student teacher

Discussion in 'Elementary Education Archives' started by janlee, Sep 8, 2006.

  1. janlee

    janlee Devotee

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    This morning I walked in front of a student teacher. (not mine) I apologized to her. She looked at me and said, "That's ok hon." I responded nicely by saying my name is Mrs. H------. She looked at me and said I know it is Jan. (my first name) I then continued on my way. I was completely blown away that a young woman (around 21) who is planning on becoming a professional would repond that way to a veteran teacher who is 50 years of age. I don't want to approach her cooperating teacher because he can blow things out of proporation. Where are young people's manners today?
     
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  3. Beth2004

    Beth2004 Maven

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    She is probably just trying to be friendly with the other people in the building. She may call her cooperating teacher and others in the building by their first names and think nothing of it. I know I did. The only time I've ever called other teachers I've worked with Mr or Mrs so-and-so is when we are in front of the students. Whether they are older than me or have more experience than me or not I've always seen myself as one of their colleagues and therefore a peer at least in the professional world.
     
  4. kcbutterfly

    kcbutterfly Companion

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    I agree with Beth 2004. I think she is probably just trying to fit in and try to feel included in the school.
     
  5. NYSTeacher

    NYSTeacher Companion

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    But still as a student teacher you should refer to all teachers in the building with respect and call them but the last names. even when I started subbing in the school I student taught in it took me a long time before i felt confrotable calling my cooperating teachers by their first names.
     
  6. clarnet73

    clarnet73 Moderator

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    I think that may depend upon where you are. When i was student teaching, the other teachers introduced themselves to me using their first names... so that was how I addressed them, even though most of them were much older then me.
     
  7. MissFrizzle

    MissFrizzle Virtuoso

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    I had trouble with this too.:eek: I even called Miss so and so who was younger than me by Miss. It's always the best way to start out. Usually most teachers will let you know what they prefer to be called.
     
  8. mrs.teacher5

    mrs.teacher5 Companion

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    I do not think that she meant anything by it. I agree that as a young teacher I respect veteran teachers, but that does not mean that I call them Mrs..... I would think that she just feels comfortable calling teachers by their first names and that she is not trying to be offensive. However, if you would like to be called Mrs....I think that you should simply tell her what your preference is. If she continues to call you by your first name then I think that she is being a bit rude and perhaps you should speak with the appropriate person.
     
  9. heyMiss!

    heyMiss! Rookie

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    I've been wondering about this... In my first internship I never heard other teachers call each other by first names (even at lunch). They always called me Miss __ as well. This semester I am at a different school and everybody uses first names except in front of students. I've mostly been referring to my CT as Mrs. __ but other teachers refer to her by first name when speaking with me. So, I'm confused. Should I stick with the formal until someone gives me permission to use first name, or it becomes really evident that it would be best?

    At my last job (at a university), my supervisor told me on my first day working with him to use first names with everybody there. I was in a quandry when instructors who came to us for help used their first name with me in our office, because I certainly needed to use their last names outside of the office--especially when I was their student!).
     
  10. Research_Parent

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    Ohhh, how the rules of formality have changed.

    Anyone over the age of 13 may call you by your first name, if you address them by their first name. If you address others by title and last name, then they are to return the formality by addressing you with your title and last name. One small note, as mentioned earlier, in the presence of children under the age of 13, all adults should be formally addressed.

    Even on the college campus, students and professors have a hard time remembering this.

    I have a hard time with this...I served in the military and went by my last name for so long, that I sometimes forget to respond when addressed by my first name.
     
  11. lteach2

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    If it is before or after school hours (ie no children around), I believe it is ok for you to address each other informally. If everyone called me "Ms. ...." all the time, I'd hate it. However, I don't think that ST should have called you "hon." I really don't like it when people call other adults "hon" or "sweetheart." Just call me by my real name. If she had just addressed you by your first name, would it have been so bad, or was it just the "hon" that set it off? If I had addressed someone in an informal situation and they corrected me, I definetely would be taken a back. I guess you just have to know when and where is the correct time for each.
     
  12. Beth2004

    Beth2004 Maven

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    I think the "hon" thing is a personal preference, though. I have no problem with other people calling me things like that. One of my past supervisors calls everyone "dear." That's just how she talks. I never thought anything of it until recently when she told me that someone corrected her and said, "My name is...." I guess I never thought it was a big deal, but it does bother some people.
     
  13. lteach2

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    Haha-well I guess the only people I really would let get away with that would be my mother and my boyfriend. :)
     
  14. MissFrizzle

    MissFrizzle Virtuoso

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    Honestly, although I don't think the ST should have addressed you by using "hon", I think she may have been trying to "fit in" and think of herself as a peer and colleague.

    I guess "hon" would have bothered me slightly, but I wouldn't sweat it.
     
  15. mrachelle87

    mrachelle87 Fanatic

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    In my building, it is not a case of manners. We have several teachers by the same last name. We have three Mrs. Williams. We also have several husband/wife teams. A couple of sisters-in-laws also teach in our district.

    The other day our principal called over asked the secretary if she could get me on the phone please. The principal used my first name. The secretary went two doors down and got a teacher that worked there last year with the same first name. After a few minutes of the principal asking her about a problem I had been having, the other teacher discovered that the principal was talking to the wrong teacher!!! The secretary calls me by Mrs. M...., so she never thought about my first name.

    I call one of my teaching partners by her first name, but the other I still call her Mrs. F...., just because I am not comfortable with her yet. And they both are very much older than me.
     
  16. halpey1

    halpey1 Groupie

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    When I was student teaching - I always called other teachers Mr./Mrs./Ms. first - and let them tell me to use their first name. That's just me. Almost all of them said to use their first names after that. Even when I got my first job I did this - unless they introduced themselves by their first name. I'm super polite though. :D
     
  17. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    I cannot believe someone would get offended by being called "hon"!

    I often times refer to my students as "hon" and "sug" (sugar) - and if anyone called me this I would think absolutely nothing of it.

    :confused:
     
  18. Rosieo

    Rosieo Enthusiast

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    Personal preference I guess. I would not be offended if someone called me "hon" but I wouldn't like it. The only person that I would want to call me that is my husband.
     
  19. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Yes...certainly a matter of personal preference. :)
     
  20. dolphinswim

    dolphinswim Companion

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    Sep 9, 2006

    I would be offended!

    I am hon or dear to one person...my hubby. I am in my mid 30's and I will only address teachers by mr/mrs/ms. In turn I will be addressed by mrs. The teacher I car pool with will use my first name in the car or at lunch away from the building. I do this because there is such a lack of respect for anyone now days!

    I did have a new teacher call me sweetie and I said I am sorry my name is not sweetie, it is Mrs. Swim...and she said well I call everyone sweetie or dear (that is how she was raised) I told her she won't be calling me that in or out of school. I may sound harsh but I respect authority and I expect to have respect shown to me to!

    Even my daughter's dates, they will address us as Mr. and Mrs. or they will get a quick lesson in manners!:)
     
  21. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    I just think it is strange that a young adult, new to a job, would call an older, established teacher 'Hon'. If janlee sensed that the new teacher was being impertinent, then perhaps she was. There is a lot more to communication than the titles themselves. It is also possible that she was just trying to fit in and doesn't have very good social awareness.
     
  22. lteach2

    lteach2 Cohort

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    I call my students honey or sweetheart, too. But then again, they're 7 and 8 years old. Like another poster said, "I am only those names to my husband," or in my case, my boyfriend. My mom can still call me that, too. But I always laugh a little inside when another adult woman calls me "hon" or something like that.
     
  23. lupin43

    lupin43 Companion

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    Sep 9, 2006

    As a student teacher and even as a new first year teacher, I usually guess the first time as to whether or not I can call the other person by their first name. Then I immediately ask what they would prefer to be called. That way I know and there is no question.
     
  24. elem_teacher3

    elem_teacher3 Companion

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    Veteran or not...21 or 44....we are all adults and it shouldn't ruffle our feathers if someone calls us by our first name or last. The 'hon' things...that could have just been how she was raised...I have a problem with veteran teachers treating new young teachers more like a student than a co-worker.
     
  25. amelie77

    amelie77 Rookie

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    I find this thread very interesting! I think it is a bit odd that a student teacher would call another teacher hon. That is a bit disrespectful in my eyes. I know that some people just have this thing where they call everyone hon or dear, but that shouldn't happen when a student teacher is talking to a veteran teacher. Student teachers are still students. A student teacher is not a co-worker, they are a student. Respectfully, you should call the teachers in the building Mrs. or Miss. so and so until they ask you to do differently. I can understand why Janlee was a little unsettled by this.
     
  26. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    WITH ALL DUE RESPECT:

    Dolphinswim said: "I did have a new teacher call me sweetie and I said I am sorry my name is not sweetie, it is Mrs. Swim...and she said well I call everyone sweetie or dear (that is how she was raised) I told her she won't be calling me that in or out of school. I may sound harsh but I respect authority and I expect to have respect shown to me to!"

    Yes, it does sound harsh. I don't think she was purposely showing you disrespect and is more than likely a sincerely sweet person. You must consider a person's intentions in all things.

    For the record, I would not personally address an adult as "hon" but I would in no way on God's green earth be offended if a younger person addressed me in that manner. For example, if I am at the grocery and the young clerk says "Thanks hon" I'd say "thank you" and not think twice. I sure hope I don't get too uptight as I "mature"! :)

    elem_teacher3 said: "I have a problem with veteran teachers treating new young teachers more like a student than a co-worker."

    I agree. I know in this case the lady was a student teacher, but I completely believe that a student teacher should be treated with just as much respect as a certified teacher. Shouldn't everyone be treated with respect? I think a student teacher iscomparable to a co-worker...and if they are not being seen as one I think that is unfortunate. I truly believe that many teachers are very snobby to incoming teachers...and that is just really too bad.
     
  27. Steph-ernie

    Steph-ernie Groupie

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    I do get bothered when other adults call me hon or sweetie or dear, etc. To me, that sounds condescending. My student teaching involved two placements. The first was at the school I attended, and many of my teachers still teach there. I called most of them Mrs. and Mr, even though they told me to call them by their first names. (I just couldn't bring myself to do it) The next placement was at a school completely new to me, and I always addressed teachers by first name. I was an adult, there was no reason not to.
     
  28. ms_chandler

    ms_chandler Comrade

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    I just turned 25, and I was 21 when I was student teaching. I admit that I even called my coop teacher Mrs. ____. But that made me feel just like a kid. I was teaching high school seniors, and I called teachers by the same names that they called them. I don't think there is anything wrong for a student teacher to call a teacher by her first name. I just didn't really feel comfortable calling the older teachers by their first names. I could call anyone up to their mid-30s by their first name, but that was it.

    Even now, I call most older teachers by just their last name... not Mrs. Smith, but just Smith.... etc.... To each his own.
     
  29. Beth2004

    Beth2004 Maven

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    Exactly.
    During my student teaching placement I was in the same classroom from January-May, Mon-Fri, 8am-3pm. I was not just a student, I was a teacher who was part of the school and was treated as such. I went to meetings and workshops outside of school hours with these people and they all saw me as a colleague. I was even invited to their staff "martini night" that they have once a month at a local restaurant.

    If every teacher I worked with who was older than I am (which is most of them considering I'm only 23) asked me to call him or her Mr. or Mrs. Last Name, I would feel very uncomfortable and feel as though he or she was being VERY condescending to me. I'm not a child. I have my degree...and honestly? I worked harder for my degree and to receive my teaching license than most of the veteran teachers in my area did because the strict rules and requirements that are in place now have only been around for about 6 years. There was no state test for them to take. I took three in order to be licensed. They are "grandfathered in" and don't have to receive their Masters degree. I only have 5 years to get mine or I cannot renew my license.

    Calling people Mr. or Mrs. because you are not comfortable calling the person by his or her first name is one thing. I can understand that, but I don't feel that a person should be expected to call a coworker by his or her last name just because the coworker is older and has more experience.
     
  30. lteach2

    lteach2 Cohort

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    "Calling people Mr. or Mrs. because you are not comfortable calling the person by his or her first name is one thing. I can understand that, but I don't feel that a person should be expected to call a coworker by his or her last name just because the coworker is older and has more experience."

    I agree. I am also 23 and the youngest teacher in my school. However, most of us at my school address each other by first name during times students aren't around. We're all adults, we all work together, so we're comfortable. The only person I still call Mr. all the time is our Principal. Infact, a lot of the older teachers I work with ask me for ideas or say they like my ideas! I hear a lot of "You're the new body and you have so many good, new ideas!" However, there are of course, many, many important things to learn from your veterans.
     
  31. pfnw

    pfnw Rookie

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    I cannot believe someone would get offended by being called "hon"!

    I often times refer to my students as "hon" and "sug" (sugar) - and if anyone called me this I would think absolutely nothing of it.


    That must be a regional thing. I have yet to hear anyone use those terms in a school setting.

    I can't imagine anyone in a professional setting using those terms, but hey, times have changed.
     
  32. pfnw

    pfnw Rookie

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    By the way, since we are on the subject of student teachers, I have noticed an air of arrogance/ disrespect from some new teachers fresh out of college. (They) refer to veteran older teachers as dinosaurs and being part of the problem schools can't meet AYP. Has anyone else run into this?
     
  33. Beth2004

    Beth2004 Maven

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    If those are the type of people you are running into then I feel very sorry for you.
     
  34. amelie77

    amelie77 Rookie

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    I am only 24 also, but I do feel that Janlee has a right to be uncomfortable with someone calling her hon. She is using the board to vent about something that bothered her. This doesn't mean that she is going to go back and make a big scene about it to the other teacher. That wouldn't be appropriate. Younger teachers should be treated as equals. I deal with that struggle everyday, but a student teacher calling another teacher she is working with hon is odd, and maybe that student teacher should think twice about it. Like another said, I think that this may be a regional thing and some might take offense to it while others hear it all the time and don't care. I think we just need to remember that everyone has a right to an opinion, and things that might not offend one would offend another. Younger teachers and older teachers may have different views on what is and is not respectful. There is a thirty year gap between a 20 year old student teacher and a 50 year old veteran teachers.
     
  35. elem_teacher3

    elem_teacher3 Companion

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    It is completely absurd for a veteran teacher to get offended because a student teacher used their first name and tact on a 'hon'...just like it would have been completely absurd for the student teacher to react to being jumped in front of. I think there are a lot of teachers who have forgotten how it feels to be a student teacher or a beginning teacher. It is almost like they have to pass an initiation process in order to gain any respect of a 'seasoned' teacher. There is nothing threatening about fresh ideas coming into a profession...some times both sides need to really lighten up...
     
  36. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Pfnw said: "I have yet to hear anyone use those terms [hon/sug] in a school setting. I can't imagine anyone in a professional setting using those terms, but hey, times have changed."

    You honestly haven't heard a teacher refer to a student as "hon"? I sincerely find that fascinating. I say it all day long and while I don't consciously think about it, it is a way to let the students know I care about them. I need to get out more and see how the rest of the world operates! :)

    elem_teacher3 said: "It is almost like they have to pass an initiation process in order to gain any respect of a 'seasoned' teacher."

    I have thought this exact same thing numerous times! Your statement is very true in many circumstances.
     
  37. LuvTchng

    LuvTchng Companion

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    This is a very interesting thread. I'll have to agree with those who have said that this is likley all a matter of personal preference. I am certainly not bothered when I'm called hon. The reading specialist at my school calls everyone hon and sug when speaking to them...even our principal. I figured it was probably a habit she picked up in her twenty plus years of teaching kindergarten.

    I was raised to always address adults as Ms. Mrs. or Mr. so it was very difficult in the beginning for me to call my cooperating teacher and colleagues by their first names but I've gotten used to it. I don't see anything disrespectful about an adult addressing another adult by first name. We do, however, try to stick with formalities around the students. But it's not like the students don't know my first name. I wear a name badge and I teach fourth graders. They can read. It is important that we treat all teachers, even preservice teachers, like adults. To me this means we shouldn't reprimand them for calling us by our first names. Think about it...if a cashier handed you change and said, "Okay sugar, you have a nice day!" would you reply with, "My name is Mrs. ____" I certainly hope not. If it bothers you to be called something other than your formal name just say so in a polite way, but please don't sweat the small stuff.
     
  38. Raising3boys

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    As others have stated, I too find this thread interesting. We just hired a new teacher at our school. She has been teaching for about 8 years. She addresses everyone it seems hon, sweetie, and babe including adults. The first time I met her, she said it and I am only a few years older than she is. I was floored, but thought it was a regional thing too.( She moved here from out of state.) I notice in staff meetings and such she says addresses all "grown-ups" this way, except our principal.

    I didn't get offended; I just think it sounds odd. If this is the worst I get called by someone, I have it made!

    I do call my students, "sweetie, honey, etc." I treat my students actually if they were my own boys. The parents do appreciate it and I have told them upfront. I do not think that it is odd because sometimes it is the only term of endearment they hear.

    I guess if you really want someone to call you Mrs.____, you need to say explicitly, I would prefer you to call me Mrs.____. I am sure that is all it will take.
     
  39. TeacherRW

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    I have been thinking about this thread for a couple of days now and finally am going to post on it.

    I think that this whole episode/situation boils down to respect and manners. I do not think that the "veteran teacher" was shown the respect she deserved. Whether by passing mandated tests or being in the "trenches" for 30 years, there should be a certain amount of respect shown to those teachers who are contracted. After all, weren't you taught to respect your elders? Colleagues or not, they are still our elders. Manners... that's what was lacking in this case as well as a bit of respect. I *just* ran into this myself this past week. Our PE teacher entered the lounge. As he was doing so, I said, "Good afternoon, Mr. S____. How are you today?" He responded and said something to the effect of having been raised to use my manners. He validated it by saying that manners dictate a person be called "Mr./Miss/Mrs." until said person mentions/suggests otherwise. Old-fashioned.... perhaps. Do I call most of my colleagues by their first names? Yes, but only after I have used their "proper name" several times. Would that same student teacher call the principal "hon" or use his/her first name on one of their first meeings?? I certainly hope not for the student teacher's sake... respect is due with authority as well as position.

    As far as due respect to student teachers, yes, I do believe that they should be respected. However, I lose a GREAT deal of respect for those individuals who critique veteran teachers or have that "air of superiority". Several of the last student teachers in our building have bordered on "cocky" and have had little to no respect for those individuals who are contracted teachers.

    Getting to using endearments... I use them frequently with my students. BUT, I would never have in a million years thought of calling a contracted teacher "hon/sweetie/dear" while doing my student teaching!! Just as a contracted teacher, I would never use those phrases towards my principal or the superintendent.

    OK... off my soapbox and out to flip the chicken on the grill....
     
  40. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    I tend to agree, but not necessarily because the student teacher is still a student. The somewhat rude aspect to this situation was simply because of the age differential. I think the veteran teacher deserved to be treated in a more dignified manner simply because she was older than the student teacher. It didn't sound like it had much to do with being teachers, but more to do with common manners. It is presumptive for a younger coworker to call an older coworker "Hon" or any other term of endearment.
     
  41. lteach2

    lteach2 Cohort

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    Sep 12, 2006

    Aren't all teachers contracted? I don't know, maybe this differs from state to state.
     

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