People asking about personal finances....

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by ecteach, Jul 20, 2014.

  1. ecteach

    ecteach Devotee

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    Jul 20, 2014

    We recently bought a house. YAY!! We are in our early 30's, and it was time.

    Since I bought the house I have had several people ask me what my house payment is per month. These people are more than acquaintances, but not best friends of mine. I've also had people ask me how much I put down. I am always taken aback by this, and normally I will just tell them. But, I really don't think it's anyone's business. My husband said he's had several people ask him too, and it doesn't bother him to tell them.

    I bought a car 2 years ago, and I had the same issue with people asking my car payment. My parents don't even ask how much I spend on stuff. Who are these people to ask?

    Am I weird? Maybe it's just the way I was raised. I just think it's highly rude and invasive. The funny thing is....none of my best friends or family members have even asked me.
     
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  3. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    That's weird. Are these people looking to buy a house also? Maybe they are curious to see if they could afford it themselves. Otherwise it's just really nosy....and weird.
     
  4. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Jul 20, 2014

    A good response to such questions is 'why do you ask?' :rolleyes:
     
  5. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    I don't have that close of friends (since my younger adulthood) to ask me those kinds of personal questions, but people must be getting nosier & nosier these days & no, I don't think it's right. Even my few friends never ask me things like this. Remember, just because they ask, that doesn't mean you have to tell them. You can be smiling from ear to ear & still say, "Oh, I'd rather not say."
     
  6. dgpiaffeteach

    dgpiaffeteach Aficionado

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    The only person I've had ask was a friend who's looking to buy. I didn't mind it a bit. She was trying to get an idea and wanted real life stories. I'm open about my spending though. Everyone can find out what I make with a simple internet search. It doesn't bother me.

    I ask people questions about money sometimes. We've been doing a lot of work on the house. I ask people who have had similar things done and I ask what it cost them and if they would recommend their person.
     
  7. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    I tend to get asked those types of questions from friends who are interested in purchasing a home or who have just bought one. I don't mind answering.

    If it bugged me though, I'd just say something like, "Oh, we got a great deal!" or "Why do you ask?" Most people with any tact will take the hint and stop that line of questioning.
     
  8. teach1

    teach1 Companion

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    Jul 20, 2014

    I totally understand where you are coming from, and I tend not to ask unless I preface it with something like... "I hope this isn't stepping out of line, but I am in the market for a new _____ and would love to know if you found a good deal" or something.

    Having said that, I think some people just ask out of curiosity / making conversation. Things such as house prices and car payments are pretty much public knowledge, aren't they? In my area, everyone knows how much people are selling and buying houses for.
     
  9. Maryhf

    Maryhf Connoisseur

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    Jul 20, 2014

    I could be wrong, but my first thought is that the person asking watches a lot of House Hunters on TV and your story is just another episode to them. You don't have to tell.
     
  10. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    Jul 20, 2014

    I don't answer anything I'm not comfortable answering. However, there are a few people (family/close friends) who I don't mind giving info to (such as house payment/car payment).
     
  11. teach1

    teach1 Companion

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    :lol:
     
  12. waterfall

    waterfall Maven

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    People ask me all the time what my rent is, but I think that's because the rental market is so tight in our city that they're just looking for information. If I don't want to share for some reason, I just say, "Oh, it's pretty expensive!"

    Funny you brought up your parents- my dad is constantly asking stuff about how much things are and how much my salary is. I don't mind telling my own dad, but my mom thinks its so rude that he even asks.

    Congrats on your house!
     
  13. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

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    Jul 22, 2014

    I've also just bought a house -- the ones asking me the most have been my kids! I refuse to tell them because I know if I did the whole town would know inside a week (like when I'd been laid off for about 3 months and my kids told all their classmates:mad:).

    Technically, house sales are public information anyway and can be looked up on Zillow (though down payment can't).

    However, I would feel no compunctions about lying in such a situation. Or just telling them it wasn't their business.

    Congrats on the house!
     
  14. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Jul 23, 2014

    I've been asking a lot recently and for me it's to get an idea of how much "stuff" costs around here. I've been gone for three years and prices have really changed. I think my brother was upset the other day when I asked him how much he made at work, but my esposo is going into the same field so I want to know ballpark range what he could make. Same thing when we're buying cars or car insurance.

    If you're uncomfortable talking about it, then give one of the answers that other posters mentioned. But I honestly think that for most people it's to get an idea of prices in the area. Not to pry into your personal life.
     
  15. TamiJ

    TamiJ Virtuoso

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    Jul 23, 2014

    My guess is that those asking are interested in doing the same thing and trying to see if they would be able to do it. Honestly, it doesn´t seem odd, but I have lived in Mexico for 5 years and Mexicans always ask questions like that (even asking about salary...it´s just a cultural thing...they don´t seem to find it strange).
     
  16. DrivingPigeon

    DrivingPigeon Phenom

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    Jul 25, 2014

    I would never ask someone, but my husband does. He's super nosy, and has even asked his friends how much they make. He's a smart guy, so I'm surprised he does this. He doesn't really see anything wrong with it, but I always yell at him!
     
  17. WindyCityGal606

    WindyCityGal606 Enthusiast

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    :lol: Love House Hunters!!!
     
  18. StarsofTommorow

    StarsofTommorow Companion

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    Jul 29, 2014

    Unless it. Was like a parent...I wouldn't say anything. It is personal, rude, and not safe to talk about personal finances. Just tell that that it was a great deal and be very vague. Its YOUR money.
     
  19. Luv2TeachInTX

    Luv2TeachInTX Comrade

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    Jul 29, 2014

    I must be in the minority. Questions like that don't really bother me. I would just assume whoever it was is asking because they were curious about buying themselves. *shrug*
     

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