Discussion in 'Elementary Education Archives' started by kmom, Feb 15, 2006.
Feb 16, 2006
Gee daisy, you think I have that type of disposition? I can't imagine why you think that!
This little one didn't get behind in a short time, so the solution will not be instant either.
I taught at a school who sent back students to the second grade if they were not retained because of no parental consent and should have been if those kids were having problems in third. As a third grade teacher at that school, I thought that was a wonderful decision in those certain cases. It's more beneficial to be retained in an early elementary grade IF retention is going to occur.
I've had students who were retained in second or put back in second because third grade was too much for them, and every student I've had with those circumstances has been successful in third and I whole-heartedly believe they would not have been had they been thrown in third. All of my students had been tested for special programs and had not qualified. I think it's important to test for learning disabilities, add, adhd, dyslexia, irlen syndrome, etc. and so on before retention, but sometimes it is the best thing for the child.
I think it would be a good idea to have you child go through and evaluation. For the following reasons:learning delay, development delay, scheduling etc.... If this is the cause it is not the end of the world, but you will be offered assistance in the particular areas if needed or it will become very obvious if he just needs more time.
There is no big deal in being held back a grade. How many of us really remember elementary school unless something horrific happens. When you go for an interview no one ask," did you do well in elementary school."
You are doing your best! You can request at the school an IEP (Individual Education Plan) this is a team meeting where the school educators will attend to discuss and evaluate your childs needs and if he needs additional assistance and what they can do to help. This will also allow you to see it from a different prospective with those who have seen your child.
More importantly, relax the anxiety is not going to help you or him. Here are also some tips for the following grades that I did with my son, who had similar description. I would get the curriculum for the next grade up and introduce the books in the summer so he had a chance to be exposed to the materials.
Keep being involved it will pay off in the end.
Before requesting and IEP, I would check to see if your child will qualify for an IEP. I know at my school, a student would not get an IEP unless something shows up on the standardized tests or if he/she is seen by a Resource Teacher.
Does your school have Resource Teachers?
It is so hard to know the right thing to do.
I don't think you said if the current teacher is specifically suggesting retention. IS she, or is that just what you fear will happen at this point? Since the current teacher mentioned summer school, does that mean she is saying that he may be able to catch up and she isn't recommending retention if he take summer school?
Sometimes the final decision on retention is held off for more info...such as possible testing for learning disabilities (testing done by the school) or summer school, or results on the standardized testing (our state tests every grade).
If they are recommending testing, they may be checking to see if he will qualify for a special program. I have a student this year (2nd grade) who is struggling. With this particular student, I have my doubts as to whether another year in 2nd will help. He is going through the testing process. My hope is that he will qualify to be placed in some special classes next year and we can avoid retention. On the other hand...I have had/seen students who were immature and/or simply lacked the background knowledge needed and another year of 2nd grade instruction would be just what they need.
Has the teacher talked about his maturity level? Since he came from a school that, by your own description, isn't as academically advanced as the school he is in now, he may very well be missing some of the basics. He COULD make some of this up in summer school and then the final decision on retention could be made after his summer school teacher makes a recommendation.
Someone mentioned that schools are getting more reluctant to retain in k-2 because of the mandatory retention in 3rd grade if they don't pass the standardized tests. Be sure you find out about that and how it would affect him...Can he be retained 2x? I think most people would agree that IF a child is going to be retained, the younger the better. 1- less social impact and 2- more focus on the basics. BUT, if they are retained young and then have to be retained again due to testing, that can compound the issues.
The school where I work is considered to be academically advanced and we often have students who are new to the school who have to be brought up to speed or held back a year.
We were just discussing a student today who is new to our school. This student was making good grades at the last school, but is really struggling here. When you look at your sons old papers, don't look just at the grades, but look also at what he was working on.
From what I have seen, at the 2nd grade level, the other kids aren't at all concerned that another student in the room has been retained. This age group just isn't into differentiating between kids that have been held back...kids that go to special classes, etc. I don't know how it impacts them socially in later grades, but on the plus side...having another year to mature, another year to really get a grasp on the basics, can be a true gift.
I know I am putting out some rather random thoughts here, but so much has been brought up...I just wanted to share my thoughts...random as they are ;-)
Get out of my head! I'm already there. I had planned on doing this before he got into the second grade but got lazy and figured he'd do fine. Boy do I regret that decision. I bought some books from a teacher supply store called Lakeshore. In fact, I bought most of his Christmas gifts from there this past year. I did get him a tv (which has currently been taken out of his room) but that was the only non-educational toy he recieved from me.
I purchased some Spectrum Math, Phonics, Reading and Spelling 2nd and 3rd grade workbooks for my summer arsenal. I will be requesting the third grade curriculum before the year is out. I'm glad you brought that up!
His teacher has not recommended retention. She stated that he may not be ready for third grade assignments and I agree. He struggles sometimes on things he should have learned and mastered in first grade. I started to wonder if he was "passed" on to the second grade when he probably shouldn't have been.
I did not think about the positive affects retaining him could mean. Retaining to me ignites negative thoughts in my head. I see retaining as a failure on me and my son. I've never been taught that retaining is a good thing for any child.
The weekend here in Houston is forcasted to a be a cold and rainy one so I'll be in the house formulating my plan of action. Maybe you guys can give me some pointers on my quasi lesson plans.
A great place to start working with him is on the graded work he has brought home! Hopefully the teacher doesn't mark which answer is correct, so you can have him redo all the things he misses on the papers he brings home. Go over ALL the papers he brings home, review them with him......PRAISE him for the ones he got, PRAISE him for neat work, improvements, etc and work with him to redo any that he misses.
But remember, If he becomes frustrated OR you become frustrated...TAKE A BREAK! regroup, back up and try again.
He needs time to be a regular kid, too.
His teacher is so sweet bless her heart but she does exactly that with his work. She will mark where he should have answered and he figured this out and just bubbles in there. I never thought to ask her if she could just leave it blank but I think I will. Any assignments he misses, she sends them home in a Tuesday folder which was a nightmare for me initially because it was so full and she wanted it back the next day. Imagine getting home at 7 or 8 and having to correct 5-10 sheets of assignments and get him to understand them and have him in bed on time. It took him so long to do just one page! Not possible.
I bought a fairly cheap (around $80) copier for my home. I got it at Staples. It makes black and color copies. If you had a copier at home, you could just copy the homework to review when you had the time.
Please don't over load him. It sounds to me like there is a lot more to this than your work/school schedule in the past. If he has to come home from school and do a lot of homework and if he has to spend his weekends doing homework, he just might end up hating school altogether. My suggestion to you would be to read to him...a lot...and throw in a specific skill now and then...but to sit him down and go over worksheets? No , I would not recommend that.
Oct 13, 2015
I realize that kmom's initial post was in 2006, and I hope she was able to resolve her problem. I'd like to add that Homeschooling is a wonderful option. Don't let anyone try to convince you that socialization is a problem - on the contrary, homeschooled kids are FAR better socialized than most public schooled kids. My older daughter was painfully shy, but I worked on that, and she became highly social. And end-of-the-year standardized test scores are through the roof in comparison to the national public schooled children.
I am an educator and I homeschooled both of my daughters. They speak multiple languages, tested at college-level from the beginning of junior high, and are both headed off to be human rights lawyers (one is finishing college this year, while the other is finishing high school this year). I taught for 2 hours a day, then used the rest of the time to go kayaking, visit museums, join sports teams, oil painting classes, dance, horse-back riding, foreign language classes, etc. I taught them Master's level geography at the age of 7, as well as college level art history, algebra and geometry...I was a single parent for most of it, and had VERY little money.
I worked a job and got a second college degree while I homeschooled. When each daughter turned 14, they got a part time job, saved their money, and traveled to Asia and Europe. Homeschooling is an exciting option that strengthens the bond between parent and child. And Ivy League schools are actively recruiting homeschoolers.
Oct 18, 2015
Maybe this post should be a separate thread? The OP's kid is presumably in 11th grade now! And it didn't seem the OP was in a position to homeschool.
Yes, czacza, I realize the OP's child is now in 11th grade (as reflected in my very first sentence). All of our posts are not only directed at the OP, but are an attempt to share with every parent in the forum. If my response was helpful to anyone else in a similar predicament, then it was worthy as a post.
Anyone can homeschool. Money, time, assistance - none of those were available to me when I started...I didn't even have a computer early on. In addition, both extended families were highly opposed to it. But I had enough confidence in myself to make it work...and I did. I should also mention that both sets of grandparents are immensely proud now, and based on my success, two of my three brothers have pulled their children out of school and are homeschooling them as well. Homeschooling can be more challenging for some families than others - that is very true. But if a parent is interested in it, there is FAR more help available today than there was in years past.
Again, I hope the OP and her child found a successful solution. I could identify with her frustration - I have privately tutored dozens of children who went to public school and still needed help from a private tutor.
Sharing 'with every parent on the forum' might be better achieved in a new thread....just my two cents. Glad your homeschool experience was successful!