A substitute teacher was trying to make use of her psychology background. She began her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, please stand up." Right away, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Why do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "I don’t, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!":lol: Aren't kids great?:thumb: http://www.cleanjoke.com/humor/Substitute-Teacher.html I know teaching is a stressful profession, but I think that it's healthy to take it all in stride and have a good sense of humor about it too. This can be our jokes section on the great profession of teaching. Let's have a good laugh.
Teacher: Well, at least there's one thing I can say about your son. Father: What's that? Teacher: With grades like these, he couldn't be cheating.
Substitute Teacher Walking through the hallways at the middle school where I work, I saw a new substitute teacher standing outside his classroom with his forehead against a locker. I heard him mutter, "How did you get yourself into this?" Knowing that he was assigned to a difficult class, I tried to offer moral support. "Are you okay?" I asked. "Can I help?" He lifted his head and replied, "I'll be fine as soon as I get this kid out of his locker."
That locker joke sounds like some of my days. Hey I never knew there were such great sub jokes out there--thanks for starting this thread.
When I arrived for my daughter’s parent-teacher conference, the teacher seemed a bit flustered, especially when she started telling me that my little girl didn’t always pay attention in class and was sometimes a little flighty. “For example, she’ll do the wrong page in the workbook,” the teacher explained, “and I’ve even found her sitting in the wrong desk.” “I don’t understand that,” I replied defensively. “Where could she have gotten that?” The teacher went on to reassure me that my daughter was still doing fine in school and was sweet and likeable. Finally, after a pause, she added, “By the way, Mrs. Johnson, our appointment was for tomorrow.”.
Teacher: "Did it take long for you to do this take home test?" Student: "Call my Mom! She knows how long it took her to do it." (An original) Rebel1
Teacher:" Johnny! If I gave you 4 candy bars and Timmy came running along and grabbed 2 of them. What are you going to have?" Johnny:" I'll still have the 4 bars, BUT you better have some ice for Timmy's eye!" (Original) Rebel1
Okay, this one's true. I was subbing for preschool and it was in the last 2 weeks of school. As the kids were lining up and getting ready to go home, I said, "So, have you kids learned everything you'd hoped to this year?" One little girl said, "Yeah, but I never did find out where babies come from." I said, "Oh, I'm sure you'll learn that next year dear."
I got this one out of some magazine, a while back. It's about Sunday School though. I don't remember the name they used for the little girl and the exact wording, BUT here it goes... The class was having a discussion about Heaven and all the children were very fascinated about Heavean. To end the class the teacher asked one of the little girls a question abt Heaven. Teacher: "Cindy! Would you like to go to Heaven?" Cindy: "No! My mother wants me to come straight home after church." Rebel1
