Just wonderin'.... I don't want to appear like I'm a slacker or overly emotional. But I'm wondering if I should share this news with my fellow teachers on my grade... I guess for support from them... idk I found out today that my fiance's grandfather, who I think of as my own Grandfather, is dieing of cancer. Doctor told him he can't have chemo and radiation will only keep him alive for a few months, tops. He decided to stop treatment and not even wear his back brace--- which means he has days to just a week or two to live. My fiance and his family are all in Michigan... I'm stuck in Jersey. I'm wondering if I could head over there for the funeral, but I'm wondering if that's allowable for new teachers. I don't want to lose this job at a private school because they think I'm over emotional about things. Secondly, I'm realizing my Dad's health isn't great either. Since I moved out this summer, he seems alot weaker when I go home. My Dad also has drinking problems, I'm starting to notice bruises (large ones) on his legs, which I know can be caused by liver damage due to drinking. But instead of talking to him about it, I'm terrified into silence. I've never been super close to my Dad, but we've been getting better lately. So I have two possible deaths on my mind--- morbid I know, but I'm starting to have really bad nightmares. It finally caught up to me when my Sweetheart told me there's nothing else Grandpa is going to try to do, he just wants to go home and relax and live with his daughter, son-in-law, wife, and two grand sons. I finally told my fiance about what I've been noticing about my Dad and now I haven't stopped crying since I got the phone call. Not even a hot shower has stopped the tears. Still, I have a set of notebooks to grade, two activities to plan, I have to write plans for Thurs and Friday since I have no clue what I'm doing.... and all I want to do is curl up into bed and sleep. Is it okay for new teachers to share what they're going through like this? I work in a friendly place, I'm just worried it might portray me poorly if I seem really crappy over the next few weeks. I'm going to try my best to suck it up and work hard for the kids, but if I'm like this every evening, I'll be a mess by the end of Sept.