Suffering from severe depression, struggling...

Discussion in 'General Education' started by WaterfallLady, Feb 25, 2015.

  1. WaterfallLady

    WaterfallLady Enthusiast

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    Feb 25, 2015

    I'm a special ed teacher, I'm 31. I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression when I was 12, though my drs think I had it sooner. I've always just functioning fine, until last March.

    The depression hit like an F5 tornado. It left nothing left of me. I had problems with medications and doctors, and even got a case of seretonin sydrome, which can be fatal. I am on medications but I am just doing so bad.

    I started the year subbing because I knew I couldn't do a regular job this year. I took a 6 week assignment that turned into a rest of the year assignment because the teacher couldn't come back.

    I don't know what to do. I'm struggling tremendously. I need time to focus on myself. I also need not to burn my bridges.

    Advice?
     
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  3. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Feb 25, 2015

    Do you have both medical and talk treatments at this time? It sounds like you need that combination to work through your current crisis. I try to compare depression to diabetes; it is real and it can do bad things to you if you don't find the right management plan.
     
  4. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    Feb 25, 2015

    I found subbing was a job as emotionally taxing as anything I have ever done. I am an optomist and very cheerful, but I could feel depressed over many of the subbing days I had.

    For me, going into a stranger's classroom where the students aren't that interested in me, but are interested in what they can get away with now that the real teacher is gone? It was a challenge, and I couldn't imagine doing it with depression. I think you should sit down with your doctor and see what he/she thinks. Your doctor far better understands you and what might be the best job setting for you than I or anyone on this site. Good luck to you.
     
  5. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    Okay I read your post a little closer. Sounds like it is more like a permanent type position, than a sub position. Still sounds like your best decision is to discuss this with your doctor who is more aware of your illness. Good luck to you.
     
  6. mcqxu

    mcqxu Comrade

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    Feb 25, 2015

    Sending prayers your way! No other words of advice, I agree with what others have said about discussing with your doctor/therapist the best route for you right now.
     
  7. WaterfallLady

    WaterfallLady Enthusiast

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    Feb 26, 2015

    I did not find day-to-day subbing emotionally taxing at all. I got to pick which district to sub in and the type of classrooms. If I felt bad I didn't have to go. Right now, I'm a permanent sub which means I get paid like a sub but I have the same class til the end of the year (since October).
     
  8. WaterfallLady

    WaterfallLady Enthusiast

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    I am seeing a doctor one time a week and a therapist every other week. My doctor is not good and I'm working to change him.
     
  9. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Feb 26, 2015

    Changing doctors just might do the trick. Perhaps your therapist has some recommendations?
     
  10. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    Feb 26, 2015

    I feel for you and I'm so sorry that you are struggling to manage it. You need a doctor who you have confidence in, someone who is good at medication and combinations of meds. You may need something different for the crisis situation which you are in than for the chronic depression. Please don't give up. If you need to take time off, then you should do so, even if it is temporary. If you don't have anyone at home to talk to, then come back here. Feel free to PM me.

    Hugs.
     
  11. WaterfallLady

    WaterfallLady Enthusiast

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    I have Medicaid now because I am subbing and there are almost no psychiatrists that take Medicaid.
     
  12. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    Is there a mental health center nearby? Many counties operate them.
     

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