Santa Claus?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by kcjo13, Oct 20, 2009.

  1. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

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    Oct 20, 2009

    Parents, this is for you:

    When did your children stop believing in Santa? And how did they find out?

    I'm a big Santa person, but lately my oldest daughter, who is 8 and in the third grade, has been doubting. Today, on the ride home, she was kinda talking to herself, and I heard her say "That's how I can prove it!" So I ask what she's talking about, and she tells me she has a plan for finding out, but she won't tell me. Of course, I pull out the "he's real if you believe he's real", but she looks at me like :confused:. She is a very down to earth, proof-is-in-the-pudding kind of kid, so I'm worried this could be it.

    Another problem-we also have a 4 year old. How do I handle that? Older dd is not mean intentionally, but she is very into the truth, laying it on the line, and not mincing words. She won't be into keeping it a secret for her sister. Advice?
     
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  3. TeacherShelly

    TeacherShelly Aficionado

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    KCJO, my girls figured it out awhile ago but finally made me come clean this year. They are 7. DD1 saw the grownups hiding Easter eggs one year and told me later, "It's ok, mom, I know the Easter Bunny is really you parents." I went ahead and told her that the parents just HELP the Easter Bunny, but she looked unconvinced. Then she developed a big fear of being watched, followed by being creeped out by the idea of the tooth fairy coming to her bed and exchanging her tooth for a quarter. She was really scared of that and did NOT want to put her tooth under her pillow.

    Finally I could see I was dealing with a realist and asked her, Would you feel better if Santa and the Tooth Fairy were not real? And she said YES!! So I told her that adults like me wanted her to believe because it is only in childhood that magical things seem so real. I told her I never believed in any of those things (my parents refused to lie to me - their words!) and I wanted her to have the magic for a few years. She said she was glad no one was watching her (Santa) and no one would be coming to her room while she slept. Looking back, she NEVER sat on Santa's lap and actually hid from him while her sister sat on him. I wonder if she thought he'd recognize her and be mad at her?

    Both girls know now, and are pretty proud to be "in" on the secret. They know they must let the other kids in school's parents decide when to tell their kids.

    The Monday after our talk, DD2 went to her teacher and said, "I know a BIG secret!" and proceeded to whisper in her ear, "The tooth fairy and Santa Claus are REALLY just the parents!!" Big grin and knowing eyebrow up.
     
  4. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

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    Aw, Shelly, that is so cute! That pretty much sums it up for me. She is just not one to fall for things! I just don't know what to do from here...I'm thinking I just let her come to me. I wouldn't say she is bothered by the thought of Santa, more like obsessed with the truth.

    On the upside, I've never had to deal with the tooth fairy-every tooth she's lost, she has swallowed! Except for ones that were pulled...those we just put in a drawer, and she never really mentioned it.
     
  5. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    I explain to the kids that believing in Santa is part of the magic of Christmas. And, when they know that Santa is really the parents, it is up to them to help keep Christmas magical for all the other children. The responsibility is usually enough to keep the secret.
     
  6. sue35

    sue35 Habitué

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    I was exactly like Shelly's kids. Santa just didn't make sense, how did he get to all the kids in one night? It really bothered me so I was relieved when I found out he wasn't real. I was told that I couldn't tell anyone else. I even had to hide it from my mom because she gets so into Christmas and wanted me to believe!
     
  7. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    Not a parent, but I remember.

    I started doubting in 2nd grade, but my situation was a bit different. We were very poor growing up (well, after my parents split when I was 5). The first few years my parents were divorced, my mom made less than $15K a year. My aunt and grandparents helped a lot :) Anyway, I KNEW we were poor (because I used to have a stay-at-home mom and all kinds of new clothes and toys and now I just hand my cousin's hand-me-downs). Anway, I started doubting in 2nd grade. But, I continued believing because I knew there was no way my mom could afford all of those presents.
    In 4th grade, I finally asked. My mom told me the truth. I told her I had wondered for a while, but did not understand how she had the money for the presents. I was told not to worry about it.
    I have a sister who is 5 years younger than me ( for those doing the math, my parents split when she was 6 weeks old). I never told her. My mom told me not to. She did find out before I did, but from someone at school. She was in 2nd or 3rd grade.

    That seems to be the age!
     
  8. flyingmickey

    flyingmickey Rookie

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    My DS 14, still 'believes' since only those who believe in Santa get a gift from him.

    I think he actually believed until her was about 9. He has kept the secret from his sister. My DD 11, hasn't said anything so we all just act like she still believes.
     
  9. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

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    I'm not sure my older son ever believed in Santa Claus. I never really did. Even as a child, it's not hard to figure out that flying reindeer, visiting every house on Earth in one night, carrying multiple toys for every child, and all the attendant mythology is just way too far-fetched to be reality. However, I did pretend I believed so as not to upset my parents.

    With the tooth fairy, my son changed it because he knew fairies weren't real: he made it the tooth tarantula. He thought the image of a tarantula running around with human teeth in its mouth, frantically collecting more, was hilarious. Obviously, though, he never really believed that -- imagine the horror of a child if they truly thought a hairy, toothy tarantula were going to sneak under their pillow while they were sleeping!

    My middle son's kind of flaky and loves all sorts of stories, so it's hard to know whether he actually believes. He won't even give a straight answer on whether Spiderman or Iron Man actually exist.
     
  10. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    I love the Tooth Tarantula! My grade 7 and 8s could write some marvelous stories!
     
  11. mrachelle87

    mrachelle87 Fanatic

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    My 16 year old claims to still believe because he told my mom, "When you don't believe he won't come anymore." So he tells everyone that he believes. His 7 year old sister knows better, but he told her last year..."Pretend to believe for mom, and if you say he doesn't exist mom won't let him come."
     
  12. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    I'm not a parent, but I believe when I was in 2nd grade, a boy in my class said there was no SC & at the time, I still believed there was, so me & some other kids who still believed were saying, "Yes there is."

    I remember telling my parents what the boy said that day, but I don't remember the specifics of how my parents ended up telling me. They either agreed & had no choice but to tell me the truth then & there I think.

    yeah, it's tough when the older kids know already, but the younger siblings still don't know & the parents don't want to ruin it for them. I don't know how parents handle that situation. I guess parents have to make sure the older kids don't spill the beans in front of the younger siblings.
     
  13. stephenpe

    stephenpe Connoisseur

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    Oct 21, 2009

    I still hear the bell;) and I still believe in Santa Claus.
    When I was almost 6 I head something going on in
    the front room. Being a achild of the night I started checking the
    house. EVERYONE (parents included) was sleeping. Then
    I checked the living room and the deed had been done. Convinced
    me then there was magic. Then I watch Miracle on 34th St every year and it is a no brainer for me. When little kids ask me or tell me about Santa or his existance I tell them about my experience at
    6 years of age.
     
  14. amakaye

    amakaye Enthusiast

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    My parents told me when I was in 3rd grade--I was the youngest in my class and got picked on sometimes, and they didn't want other kids to have more ammunition. I remember the day--my mom told me, and then took me to buy Easter candy for our baskets. While we were gone, my little sister went in my room and undid my American Girl doll's beautiful braids. (It was a very traumatic day :) ) I remember that year at Christmas laying awake and hoping they were wrong. My brother came to me soon after and asked me. We both enjoyed keeping it from my little sister for a few more years--especially when we got to stay up late and help put the presents under the tree!
     
  15. glen

    glen Companion

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    My younger son never believed, but didn't really say anything until recently (he's almost 15). I always knew he didn't buy the story.

    My older son was 9 when he asked me flat out in the Home Depot parking lot if there was a Santa. He figured it out because of the Giving Tree at church. He couldn't understand why a child would need us to buy crayons and coloring books when Santa was supposed to bring everyone gifts. At that point, I had to tell him the truth. I explained to him that Santa isn't exactly a lie- when we take a name off the tree and buy a child gifts, we are that child's Santa. The man in the red suit is just a symbol for all of the Santas in the world that make a child on Christmas. He understood pefectly.
     
  16. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    Oct 21, 2009

    I agree with letting her help, she can shop for Santa presents and stay up to put them out. Being in on the secret might help her want to keep it longer.

    I have the best story of finding out. I was another kid who never fully believed and at 5 I was spending the night with my grandmother (to go to church the next day) and said "Grandma, I want you to tell me the REAL truth - is Santa really real"? She told me of couse he was and I thought about that and said "Grandma, I already know he isn't REALLY REALLY real and Jesus would not want you to lie about it". :eek: Really, what could she say to that?!? She explained it to me and then had to tell my parents who were very upset. :lol
     
  17. kimrandy1

    kimrandy1 Enthusiast

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    I have an 11 year old who still believes.....and I love it that way.
     
  18. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    We broke down and told my 11 year old son over the summer. We didn't want him to be the only kid in middle school who still believed.

    He said he kind of knew already; it simply didn't add up.

    Now he's looking forward to helping us out! And he's determined to help keep the mystery alive for his 2 sisters.

    Have I mentioned lately what a great kid I have???
     
  19. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    I figured it out when I was about 9 based on what I knew about the laws of physics, the size of the earth, and the my estimate as to the number of children in the world. I also knew that many countries defended their airspace and the likelihood of Santa being taken out by as SAM or greased by a sniper in Vietnam was rather great.

    However, I don't recall ever being at all troubled by the concept of flying reindeer.
     
  20. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    I think that Brian pretty much knew a few years ago, until he was derailed by my husband :)

    It was Christmas Eve, and the girls were out cold. Brian was SO excited that he simply could NOT fall asleep.

    Finally, at about 1 am, Peter told me to go ahead and get the stuff out (I hide it, so I knew where it was!) and he would go lie down with Brian and keep him from coming downstairs.

    At one point, I dropped a gift. (Hey, it was late, and it was luggage!) Brian jumped up, so Peter pointed out the window and exclaimed " Did you hear that???Look, it's Santa leaving our house!!! Did you see Rudolph's nose?? Did you?????"

    Poor Brian was so tired and so excited that he was absolutely positive that he had seen and heard Santa. So we got another year or so out of him :)
     
  21. Major

    Major Connoisseur

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    I only believe in Mrs. Claus....... She provides everything I need every day of the year....
     
  22. silverspoon65

    silverspoon65 Enthusiast

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    I believed until I was 10. I was old enough then to get the spirit of Santa Claus and thus never really stopped believing.

    To this day, I will not help my mom carry the presents downstairs to the tree or load the stockings. There is something I LOVE about going down in the morning and seeing all the presents under the tree.
     
  23. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    I didn't read all the responses but I'm adding my story anyways.

    One year my middle child (about 8ish) came to me and said, "is Santa Claus real?" I asked him what he thought. He said he didn't think that he was real. I asked him why he felt that way. I don't remember what he said but it was very logical and I felt foolish to lie so I simply said, you are right. Then because we have a younger son, I told him that Christmas is about the magic of the season. I told him the history of Santa Claus (had to look it up to be certain of it) and what Christmas stood for (in the religious sense and the sense of St. Nicholas). I explained that it is really a magical time to believe when we are young so I asked him not to spoil it for his younger brother. I told him he will soon know the truth but in the meantime, in the spirit that the season brings, be nice and let him believe. As far as I was aware, he did just that. Those might not have been my exact words, but the sentiment of what I was trying to explain to him at that time is still there.

    The ironic part is my oldest child came up to me the next Christmas season and said, "mom, I think insert middle son's name, still believes. He told me he does." I have no idea if he just forgot, or if he was taking what I said seriously and letting those around him believe.
     
  24. Kase

    Kase Companion

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    I stopped believing in 3rd grade but it was because one of the boys on the school bus I rode told me. He pretty much made my day poopy. My mom eventually told me and explained everything to me that night.
     
  25. Liljag

    Liljag Companion

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    Oct 21, 2009

    Anyone ever been/heard of to Santa Claus's office? Actually it is quite a big thing up here and more than 20000 people per year fly in from all over the world during the Christmas season to see it..always wanted to see it myself. But it is open year round.

    http://www.santaclauslive.com/main.php?kieli=eng
    http://www.santaclausvillage.info/

    Regarding Santa..I don't tell anyone if I believe or not. He's always listening so they say..and I would hate to be on his bad side :)
     

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