. sue35

    sue35 Habitué

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    I don't answer any questions about my personal life. I will offer up information but will not answer anything. I guess it is a control issue. But I don't think you did anything wrong. I teach 5th so it there would be much more of a chance the truth could get stretched.
     
  15. Historyteaching

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    very true czacza, I thought if I answered and got it over with they'd drop it and let it go..which they did. Sort of nip it early on. Please don't mistake it to mean I answer all questions. I never did answer or do answer anything about my political or religious views nor do I answer, yet to be asked, about anything extremely personal-beyond the typical married/kids questions I get alot on the first few days of school. I just wanted to see how ya'll would handle it and if anyone thought I was way out of line. I don't think I was-my mom, a retired elem. teacher, didn't think much-she just told me to watch when referring to how parents handle their own kids (which I hope I did). I didn't hear any of the other students saying Ms A-so and so said...because usually things that they think is big will get back to you when the next class of 10ths come in the door later that day.
     
  16. Doug_HSTeach_07

    Doug_HSTeach_07 Comrade

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    Nov 10, 2008

    Hey fellow history teacher, you answered the questions perfectly. Don't sweat it.
     
  17. Historyteaching

    Historyteaching Cohort

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    Heh..thanks..nothing was mentioned at all about it. I think alot of this..sweating..comes from I'm a 2nd year and not fully confident in my total abilities-along with knowing everyone gets a pink slip this year (and then told if its 'real' or not) and being told that yes I have enthusiasm and yes I want to keep you here..but your class is not effective (this was a month ago or so) by my P...he's been in a couple more times yet not said anything more to me yet...has me a little up in arms. I want to ask him how to be more effective, but not sure if I should. He's a good P and if he wasn't gonna keep me, I'll know way before the May 15th deadline. But I'd really like to get it out of the way now LOL. I just want to teach the kids and do a good job. Teaching is my passion..I love it..the kids drive me insane and I want to scream..but I love it. I want to earn my tenure in 3 years and stay at this school until I choose to leave. I just want to do things right and be effective...sighs....
     
  18. Missy99

    Missy99 Connoisseur

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    Nov 11, 2008

    The best response to what I call "none-of-your-business" questions is this one:

    "Why do you ask?"

    Whenever I have used that line people usually say "Never mind" or walk away embarrassed (as they should be).

    A teacher shouldn't answer personal questions.
     
  19. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

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    Nov 11, 2008

    In sixth grade, we have DARE, so it comes up with me. I have the unique situation of being close friends with one of my student's parents, and we have all gone camping together in the summer. So she has seen me drink before-in a controlled setting, responsibly, without driving, etc. I was nervous about it, but I'm sorry-I have a life too, and what I choose to do in my off time is my own business. If I am asked, I simply explain that I choose to live my life within the boundaries of the law and good sense, and it is my own business. It's tough, but I'm not ashamed of it. If I was, I wouldn't do it.
     
  20. Rockguykev

    Rockguykev Connoisseur

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    Nov 12, 2008

    I've found this question is really easy to answer if you don't drink.
     
  21. stephenpe

    stephenpe Connoisseur

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    Nov 13, 2008

    This is why I love teaching the little guys 5-11.
    But it still gives you a reason to drink sometimes;)
     
  22. monsieurteacher

    monsieurteacher Aficionado

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    I don't see any problem with how you answered the question. I think that we all have different levels to which we would go in sharing our personal lives, and that to say that the OP should not have answered the question is an unfair assessment. In the grand scheme of things, answering a question about your personal life that a) you are comfortable discussing and b) does not take you too far off topic is perfectly acceptable.
     

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