Tattling

Discussion in 'Third Grade' started by Miss Bliss, Jan 30, 2008.

  1. Miss Bliss

    Miss Bliss Companion

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    Jan 30, 2008

    Just out of curiosity....what do you say to your third graders when they tattle?
     
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  3. Bernard

    Bernard Companion

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    Jan 30, 2008

    "Thank you for letting me know." Always those exact same words, unless first aid or other intervention is needed.

    If they have a genuine concern, they feel validated.
    If they are trying to get someone in trouble, they are disappointed.
    If they are seeking attention, even negative attention, such as a lecture on tattling, they soon discover that it is not coming.

    Also, it is a gentle response that does not scare more timid kids away from talking to you. I remember from childhood a 2nd grade teacher who would really belittle kids who tattled and make them wear a rope "tattle tale" tucked in their pants for punishment. I was a clueless kid, and pretty much avoided talking to that teacher at all because I didn't want to be called a tattle tale!
     
  4. Ms. Jane

    Ms. Jane Companion

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    Feb 2, 2008

    Tattling is something that really bothers me because I don't like it when kids want other people to get in trouble. In my classroom I have a rule that students are not allowed to tattle unless their feelings have been hurt or if they have been hit or see somebody getting hit. I really try hard to stick to this rule. When a student tattles and it's not one of the two reasons that I allow, I ask them if they have had their feelings hurt or if they have been hit. When they say no I remind them of the rule. It takes some kids some time to get used to this rule, but now I have a lot less tattling.
     
  5. MissV

    MissV Companion

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    Feb 6, 2008

    tattle jar

    In my classroom, we have a tattle jar. I talk to the kids about the difference between tattling & telling (telling-> something is wrong/broken/bleeding/on fire). If they have other concerns, they can write down the "tattle" and put it in the tattle jar. Once a month, we open the tattle jar, read them out loud, and have a good hearty chuckle about all of the tattles in the jar.

    I still have a little bit of tattling, but the tattle jar has eliminated 90% of it. I feel especially relieved not to have to be interrupted during small reading groups because "Bobby" is taking too many red trapezoids!
     
  6. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Feb 6, 2008

    Like the above poster, I have a tattle box. We go over what's allowed in the tattle box. At breaks, I'll go through and pick out the most serious ones and we'll discuss them as a class, keeping everything anonymous. Then we'll discuss what should be done in each situation.
     
  7. Ms.Hernandez

    Ms.Hernandez Rookie

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    Feb 22, 2008

    We also go over telling vs. tattling. I want to know if students are bleeding, being bullied, or dying...:)

    However, with tattling, I printed and laminated a picture of the president (hopefully I can change it next year :p) and pinned it to a corner of the room. If students feel the need to be heard by tattling, they can "Go Tell The President".
     
  8. FarFromHome

    FarFromHome Connoisseur

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    Feb 26, 2008

    I'm lucky, my kids don't tattle very often. Maybe it's because I don't really pay attention when they tattle. I just ask them why they're telling me that, and then they usually walk away and do something else-forgetting about it completely.
     
  9. MilitaryPara22

    MilitaryPara22 Rookie

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    Feb 28, 2008

    So what do you do when a student comes to you with a genuine tattle that you didn't see for yourself? For instance, Jane says, "Bobby hit me." But you didn't see it happen. Do you punish Bobby or just dismiss it?
     
  10. storyh

    storyh Companion

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    Mar 16, 2008

    Miss V,
    I love your idea of the tattle jar! I am going to use that in my room. I have some some kids (the sames ones usually) that LOVE TO TATTLE! "He touched my desk, he looked at me"-that sort of thing. I have just resorted to asking them, Are you hurt?, Are you bleeding? Are you dying? If they answer no, then I say you will be fine! But I like this idea also, and think it will work great in my room.
     
  11. ksteach

    ksteach Rookie

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    Mar 20, 2008

    We had a lesson on the difference between tattling and telling. We also talked about if they are trying to get someone in trouble, or are really hurt or upset.

    I ask a the question "are you tattling?" If they say no, they can tell me. I then tell them thank you for telling me (no matter what it is). If it was a tattle, I talk to them about why, and if not, I take care of the situation.

    I do have one more rule: The upset person has to be the one to tell a teacher (unless there is an injury).
     
  12. TeacherKay9

    TeacherKay9 Rookie

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    Apr 23, 2008

    good book

    There's a great book for this... it's title is Tattling Madeline that helps teach kids the difference between "reporting" and "tattling." My principal came and read it to my class within the first week of school because we could already tell then that tattling was going to be a huge issue. So when a child comes to me I ask them, "Is this tattling or reporting?" before he or she even opens his or her mouth. It hasn't been a cure-all, but it's definitely helped reduce the tattling.
     
  13. MissFroggy

    MissFroggy Aficionado

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    Apr 24, 2008

    Do you mean tattling like, "Joey is coloring on the table!"

    Or, "Joey won't let Mike and me join the game!"

    I almost NEVER get the first one... I don't know why.... but with the second we go over strategies for getting what you need, communication, etc. so I tell the kids to use those.
     
  14. mcangel

    mcangel Rookie

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    May 17, 2008

    I had that same problem for a while, to which my response was exactly what Bernard said ('thanks for letting me know.') However, I got tired of that too, and did a lesson on tattling using a story that I got from edhelper.com (PM me if you want the lesson). Following that lesson, I always ask them if they are trying to get someone into trouble or out of danger, which I later shortened to saying "In or out?" If they are trying to get someone into trouble, we created a tattle bin for students to write their tattles down. I read them aloud once a week (without using names) and we get laughs. Out of danger situations are handled immediately. It's worked well it supports my expectation that they need to do their best to handle social situations.
     
  15. Pisces_Fish

    Pisces_Fish Fanatic

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    May 18, 2008

    I need an answer to this, too. It's driving me crazy, I never know what to do. :eek:
     
  16. kidsandpups

    kidsandpups Companion

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    May 18, 2008

    A colleague of mine had the kids go over and tell the class pet (guinea pig) what they wanted to tattle. (Second graders)
     
  17. Mommateach

    Mommateach Rookie

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    May 18, 2008

  18. leighbball

    leighbball Virtuoso

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    May 18, 2008

    I talk to the kid who supposedly did the hitting/other action, put on my detective hat, and do my best to get to the bottom of the situation through witnesses, etc. If I can't figure it out or people aren't telling the same story, I get the admin involved. Bullying isn't tolerated in my school, so the admins have no problem trying to get to the bottom of the problem. It takes away from instructional time sometimes, but I want my kids to know that I don't tolerate that type of behavior. But I also won't punish Bobby for it unless Bobby truly did something to warrant punishment.
     
  19. leighbball

    leighbball Virtuoso

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    May 18, 2008

    I also love the idea of the tattling jar...I will definitely use that next year!! :) Do you have little slips of paper already made up for the jar?
     

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