Surprise! Secret Santa!

Discussion in 'General Education' started by TamaraF, Dec 12, 2012.

  1. TamaraF

    TamaraF Companion

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    Dec 12, 2012

    My daughter came home (grade 5) on Tuesday and told me that her class was doing Secret Santa. They drew names Tuesday, and the "fun" was to begin on Wednesday. Something small every day until next Thursday....
    I am furious. Why would a teacher do this without telling parents? What about the Jewish kid? The JW? What about families that can't spare even a few cents? My daughter drew the name of a little boy who wasn't even there that day. She has no idea what he likes or is interested in. What about that poor boy....he has no idea he even is participating!!
     
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  3. Grammy Teacher

    Grammy Teacher Virtuoso

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    Dec 12, 2012

    Nothing to be furious about. Just get some stuff and be happy so your daughter enjoys the holiday spirit as much as she can.
     
  4. Em_Catz

    Em_Catz Devotee

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    Dec 12, 2012

    That does seem rather insensitive on the teachers part, not only because children might not be able to participate due to financial, religious or other personal reasons, but it puts the parents on the spot.

    As an elementary teacher, I cannot imagine doing that to my parents. At worse, I could see maybe if we did a secret note project in which everyone draws a name and in class (or at home) creates a holiday card and/or letter for the person. (And even then I'd send home a note explaining the project, some construction paper, a couple sheets for letter writing and an envelope.)
     
  5. msufan

    msufan Comrade

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    Dec 12, 2012

    Just use things from around the house... a fancy pencil, a sheet of stickers, etc.
     
  6. knitter63

    knitter63 Groupie

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    Dec 12, 2012

    Tamara, I understand your frustration! As a 5th grade teacher, I would never do this last minute, or without parent consent for participation.
    I can tell you what my 5th grade boys like to give you some ideas: pens, mechanical pencils, markers, drawing paper, "boy" looking erasers, nerf balls, trading cards are a few that I can think of right now!
     
  7. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Dec 12, 2012

    I don't think there's any reason to be "furious". I did a secret santa with my homeroom and just asked the kids who wanted to participate and who didn't. In Spanish it's called "Amigos Secretos" and has nothing to do with Christmas.

    You can have your daughter make a homemade card. Lots of my kids gave chocolate bars or other candy. Marbles, hacky sack, toy snakes, funky straws. Just go to the Dollar Store.

    I do think it is odd that you have to give so many gifts.
     
  8. physteach

    physteach Companion

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    Dec 12, 2012

    We do it in my school, only we call it "secret snowflake". Mostly the kids give each other candy.
     
  9. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    Dec 12, 2012

    A few years ago, not doing this would have been an issue.
     
  10. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Dec 12, 2012

    Life is too short to spend time being "furious" about something like this. Maybe a quick note to the teacher telling her that you would have appreciated having some input or notice about this activity ahead of time would be a good idea. Even after that, though, you're probably just going to go ahead and get some small gifts for this kid. It's not the end of the world.
     
  11. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Dec 12, 2012

    As a parent I would've been not to happy either. The teacher probably had the idea a while ago....

    Do you have like some fruit snacks or something that is packaged your lil one can bring. Maybe you can do some warm fuzzies or cards the first couple of days and grab something from the dollar store or something over the weekend.

    My mom is doing a count down thing and today we got one of those triangle peg games (you know like at cracker barrel) for $1 it's snowmen and reindeer.
     
  12. Go Blue!

    Go Blue! Connoisseur

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    Dec 12, 2012

    I agree with others that this is no reason to be furious. This is about the students doing nice things for each other and being suprised by what their Secret Santa gives them each day. Also, the dollar store has tons of cheap stuff for young boys.
     
  13. TamaraF

    TamaraF Companion

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    Dec 13, 2012

    Thanks for the helpful ideas! The school is very strict with food items, so all candy and other treats are banned. I like the idea of mechanical pencils, cool erasers, and little games. I guess my main frustration came from the lack of communication ahead of time.
     
  14. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    I do agree that this was poor judgement by the teacher. If this is the worst thing this teacher does, you are in good shape. I agree with Caesar, I don't think it is anything to get furious about.

    I would handle it the same way you'd like someone to tell you, if you had made a honest non-serious mistake.
     
  15. Cicero

    Cicero Companion

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    Dec 13, 2012

    I'm not too bothered by the concept, but I don't like that the teacher automatically signed up the kids as participating without checking with parents/guardians first. It just seems odd to mandate something that has a financial burden... even though it is really normally between 5-10 dollars (which for some families is a bigger deal than most). I think it would have been cuter to have the kids make something in class for their gift recipient.
     
  16. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Dec 13, 2012

    Magistra...agree with you... I remember in elem school we did a gift in class but it had to be the size of a shoe box. It had to be for either sex. We opened them at our party... it was fun, BUT our parents knew ahead of time.
     
  17. applecore

    applecore Devotee

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    Dec 15, 2012

    I can understand the frustration over the timing, but perhaps there's a part missing in the instructions that the teacher might have forgotten to say, or the students didn't hear. Perhaps just a note of thanks for being a great person, or hey, you're awesome at playing basketball, or I like how you treated the kid who fell on the playground, or whatever. That's probably a long the lines of "bucket filling", but it's cheap...paper and pencil goes a long way.

    We live in an economy that people forget how just the simple things mean the most.
     

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