Planning a Memorial

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out Archives' started by Grammy Teacher, Nov 16, 2006.

  1. Grammy Teacher

    Grammy Teacher Virtuoso

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    Nov 16, 2006

    I have never done this. My father in law passed away and I am in charge of planning the memorial. I have ideas, but I am looking for suggestions to add to what I already know. We are not having it in a traditional funeral home, so I will be doing all of the details that they would normally do. We are having the food catered. I have asked for photos from my mother in law and any awards, etc. Where do I buy a guest book? What should I use for the cards and money??? Help!!! I am thinking of getting a few green plants for the tables, some poetry for the tables, what else should I do??
     
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  3. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    Nov 16, 2006

    Are there things he likes? Memories people remember fondly? Use those ideas to be creative. If he likes certain music, have it piped in. If he likes sports, have a few subtle decorations or even a cherished momento. Will anyone say anything on his behalf? Can someone make a poem that says the essence of who he is? Are there any hidden talents in the family (I tend to be asked to do a signed song service). Did he express personal wishes to anyone? I know my husband wants something military style becuase he served some time. My dad wants to be creamated in a mayo jar (southern thing) and put in the seat of his first pick up truck which still sits on the family farm (rusted of course). Maybe instead of just a guest book you can have a "WHat I remember about _______" card and ask people to write a quick memory and post it to a wall for all to read. Then later when the time is appropriate, make a scrapbook, or organize it and copy it into a small book to give to certain family members. You could even have an address sign up book if people would like a copy of this typed and emailed or mailed to them (not the formal scrapbook). This list will help send thank you cards too.

    Hope some of those help jog some creativity. It's hard when all you want to do is be in the moment of mourning.
     
  4. Grammy Teacher

    Grammy Teacher Virtuoso

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    Nov 16, 2006

    Hi DeafSmart...Thanks for responding. I like the idea of a poem. You mentioned doing a card of "What I Remember." I was thinking of something similar, index cards in a basket and everyone can write a memory on them. Our youngest son has offered to help with music(that is his talent.)
     
  5. deedee

    deedee Connoisseur

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    Nov 16, 2006

    we just had a death in the family a few weeks ago and i scanned all the pics into the computer and added them to a power point with music he loved, frank sinatra ....it turned out really nice ...they had a big screen tv so everyone to see it.
     
  6. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    Nov 16, 2006

    So sorry about your father-in-law, Grammy. The powerpoint idea is a nice one, this was done at a memorial for the mother of one of my duaghter's friends last year. Putting together photos and other momentos in collage frames also works really well and provides something for people to look at. You should be able to purchase a guest book at any stationary store, and a large basket (perhaps with some of his favourite flowers or ribbon in his favourite team colours tied to the handle) for the cards.
     
  7. kinderkids

    kinderkids Virtuoso

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    Nov 16, 2006

    Grammy, no ideas, just wanted to pass along my sympathies to you and your husband and kids. :(
     
  8. MissFrizzle

    MissFrizzle Virtuoso

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    Nov 16, 2006

    Grammy, My sympathy on your loss.

    I agree with making a powerpoint presentation with music. I also like the idea of green plants at the tables. The important thing to remember is to do what ever you feel comfortable with and what ever you feel most appropriate. Perhaps a guest book can be bought at a catholic supply store... if not, there are plenty of journal type books to use that are beautiful and touching.
     
  9. Grammy Teacher

    Grammy Teacher Virtuoso

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    Nov 16, 2006

    Thanks everyone. I have a couple of weeks to plan(thank goodness.) Our youngest son will take care of the music part of it...and he is helping me plan other things as well. I appreciate all of your input...great helpers you are! I like the basket idea with a ribbon(probably Green Bay Packers colors,) for the cards. That will work just fine.
     
  10. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Nov 17, 2006

    Sorry for your loss...we planned my grampa's this year and a few months later a grandma on the other side.
    My suggestions- I did a powerpoint in 3 days and it turned out GREAT everyone loved it.
    -I wouldn't worry about a lot of green plants since you do get a lot of plants & flowers (usually).
    -The guest book you could probably ask your local funeral home, they may just sell them.
    -My gram kept a list of memorial money, food that was brought, people who said things, & plants so she could send appropriate thank you cards.
    -My Grampa was an avid golfer & fisherman so we did have a golf club & rod propped on the outside of the casket.
    -We actually took time at my grandma's memorial (not traditional) to write down something we remembered.
    -As far as the money you get is their a charity or something your father in law would have wanted you to do with it. My grampa & gram had seperate bank accounts and she spent "his" money on buying something from "him" for each of us. Maybe something like that.
    -My sister brought a couple of the flowers from both memorials back to get this done...I don't know if you want to check it out, but they turned out BEAUTIFUL!!! http://www.houseofcrystalinc.com/index2.ivnu

    Good Luck!!!
     
  11. ABall

    ABall Fanatic

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    Nov 17, 2006

    my uncle put together the best slide show put together with music for my grandmother. We had the memorial for her at a church in the town where she wanted he ashes burried. So there was tables set up at angles and so every one could view the blank spot on the wall where the slide show was set up, then people that were close said a few things they wanted to share about good memories etc... then we had a little bit to eat and visited family we wouldn't see other wise (since for us it was out of town). There was a large picture of her before you entered the room. The only things we had on the tables were boxes of klenex. and maybe a little sheet printed up with her name, day she was born, day died, and living realatives and a little verse from the bible.
     
  12. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    Nov 17, 2006

    I still like the idea of having a post board for them to put up their index card memories. It's nice to read and remember those memories. Everybody has different type of memories.
     
  13. JenPooh

    JenPooh Virtuoso

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    Nov 17, 2006

    I can't help you out Grammy but wanted to tell you I am sorry for your lose.
     

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