Ready to quit after one week

Discussion in 'Preschool' started by freespirit71, Sep 10, 2016.

  1. freespirit71

    freespirit71 New Member

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    Sep 10, 2016

    Hello. I just took a position as administrator / head teacher at a preschool this year after being out of education for about 10 years. I took time off to raise my kids. I had previously taught second grade full time.

    The preschool I am in now is through my church, and we are touted as being a "Christian" preschool. I have a deep abiding faith and come from a family of "salt-of-the-earth, Christian" people. However, we are pretty quiet, private and reserved about what "great Christians we are". I just met and started working with my aide this week. She is in charge of a half hour of Bible teaching for each class plus helping out with the class in general. She is about 10 years older than me and has been with the preschool for about 10 years. (I am 40+. She is 50+) Although I appreciate her help in "showing me the ropes" and teaching me the basic routines and songs from previous years, I do not appreciate her constantly trying to "one up" me on what a great Christian she is or being overbearing and pushy.

    She talks "down" to me but is passive-aggressive enough about it so as to not be obvious. For example, on the first day of class, I missed getting a couple of students' pictures taken with the "First Day of Preschool" sign. When I went to get their pictures the next day with the sign, she got upset that I forgot to change the sign to "2nd day of Preschool" and said that "if I called myself a Christian, I wouldn't want to "lie" about it being the 1st day of preschool when it was really the 2nd." She also told me that one time last year when the public librarian came in to do a project with the kids, she felt the librarian's project wasn't Christian enough so she shamed the librarian in front of the kids and offended her in the name of "Christianity". Unbeknownst to her, the librarian is a friend of mine, and I was offended that she hurt my friend like that (although I didn't say so).

    In just one week, there have been daily incidences like this. I feel as though I am under constant scrutiny by her to live up to her "religious fanaticism". When I got hired, I had heard from several people that she would try to come off as "the perfect Christian" and would try to cram her religious beliefs down my throat. I usually do not have trouble getting along with people. I am easy-going, flexible and happy-go-lucky in general. Last night, I started Googling her name just to try to find some "dirt" on her so I could at least know something bad about her to keep in the back of my mind when she starts in on her religious diatribe. Obviously, if I am feeling like this after only one week of school, this is not going to end well. She is good with the kids and good at teaching them about the Bible, but she needs to stop with her phony "perfect Christian" performance. (People like her are the ones who turn people away from church in general in my opinion but I digress....) I don't know how I will get through the year like this if it is this bad after one week. I was so excited about this job, and many people in my church support me. I went into this position thinking it would be long-term, and that I would stay for at least 5 years. I don't want to let anyone down.

    Any thoughts or suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you.
     
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  3. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Sep 10, 2016

    Do your administrative responsibilities include supervising and evaluating her?
     
  4. Linguist92021

    Linguist92021 Phenom

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    Sep 10, 2016

    I would somehow, in a diplomatic, but firm way, let her know, that I am Christian enough, and as I'm not trying to change her into something she's not, she shouldn't do it to me. Also I'd let her know that she needs to be more professional, and stop with the condescending comments, and definitely not try to put me down in front of children or staff. Do this in the sense of 'we work together, let's try to get along'. If you have evaluating powers over her, as you might, since she's your aide and you're a teacher, your word would have more weight, I would be a little more firm about everything, in a way that telling her this once should be enough, and there should be no more incidences nor follow ups.

    Maybe no one ever told her how awful she is, so you just need to step up and educate her :) she might change completely and your work relationship could greatly improve.
     
    MsAbeja likes this.
  5. freespirit71

    freespirit71 New Member

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    Sep 11, 2016

    Thank you so much for your responses. Honestly, Caesar753, I don't know if my administrative duties include supervising and evaluating her. :oops: I guess I should look into that. I would think my boss would have mentioned that at some point though. Linguist92021, you sound like my husband. ;) He basically said the same thing you did. I laughed when you said "Maybe no one ever told her how awful she is, so you just need to step up and educate her". That was awesome. lol Thanks for giving me ideas to consider, and thanks for listening. :) I was very upset yesterday, and I still am. :pensive:.
     
  6. ChildWhisperer

    ChildWhisperer Groupie

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    Sep 18, 2016

    If she was a true Christian, she would not put others down and act superior to everyone else. She just wants power but can't have it.
    You're not just the teacher, you're also an administrator, so you should definitely have a lot more power over her.
     
  7. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Sep 18, 2016

    Don't look up dirt on her. That's beneath you. You need to sit down with her and tell her that while you appreciate her years of experience with the school, you need her to step back a bit when it comes to giving unsolicited advice in the classroom. I would definitely mention that you personally know the librarian whom she reprimanded and remind her that you were taken aback by those comments, especially on the Christian based climate in which you work. I'd tell her that you won't judge her on what had transpired thus far and that in order to continue in a positive manner for both your working relationship and for the benefit of the children, you'd advise that she do the same in terms of not judging you, your teaching, or others.
     
    Last edited: Sep 18, 2016

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