I am faced with a very hard choice. Please help me decide. Background: This is my first year teaching. I've worked with kids for five years, but this is my first year having a class all to myself. I have a particular child in my classroom who has been extremely difficult since day one. He's been in school for 5 months, and let me tell you, it's not been easy. I love my students and I can't ask for a better class/group of children except for this child. He is messy, mean, and has extreme behavioral problems. He often hits other students and when he is asked to use his words or apologize, he ignores any eye contact and refuses to talk. He intentionally runs his bike into other children and when I call him on it, he would ignore me and continues on. When I stop his bike to "have a talk" he would be silent. If I ask him to get off his bike, he refuses and me and my instructional aid would always have to literally pick him off the bike. Then one of us would have to hold onto him so that he doesn't climb back on the bike. There is constant power struggle and it's been draining on both me and my aid. I have parent volunteers in the class and all of them refuse to talk or work with him because of his behaviors. When he eats, he is so animalistic. Sandwiches are torn into tiny pieces with crumbs everywhere. Milk and cereal get splashed and spilledall over the carpet. He refuses to help us clean up and when we ask him to use a paper towel to wipe his face, he throws the towel back to us. I've taken away his previledges. For example, he can't go outside to play until he cleans up. He would then run out and my aid would drag him back in. He'd run out again, and we'd BOTH have to drag him in; constant power struggle. I've given him cookies and toys for his positive behaviors (ie: singing with the group or participating). However, it rarely happens and he hasn't improved at all. I've tried all the suggestions veteran teachers gave me. I've had three veteran teachers come in to observe him and they've all told me he has behavioral problems. I've met with the parents 5 times to discuss a behavioral plan. We came up with a schedule (which I don't think he has at home) and list of rules and consequences. Both parents said they would be consistent and enforce the plan at home, but I don't think they are. I honestly feel the parents are the problem. I have been told by his neighbors and family members (who attend the same class) that there is no structure at home. He is not neglected from what I've seen during home visits. The parents just let him do whatever he wants and let him get away with anything. When I asked them what they'd do when he misbehaves, they looked at each other. I've given them ideas and techniques to work with him, but it's been 3 months and I've not seen any changes in his behaviors. My superivisor came in to observe him for one week. She also feels his is disruptive and has behavioral problems. She told me it is up to me to drop him. He's been assessed by special education teachers to make sure it's not a learning disability. Again, I really believe it's his homelife that's affecting him. I am not sure what I should do. It is my first year teaching and I feel like maybe I could have done something. I feel like I've failed this child. He can be happy and on the rare days when he is "good", I just feel extremely rewarded. However, his behaviors also scare me, my aid, and parent volunteer. He intentionally hits others and would SMILE, yes, smile when they cry. He gets into a power struggle and wants to do whatever he wants. If someone stops him, he becomes stubborn and tries to do whatever he could to get what he wants (ie: continuously grabbing for a toy even when it is out of reach). I've had to pick him up and remove him from our music time because he wanted to pull at other kids' legs and trip them. My aid or a parent volunteer had to hold him down and stop him from running back to the carpet. Again, this could happen 2-3 times out of the 4 days we're in school. I have control of my students and I think I have good classroom management. My class runs pretty smoothly except for when this child acts out. Is it me? Is there anything I can do? I've asked other teachers, tried what they suggested. I've been told to drop this child. Did I fail him? I am so sad right now.