Teaching kids respect/lying

Discussion in 'Elementary Education Archives' started by Stacey23, Apr 22, 2007.

  1. Stacey23

    Stacey23 Rookie

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    Apr 22, 2007

    I have a student in my class who is horrible at lying. The problem seemed to go away for a couple months, but lately it is coming back. You can sit there and watch him do something and then the next minute he will lie and say he never did that. It's not just with me, the cafeteria has problems with him lying, music, art, PE, he lies to everyone!

    How do you teach kids to be respectful and show them that lying is bad. It seems like such an important concept and I have no idea how to show them right from wrong.
     
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  3. Miss Kirby

    Miss Kirby Fanatic

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    Apr 22, 2007

    This is a good question. I'm still learning, but this is what I've been trying. To get the student to be honest I say things like, "I only have honest students in my classroom" or "I want to help you. I can't help you if you do not tell me the truth." Most of the time they usually blurt it out. Then I've got one kid, who I will see him to do something and he'll say he didn't do it, completely lying, like you said. This doesn't always work for him. I tell him that I'm not mad at him, he's not in trouble. It's okay if he made a bad choice, he's still a good kid. It's okay to make a mistake and be honest about it, but it's not okay to make a mistake and be dishonest about it. In our behavior program the first act of dishonesty they get a note home, and the second the student is removed from the classroom until parents come for a meeting.
     
  4. Stacey23

    Stacey23 Rookie

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    Apr 22, 2007

    Thanks for the advice. I feel like I've tried everything. We already had a meeting with his parents and the assistant principal and counselor. Last week he got in trouble for talking during silent period at lunch, so he was told the next day he would sit by himself. But then he lied about it to me and the lunch lady, so I took away his recess for lying. I explained to him that I do not tolerate lying and if he would of told the truth he wouldn't of lost his recess. I've tried explaining to him that it's ok to make mistakes, but when you lie about it, that it just gets worse. It get so bad with him that he eventually doesn't even know what the truth is anymore!
     
  5. Youngteacher226

    Youngteacher226 Enthusiast

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    Apr 22, 2007

    I do a "Peace Circle" during my morning meeting everyday, and that is where I get all of my "character education" in. Otherwise, we wouldn't have time. I use this 5-10 to maybe discuss how to treat our friends, bullying, getting along, conflict resolution or lying. We talk about scenerios and I let the kids tell me how they would handle the situation and what is really important is I have maybe 2 volunteers share something that they want to get off of their chests about something that happened at home or at school. It surprises me but my kids are not shy or afraid to bring up when a friend may have done something wrong to them or upset them. I have them look right at that friend and tell them what bothered them, and the friend knows to apologize and agree on a resolution. So I think you could incorporate lying into that by maybe having kids talk about when someone lied to them & how did they feel. Or talk about scenerios when a person may lie and give them alternatives to lying.:love:
     
  6. Miss Kirby

    Miss Kirby Fanatic

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    Apr 22, 2007

    I love the Peace Circle idea! I am going to do that next year. :)
     
  7. Stacey23

    Stacey23 Rookie

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    Apr 22, 2007

    I also like the Peace Circle idea. What grade do you teach? What's the oldest you think this would be appropriate for?
     
  8. JenL

    JenL Comrade

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    Apr 22, 2007

    i have a student that lies about everything too...
    my other students always ask why she lies all the time. it is such silly things most of the time and she just wants to be accepted but lying just doesn't work even in first grade....an example of a silly lie is last week we were reading a book about someone very old and she said she had a sister that was 99 in to one my other students....
    i am starting to teach the approach...you need to think about it and if it doesn't make sense just ignore it. i am sure this is not really the way to go about it but i have tried everything too. when students ask why she does it it does bring up a very good conversation about lying but i just can't get her to stop....
    so i feel your lying pain!
     
  9. Stacey23

    Stacey23 Rookie

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    You would think that having the other students point out they are lying would make them feel bad! Our school's character trait the other month was Honesty. When we were sitting in a circle talking about honesty I asked the class who thought they were honest and deserved being student of the month. Well, my little boy that lies all the time raises his hand, and one of the students actually said "you don't deserve it, you're lying right now by raising your hand, your never honest." So the other kids notice he is lying and they never believe anything he is saying, you would think that would be enough to get him to be honest, but NOPE!
     
  10. Youngteacher226

    Youngteacher226 Enthusiast

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    Apr 22, 2007

    I teach 2nd grade as well. I think you could never be too old to have some sort of "peace circle" in your class. I think even Jr. high could benefit from doing this and learning conflict resolution. Maybe just in a diff. way if its not in a circle on the carpet, but in a circle of chairs once a week.
     
  11. JenL

    JenL Comrade

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    Apr 22, 2007

    stacey23...i don't have them point out that she is lying but she does it 10-15 times a day just about little things and sometimes bigger...the little things though like saying she has a 99 year old sister i am trying to get my first graders to work out on their own because it occurs too much and the only way i can do it is to have them think about what she says then if they don't think it is true to ignore it not tell her about it or other people....
    i do a peace circle type thing in my morning meeting and her name is mentioned everyday and we talk though the problem but still it continues everyday!
     

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