So, I kind of got in trouble

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by Bella2010, Apr 21, 2012.

  1. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    Hi All,

    My P said he hoped I planned to attend our next PTO meeting. I went to the first one, but not the last one. We have another at 6:00in a couple of weeks. I went to our first one because my husband was off and could watch our little boy. The second one I didn't attend because my husband was working. Well, my husband is working when the next PTO meeting will take place.

    He goes to daycare two days a week, and my mom watches him the rest of the time. Even though she would, I don't want to ask her to watch him anymore than she already does. He's a very active 2 year-old and my mom is 60 - she needs her breaks!

    IDK, I know I should go, but I don't think I should be faulted if I don't have anyone to watch him. I feel like it was highly suggested that I go = expected to be there. Nobody else has ever watched him, except for my mom and his babysitter. My sister has two little ones herself - her house is NUTSO! I don't want to add another little one into the mix.

    Whatever - just kind of frustrating.

    Beth
     
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  3. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Why are teachers expected to attend PTO meetings on your non-contacted time? Yes, it's nice, but is it required?
     
  4. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    I have never heard of teachers being pressured to participate...why did he say this?
     
  5. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    Not required, just heavily suggested. Really, really, really suggested. Statements like, "I hope you all make plans to attend."

    Beth
     
  6. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    We are given the dates at the beginning of the year, and there are major repercussions if we miss a meeting.

    Is there a reason you can't bring him with you? I have a teammate who brings her 2 year old twins.
     
  7. Myrisophilist

    Myrisophilist Habitué

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    I don't think it's unreasonable for your principal to expect you to be at the meeting. Why couldn't you hire the babysitter?
     
  8. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    IDK, maybe I'm taking it wrong? He doesn't have kids, so I don't think he realizes how hard it is to juggle kids, especially when your SO doesn't have a traditional 8-5 job.

    Beth
     
  9. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    The babysitter is an in-home, and strictly 8-4.

    Beth
     
  10. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    Hmmm...I guess I could try? May not last too long, though. Lol. :lol:
     
  11. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Maven

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    Haha bring your 2 year old and tell them you couldn't find a sitter...I bet they won't demand that you attend the next meeting :D
     
  12. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    I would find it unreasonable.
     
  13. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    Lol, you've got a point! The PTO meetings are held in an empty classroom/large storage room. So, there are boxes, books on shelves, etc. Those things wouldn't be there too long!

    Beth
     
  14. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    I think it is IS unreasonable to expect all twenty, forty, sixty teachers in a school to attend the PTO meetins each month. Seems unnecassary. Then again, I think saying "I hope you all make plans to attend" isn't requiring attendance.

    Bring your child. :)
     
  15. 1st-yr-teacher

    1st-yr-teacher Comrade

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    We are expected to have one representative from each grade-level present at the PTO meetings.
     
  16. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    Yeah, maybe I am reading too much into it. It's almost the end of the year - my brain's tired, lol! :p

    Beth
     
  17. callmebob

    callmebob Enthusiast

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    Same as this for our school. It is up to the grade levels to decide who goes when as long as one person from each is there.
     
  18. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    We supposedly have a PTO, but I didn't hear a peep about it until my second or third year and that was just in passing. Haven't heard anything about it since, I don't believe.
     
  19. kpa1b2

    kpa1b2 Aficionado

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    We rotate who goes. It is expected that you go to 1-2 meetings per year. Doesn't matter when. We sign-up in advance.

    The perk for going is being able to wear jeans on the next Friday.
     
  20. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    I think it is extremely unreasonable. Teachers don't get paid to attend, so that's a burden. It's time away from family, so that's a burden. For teachers with children who need to shell out money for a sitter, that's a burden. It's unreasonable.
     
  21. Linguist92021

    Linguist92021 Phenom

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    I think there can be difference in the meaning based on the tone when some one says 'I hope you can attend'. It can be casual, or it can mean 'you need to attend'.
    why don't you let your P know that are planning to attend but running into difficulties with finding someone to watch your child. Then you'll know based on his response if it is a big deal, or he's flexible.

    If he says you must attend, bring your child :)
     
  22. bison

    bison Habitué

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    I would also bring your kiddo. If you want, you can let him know you don't have a sitter during that time and you'd need to bring your child if that's okay. Maybe he'll say not to go? From what I've seen around here, bringing kids is pretty common and many people do so.
     
  23. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    Thing is, he's 21 months old and not a big fan of sitting still and being quiet.

    Beth
     
  24. Mrs. Mom

    Mrs. Mom Cohort

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    Our PTO consists of about 5 teachers, the principal and his wife, the secretary, and about 3-5 other parents....on a good night.
    Definitely take your child....and hope they get a good dose of what a 2 year feels about having to attend a meeting at night! HA
     
  25. strepsils

    strepsils Companion

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    I would meet with your Principal and outline your concerns: your husband is working, your babysitter is unavailable and your mother is unavailable. Explain that you will continue to consider other avenues but you may need to bring your child with you - and if that is the best option, it may require you leaving early because it is not the best environment for a child that age at that time of night.

    Your Principal may appreciate you making the effort and understand why you are unable to go. They may also say, don't worry about it.
     
  26. SpecialPreskoo

    SpecialPreskoo Moderator

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    I wouldn't make excuses, just show up with your kid. :D
     
  27. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    Our meetings are mostly during the school day, only a few are at night. We are required to attend a few evening activities a year. If you had a major conflict, it is not technically required, but missing more than one a school year would cause you to be under the microscope and there is some pressure to attend them.
     
  28. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    Sure your P wants you there. P want you at every event known to mankind and who cares about your family. If you give in for every little thing for the P your family life will suffer. You can let your P know that you really want to help the school, but the PTO meeting isn't something that you can do right now--offer a different way to help the school. While I don't actually say the word "no" to my P--I am glad I have found ways to not attend all the lame functions out there. Not many get much lamer than PTO meetings. If I did attend every event, school would be my entire life, and my students would be no better off for it.
     
  29. DrivingPigeon

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    I think it is complete unreasonable to be expected to attend. You give to your students-their children-all day. You deserve to go home and be with your family and have a life.

    My old P used to say things like, "The PTO does so much for us, so it would be nice for you to attend the meetings." Well, I do so much for THEM and their children every single day. Sure, they might donate an $80 digital camera to our school (which I am very thankful for!), but I spent over $2,500 on my classroom this year, because my school can't provide me with the materials I need to teach!

    Sorry, but I think teachers are taken advantage of so often because we are a giving bunch. Sometimes we need to say to to extra-curricular activities. Especially if you have a family who needs you. Sure, it is just a few meetings here and there, but it could become more.
     
  30. bandnerdtx

    bandnerdtx Aficionado

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    I think expecting a teacher to regularly attend PTO meetings is unfair and unreasonable, but if you're feeling pressured the above advice seems the most professional way to handle it.
     
  31. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Showing up with the little one might actually work in your favor. The PTO members will see you as a parent as well as a teacher, and they may understand your need to balance work and home. It might be eye-opening for them.
     
  32. leighbball

    leighbball Virtuoso

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    Our school has a pta liaison and we have teachers sign up to do that. I used to do it, but that's when dh worked nights and we weren't married yet. We live 45 minutes away, so I don't attend meetings anymore, plus we have a 1 year old.
     
  33. Bella2010

    Bella2010 Habitué

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    That sounds about like ours. It's usually the principal, two PTO parents, and about five or six of teachers out of twenty.

    Beth
     

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