THAT IS IT!!!!I QUIT!!!!

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by NYTONJ, Sep 28, 2011.

  1. NYTONJ

    NYTONJ Rookie

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    Sep 28, 2011

    I can not stand it anymore!! I was just totally slapped in the face by my unprofessional obnoxious, disorganized, FAKE boss! This year I was "blessed" to find a job, after years and years of searching. I was very excited at the beginning of the year. Everything was falling into place. Even though the school was not in the most desirable town, or the most desirable building, with super long hours and an extended school year I was trying to be optimistic. I just knew that this would be it for me, I had found my home....

    It all started to unravel over the summer. I had not received my schedule, a class list, a list of things that would be in the classroom (I couldn't even see the room), everything was basically a mystery! I tried to over look all of this, including the welcome back letter from the lovely principal that was neither spellchecked nor did it look like anyone had even read over it to make sure it looked half-way decent before it went out. I was still optimistic the first few days of pd- even though once again we had no agendas or any clue what time we were supposed to be in, what time we could leave, or what we would be doing each day!! (p.s. I didn't receive my schedule until the day before the first day of school!!)

    The next thing I know the kids are there, I hear from other teachers who have worked with these kids that I have EVERY behavior problem in the lot!! While the other teacher in my grade has NONE!! HMMMM sounds peculiar, but I took it as a compliment that they had faith that I could handle this (with NO HELP whatsoever!).

    Now four weeks into the school year I am getting reprimanded for how "harsh" my tone is with the class and how much transition time there is!!! What the @#*&!! I give the students a direction and I have to say it six times before they even begin to follow the direction but it is my fault that they take FOREVER to transition???!!!
    So now I have to go "observe" what a GREAT #$&*ING job the other teacher is doing(who is a first year teach, with NO behavior problems in her class)?!!!

    I want to quit so bad....I am trying the best I can but apparently I am just not a good enough teacher. I feel like I just can not handle failing AGAIN!!! I am really about to lose it here!!!

    I am sorry if this is long and makes no sense. I just can't talk to anyone at home because they don't get it and I feel like such a LOSER!!!

    I don't know what other career I could possibly work in but I can't keep failing in this one....its just tooo hard to keep failing!:help::confused:
     
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  3. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    Sep 28, 2011

    First of all, first year teaching is stressful. There is a huge learning curve and many hours are spent getting on your feet. You are not the first year teacher to have gone through this.

    My first year, I didn't get the updated curriculum until a week after school started and I didn't get the materials until six weeks into it. Did it make it harder? Sure it did. Was it the end of the world? No. Also many people get their schedules changed late. In fact, I was supposed to start in 5th but ended up in kindergarten. P's have to make changes. Sometimes those changes can even occur after school starts. It is not as likely but it has happened.

    Are you the first new teacher with all the behavior problems? No. That happens too. Sometimes though what we do, in our inexperience, can also affect the magnitude of those behavior problems.

    One thing that really stood out to me is that your boss made a criticism of your classroom management and you flipped out and considered your boss unprofessional. I hate to break it to you, but that's your boss' job and it is yours to take that critique and work on it. It might make you feel better if you understand that ALL teachers at some point receive some kind of feedback and areas we need to improve. It stands to reason a new teacher will get even more. In fact, in our school we are under a 2 year closer watch. Instead of getting angry at your boss, it might be much more productive to think about how you can improve. Let's face it, even with behavior issues, if you are having to repeat yourself 6 times, that says you have work to do and what you are doing isn't working. There are a lot of techniques that we can share with you if you share with us and let us help. But I agree with you. You aren't going to last long if you can't handle criticism in this business and especially if you aren't willing to reflect and consider that there might be something you need to work on. The tricky part is not all criticism will be worth its salt, but all should cause you to pause, reflect and think whether it is something you need to work on or fix. If your boss is telling you that it is something you need to work on, then you need to work on it. A more productive approach might be to ask for advice.
     
  4. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Sep 28, 2011

    I agree, absolutely, with everything in the previous post.

    Plus, you mention that you "keep" failing. But as I read your post, you've been teaching for 3 weeks-- hardly enough time to consider yourself a failure.

    Cut is right, of course. If you're repeating yourself 6 times, then your principal or AP is absolutely right in suggesting you work on your classroom management. (And trust me, there's nothing "fake" about having a boss.) I'm sorry you have a rough group of kids. But you have to have known going in that some classes were going to be like that, didn't you?? And that some kids behave differently for one teacher than another.

    Observing another teacher is NEVER a bad idea; there's always so much we can learn. But you need to be open to the possiblity first.

    I've been teaching for 25 years and know there's a lot I can still learn. Is it possible that, after 3 weeks of teaching, the same could be true for you?
     
  5. KateL

    KateL Habitué

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    Sep 28, 2011

    This sounds a bit like culture shock to me. At first, you were so excited and you built everything up in your mind that you had "found your home". Then you found out what the reality is, and you crashed lower than you would have otherwise. I think you need to realign your expectations. No, this job won't be perfect. Maybe it won't even be anywhere close to perfect. But it is do-able. It will just take some hard work to get there, especially with the group of students you have.
     
  6. jen12

    jen12 Devotee

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    Sep 28, 2011

    I'm sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. Sticking the new teacher with the behavior problems seems to be a time-honored tradition. It makes no sense, but it seems like it always ends up that way.

    One thing I've found that works with transitions that take a long time is to tell them they've got until you count to ten to put one book away and take the next one out. Do it slowly....take maybe 30seconds to count to 10. Believe me, it hurries them along.

    Maybe you could look at observing another teacher as a positive thing. Perhaps you can pick up some ideas. It sounds like you don't have any type of mentor teacher and you're in the fire alone--although having you watch another first year teacher seems a bit odd, but maybe she's had some type of related expereince you just don't know about.

    And try to separate yourself from the disorganization you walked into. It's your classroom. You can work to fix it starting right now.
     
  7. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Sep 28, 2011

    Agree with all the above posters.

    You need to reevaluate your classroom management plan.

    I've taught in VERY difficult schools. I taught at a low SES school where gang life/prison life was the norm for these families. When I FIRST took over a class after they've been in session for 2 weeks, they were a MESS. Even the Principal didn't want to be in that room for longer than 2 minutes. I came in on Monday, and they were whipped into shape by the end of the week.. heck, after that day there were pretty much aware of my standards.

    It's all about being firm, consistent, and caring.
     
  8. Croissant

    Croissant Comrade

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    Sep 28, 2011

    I don't think the original poster is a first year teacher. The person she was told to observe is a first year teacher....
     
  9. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    I could certainly be wrong, but this is what I based my response on.
     
  10. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    Sep 28, 2011

    Sorry this year is not off to a good start. What are your consequences for not following directions the first time you give them? How long is it taking the students to transition?
     
  11. webmistress

    webmistress Devotee

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    Sep 28, 2011

    It's not always the teacher's fault.

    Teachers continue to let one teacher take all the behavioral problems and just accept this. There is no sense of community. No one teacher should be burdened with all the behavioral problems and then chastised when her methods are not producing magic. The thing that gets me is the higher ups never put responsibility on the students or parents. It is always the tone of the teacher must do this and that and then students will magically fall in line. I don't buy it.

    I would certainly be glad to adhere to any bosses commands if they would be collaborative and have realistic expectations of me and also place some responsibility on students, parents, and the school community.

    If the principal were a great leader, IMO, he would stack the behavioral problems more efficiently so that one person is not overwhelmed and stretched too thin.

    That being said, I think the problems you face are so common in the field, I certainly know that regular classroom teaching is something I have run far away from because the unnecessary stress from unrealistic expectations is not worth being miserable over. You may want to consider some non classroom positions so you can have a peace of mind. Good luck
     
  12. NYTONJ

    NYTONJ Rookie

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    First- I am not really a new teacher, I have had maternity leave positions before and have had a much easier time, I think this is what is most frustrating. I was a pre-k teacher for years with my own classroom and have never felt this frustrated.

    Second- I was not calling my boss unprofessional for criticizing me. I was calling her unprofessional because she is. I work with her everyday, I see it everyday. I just didn't feel like listing all the things that I feel are unprofessional on a post that was an emotional rant.

    I know that I will be criticized at work, and that it is a good thing. I just think she could have done it in a way that didn't make me feel like an idiot. I actually went to her for some help with this problem a week ago and got nothing, this was after turning to our spec. ed. teacher for help and getting nothing from there either.

    Thank you to those of you who saw this post for what it was- an emotional rant from a teacher who was at wits end and feeling down on herself and needed to vent. I knew that going into this profession that there would be difficult classes but I got caught up in the frustration and thought that letting off a little steam into the wide blue yonder a to z would help.

    After sitting down and having a long hard look at my expectations of myself, my students, and the school I know that some re-evaluation is needed.

    So again thank you to those of you who are being helpful and trying to show some empathy. It is really appreciated. The kicker is that I thought it was getting better, but I guess it just isn't moving fast enough for the principal so I will try harder tomorrow and see if I can implement some new things to get us on task faster.
     
  13. NYTONJ

    NYTONJ Rookie

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    Sep 28, 2011

     
  14. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    Sep 28, 2011

    The 1st year is a really tough year. If you are going to stay in it, it will have to be because you believe you can do it and you enjoy teaching children. Nearly every 1st year teacher starts out really harsh or really weak as the child's friend. I applaud you for choosing the lesser of the 2 evils. I did the same as you. I did find soon that I could be more effective by being strict and talking in a more calm and less harsh way. When I could joke around with the kids, be a little calmer, but really enforce each rule in a calm way things got a lot better for me and the students. They cooperated more. You probably don't have much of an adjustment to make, but a bit might be really helpful to you having a good 1st year.
     
  15. soleil00

    soleil00 Comrade

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    I can say I have seen this happen (the behavior kids being loaded onto one teacher) because it happens in my school.

    One of my closest colleagues has always had the majority of the known behavior problems in the grade. She said they've been doing that for pretty much the entire time she's been teaching, 12 years, because she has experience with those kids. Last year she had a full class of behavior problems, not one was a calm, average kid. She's had scissors, boxes, pencils, and any other thing in her room thrown at her. She handles it though, so I guess that's why they keep going back to her.

    I'm not saying that's what happened here, I'm just saying that yeah..it happens.
     
  16. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Sep 29, 2011

    So sorry this happened. 1st yr teachers are notorious for having the worst kids. That's how I've always believed. Now as for the other 1st yr teacher who has ZERO problem students, the P's really playing favorites here, the other teacher must have kissed a$$, and/or there's nepotism somewhere, etc. So I assume you're sticking it out? I hope things get better.
     
  17. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    I find it so unfortunate that so many of you have experiences where classes are perceived to be so "loaded" with behaviour problems. I don't understand what possible purpose there could be in giving "all of the behaviour problems" to a new teacher. We work very hard to ensure that all of our classes reflect a balance of academic and behaviour needs. No teacher, regardless of experience has a class that is, on paper, vastly different from any other. First year teachers may feel much more overwhelmed by behaviour concerns than a teacher with more experience.

    I'm sorry that your year isn't turning out as you had hoped.
     
  18. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    MrsC, I know it happened this one year when I was a kinder teacher. The two afternoon teachers were in charge of making up the kinder list. The one afternoon kinder teacher KNEW she was going to be out all year on maternity leave (hence, I took over her job) and she and the other one actually, knowingly, put all of the trouble makers, low kids, etc. in the class that I ended up taking over. THe other afternoon kinder teacher told me this and apologized for stacking the class that way, that is was mostly the other kinder teacher's idea.

    No matter. I whipped them into shape and they did great. One of my kids even won the writing contest for the kindergarten category for the whole county. I ended up with a great class. So, there former afternoon kinder teacher!!! :D
     
  19. KateL

    KateL Habitué

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    Yes, many schools do give the worst students to the new teachers. The middle school where I used to teach had one science class that was full of students who needed extra remediation classes, and because of scheduling they all ended up in the same science class. Imagine 34 7th graders, with half of them being English learners, more than a third of them on IEPs, and another group who had such behavior problems that they were more than two grade levels behind in academics. How on Earth is one teacher supposed to meet all of those needs?? The experienced teachers ran away from this class as fast as they could, so it always got pawned off on the new teacher. It was awful.
     
  20. stephenpe

    stephenpe Connoisseur

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    I went to a meeting today after work for tutors working after hours.
    This lady showed up and she teaches at another school. Looked like a zombie. We asked if she was alright and she said she almost turned her keys in today. Sounds like the ones wanting to end public education are getting it done with all the things Im hearing.
    This year they added about 3 more layers of paperwork on us.
    It is getting beyond asinine. One day all the good teachers will leave and schools will crash and burn. I despise the current crop of politicians and their stupidity.
    How is that for a rant? btw I love my job
     
  21. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Sep 29, 2011

    Even seasoned teachers can learn from watching others...maybe the newbie has some great strategies the OP could use.

    It's a possibility that the other teacher SEEMS to have no behavior problems because she has good mgt. Skills. I'm not sure that it's true that first year teachers are notoriously given the 'worst kids' or if it sometimes only looks that way because the reality of classroom mgt is so much more difficult for some new teachers than their student teaching experiences may have led them to believe....this may not be the OP's case, but certainly tweaking the strategies she's using would be advisable.
     
  22. DrivingPigeon

    DrivingPigeon Phenom

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    Wow, sounds frustrating. I can relate somewhat-I feel like I was loaded with the behavior problems in my grade level, too. Even other teachers and staff have said things like, "Why would they put all of these kids in one room?" I'm sorry you're going through this. :( One thing that I am trying to do is connect with each child on some level. Try to find a little bit of good in each one of them (which is really difficult sometimes!).

    I don't know how your relationship is with the other teacher, but don't hold it against her that she has the good class and that your principal wants you to observe her (not saying you are holding it against her). I just know from experience because my former principal encouraged my former teammates to observe some of the things I was doing in literacy in my classroom. You can imagine how this went over, considering they were in their 14th and 15th years of teaching, and I was in my 2nd. They held it against me, which wasn't fair.

    Personally, I love observing other teachers, but I can see how it would be upsetting for someone to suggest you observe a fresh, new teacher. Maybe you could learn something, though. I think we can all learn so much from one-another!

    But don't give up yet. Keep tweaking your behavior management plan until you find something that works. What works for one group of kids may not work for the next.
     
  23. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Ok... I want to play the devil's advocate here. I am putting aside your opinions of the principal for just a moment. Just stay with me. I am currently working with two first year teachers. They share the same 42 students. One teaches LA and SS. The other teaches Math and Science. For half the day they have one group of 21 and the other half they have the other group of 21. In Teacher A's class the kids are unruly, out of their seats, talking constantly, and even doing things like making paper air planes, pretending to be in the matrix movie, asking inane questions during math, etc. They are a low performing group.

    In Teacher B's class this same group of kids are making connections in reading, having fantastic conversations about books, offering really helpful advice to their peer writers, and are very on task. They are a high performing group.

    But wait, did I not say that these are the same children? Well, let's take a closer look.... Teacher A has a kid that spent his entire year in the Asst. P's office for a multitude of offenses last year. She also has a child with several learning disabilities. She has 8 children on an RTi plan already and she has several children that were on RTi plans for behavior before they came to her 3rd grade classroom.

    Teacher B has the same kids. Same 504 issues. Same RTi kids. BUT, these are high performing kids that are functioning on grade level with some minor accommodations.

    Teacher A sees that the kids are doing well for Teacher B. Teacher B does have to talk to a few of the kids on occasion but the kids are redirected instantly and then complete work assignments. Some of these kids were not even motivated to work last year in 2nd grade.

    Are they the same kids? Do aliens take over their bodies? No, the difference is... Teacher B has a solid management system in place. She holds kids accountable for their behaviors. She follows up with both positive and negative consequences for students. She is building a rapport with parents and getting them on HER side. She is sending home notes when the child does something RIGHT. She is calling when she sees an issue that can be dealt with quickly. She is offering incentives for kids making good choices. She is consistently explaining the processes that she expects and models the behaviors that she wants to see.

    Teacher B has the children come in, take out their reading log, have it checked by a kid monitor, say the morning pledges, and hand out Reader's Workshop folders ALL STUDENT LED without her knit picking or reminders, or her nagging. Teacher B has the children lead conversations, allows for lively debates, encourages cooperative learning (down to the kids have to share 2 glue sticks at a table of 5), and EXPECTS conversations that foster learning.

    Teacher A nags the children to get quiet, begs the children to listen, and speaks to them in "harsh" tones through out her time with them. She plans elaborate lessons and gives the kids opportunities to complete assignments but, as usual there are a handful that produce NOTHING unless she stands over them.

    Are these really the same kids? Yes. Is Teacher A a bad teacher? Absolutely NOT! She is a great teacher that just needs a little tweaking. Her lessons are sound. Her practices and content knowledge are exceptional and her planning is creative and sticks to the state standards. So... now I step in. I offer suggestions. Some are taken. "BUT the kids are so uncooperative, so unmanageable, so...... She complains. I have her sit in on a conversation with Teacher A about the kids. Teacher A talks to the kids strengths. Suddenly Teacher B starts to see a light. A LIGHT that helps her to rethink her paradigm. Hmmm... If these kids are capable of THIS... Then, I should be able to get this same kind of insight out of them too! She starts to do a little research on the practices of Teacher B. She starts to implement some of Teacher B's strategies. " Hmmm... These kids are not so bad," she starts to think....

    Are things fully equitable in Teacher A and Teacher B's classes now? No. But are things better for Teacher B? Yes. She still has work to do and her attitude still needs to change as far as how she feels about the kids... But things today look 100X better than weeks 1-3.

    And my work here is NOT done.

    Sometimes you are dealt a tough class. How you handle that challenge is what sets you apart from the Teacher A's and the Teacher B's.
     
  24. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    GREAT post, SC!:thumb:
     
  25. MissScrimmage

    MissScrimmage Aficionado

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    This is what I was thinking...

    I have been accused of "getting the good class". I firmly believe it was my management skills - the students were engaged, on task, and there were consistent consequences.
     
  26. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Thanks czacza! I hope that I don't get hammered for talking about my own personal experiences. And I hope some Teacher B's out there feel pretty good about what they are accomplishihg every single day. There is NO DOUBT that the first year is tough. It is not the same as a subbing position and the constraints placed on a first year teacher in terms of time are unreal. So, having a challenging class can be even more difficult. BUT, if you make it through the first year... you learn so much. And the 2nd year things do get a BIT easier and the 3rd year, you are starting to feel ALMOST comfortable. By the 5th year you feel like you are really starting to be a great teacher. Of course there are always things that get in the way of great teaching. There will be coworkers that are not friendly or the occasional parent that questions every move you make. There is the child that struggles academically or behaviorally. But, in the end... the teacher B's of the world figure things out.
     
  27. skittleroo

    skittleroo Connoisseur

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    have to agree!
     
  28. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    Excellent post SCTeach--that post speaks volumes.
     
  29. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    If you wish to tell us some of the issues you are having more specifically (maybe even open another thread on it), we can try to help. I know you got a harsh response in here. Your first post is much different than this one. That happens sometimes when we are angry. Sometimes the system isn't perfect, but we can't always control that. What we can control is how we react to it.

    Let us know how things go. I hope it gets better for you, though it will take time.
     
  30. Linguist92021

    Linguist92021 Phenom

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    Oct 15, 2011

    I think observing teachers is a great idea. I still hear veteran teachers say they wish they had the time to do it. They would love the principal to have them visit other classrooms for a day and call in a sub to replace them.

    At the end of my student teaching I was lucky to be able to observe teachers for a week. I wished I could've done it sooner, but it was still priceless. I got to see the same students I had problems with in other classrooms, and they just acted like little angels. I saw many many teachers with very different management styles, but they all had control of their classrooms. Some did things i wouldn't even have considered, but those strategies made me think of something new. I got so many ideas. You really can't go wrong with observing.
    I tried to take advantage of it, and observed 2-3 teachers in one class, so I could see as many as possible.

    If you feel down, try to watch some movies that would inspire you. My personal fave is Dangerous Minds and Beyond the blackboard. Both of these teachers were handed the worst case scenario and they made the best of it.

    Good luck!!
     
  31. queenie

    queenie Groupie

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    Here's what I'm reading: You were excited to get the job, but were let down several times by a principal who didn't give you enough information and/or support. Then, you soon realized that your class is full of ALL the behavior problems and the other class has none. You asked for help from the principal and, instead, you get a reprimand for lack of management skills and have to go watch the other newbie in action, as though she has all the answers. That would really aggravate me, too!!

    Why don't you suggest that the principal observes as the other teacher teaches YOUR class a few times? :lol::lol::lol:
     
  32. Linguist92021

    Linguist92021 Phenom

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    I would NOT suggest that. Chances are the kids would listen to her, because of all of sudden she is a new face in the classroom, and often the unknown can bring more authority. When I'm subbing, I usually have awesome first days, because the kids don't know what to expect. I am strict, too, so that works. But after I am in their classroom several times, they get to know me, and relax a bit.

    In this scenario, if the other teacher taught the class and the kids did act better, or acted right, the OP would definitely would be made to look bad.
     
  33. Joyful!

    Joyful! Habitué

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    Oct 15, 2011

    You are singing my song. :) I could have written this post about 2 teachers with whom I deal. Upon suggesting that the one look at the management plan of the other, I was met with defensive resistance. Do I think that my teacher B is open to change? Nope. Do I hope she will be? Yup. Do I keep asking questions to open a discussion? Yup. Does she want to put her hands around my neck? Yup. Did she go above my head to complain? Yup. Is she seen as someone who will go far at my school (by anyone but me that is)? Nope.

    In professional sports, they have coaches. Baseball--pitching coach. Do you really think they don't know how to throw the ball fast, or over the plate or whatever? Of course they know how, they just can not see themselves as the coach sees them. When they tweak their game, they become unstoppable. That's why teachers get observed, get invited to observe other teachers, take professional development and go to staff meetings. Your admin wants you to be unstoppable.

    Now, to the OP. I know you are hurt and needed to rant. I'm glad you did. You did me a huge favor in allowing me an honest look at someone who was hurt by a suggestion. I know you came for comfort. I hope that you found some. You sound like someone who will persevere and have a great year if you can get past the idea that you have all of the problem kids. Every class has the problem kids. I've taught for a long time and the one thing your class needs is a teacher who believes her students are capable of great behavior. I'm sorry the transitions are not going well. I might suggest that you practice them for the first minute or two of recess daily until they can do them quickly and quietly during the regular class period.
     
  34. cheer

    cheer Comrade

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    Oct 15, 2011

    I agree with Web. I may be looking for a new position and was wondering what other nonclassroom positions would a teacher qualify for?
     
  35. queenie

    queenie Groupie

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    Oct 16, 2011

    I know- I was totally kidding. Just trying to lighten the mood. :hugs:
     
  36. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Oct 16, 2011

    OP, we haven't heard from you in a while... what did you decide to do?
     
  37. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Oct 16, 2011

    I wondered too.
     
  38. Youngteacher226

    Youngteacher226 Enthusiast

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    Oct 16, 2011

    SCTeach....you rock! :thumb:
     
  39. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Oct 18, 2011

    Awwww thanks!
     
  40. NYTONJ

    NYTONJ Rookie

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    Oct 19, 2011

    Update

    Well, I am not a quitter so I have stayed on :). The principal proves to be more and more unprofessional as the weeks go on. There have been some improvements as far as behavior since I have gotten some support. They relieved me of one of the issues and that has freed up a lot of time and energy to help the other students. Instead of focusing all of my time on three students who were disruptive I am now only dealing with two. The rest of the class is also working together better so that is another big help. What I may have left out is that these are students who are going through an extreme regime change.(Sorry if i sound cryptic but if I give anymore specifics it would be much too telling) So bottom line, I am working through it all. I am trying to enjoy my time with my students as much as possible and doing my absolute best to be the best teacher I can be. Thanks for wondering!

    Queenie-Thanks for the post, I really needed that!! :lol:
     
  41. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Oct 19, 2011

    Glad to hear things are better. If you were to give specifics... not names or places, but behaviorally what you are dealing with we may actually be able to give some helpful advice. I have had kids that are EXTREME behavior issues. It is tough. No doubt. But there are some ways to deal with the little darlings. Wishing you good luck!
     

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