parents

Discussion in 'First Grade' started by Lynnnn725, Feb 11, 2009.

  1. Lynnnn725

    Lynnnn725 Connoisseur

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    Feb 11, 2009

    I work in a very affluent neighborhood. Many of our parents are very whiny and needy and demanding and ungrateful and unimpressed and {fill in any negative term here}.

    If you work in a low socioeconomical area, do you find your parents trust in you and are more grateful? Or do they still let you know how horrible you are and how there is something wrong with everything you do.

    sorry - just a vent.
     
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  3. Kinder Preppie

    Kinder Preppie Rookie

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    Feb 12, 2009

    I work in a small private school that is very expensive, elite and small. The parents definitely expect more and more and more.

    It does not matter how much I give and how advanced and well rounded their child is within my class, it is never enough. My kindergarteners could be doing Calculus, and they would wonder why it is not Calc II.

    Please do not feel alone in this. It would not matter what you accomplish - they would expect more.

    My students can read and comprehend Magic Treehouse in one day, they can do plenty of math, and can write stories beyond five sentences with questions, exclamations, periods - some can even use commas and semi colons... but still complaints...

    I even have parents who send in upper level things they have done at home with their children (which they have obviously almost done for the child themselves)

    It seems they have no idea that children can only retain so much before they start to lose the more important items....

    I have long since given up on trying to please them - I just teach and smile a lot.

    I certainly hope I have made you feel better... some people cannot be pleased.... and some are soooo appreciative. Teacher to teacher I appreciate you !!!!
     
  4. trayums

    trayums Enthusiast

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    Feb 12, 2009

    I too teach in a very affluent area. I am interested to hear what the responses are...
     
  5. aek471

    aek471 Rookie

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    Feb 12, 2009

    I have always taught in low income, and I do find that the parents tend to be more grateful and really defer to me on any educational decisions. Most of my parents are great, they are supportive and really easy to work with.

    But...there are always those that are just never happy. I've been told I have a bad attitude and I have no idea what I'm doing. But that is definitely the exception. Maybe I've just been lucky, but most of my parents are great!
     
  6. MissR

    MissR Comrade

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    Feb 12, 2009

    I am in a low income school and I have SOME great parents, some years I might have *a* parent that thinks I'm not doing enough for their child, but the majority of my parents don't communicate with me very much, and that also means I have NO parent volunteers (some years). Some parents I see MAYBE once a year, and I wouldn't be surprised to find out they don't even talk to their child that lives with them, because the kid never does homework, never studies for spelling, never reads at home...

    For the most part, whether I consider them "good" parents or not, they seem to trust me and appreciate me... even if I'm pretty sure some of them "appreciate" me as their child's babysitter for the day.
     
  7. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    Feb 12, 2009

    I'm going to echo what MissR said.

    We have problems with parents, just not the same kind of problems. You have problems with parents never thinking you're good enough, we have problems with totally absent parents and parents who just don't give a darn. You have problems with parents hoovering over you, we have problems getting parents to get anywhere within 500 feet of the school (though many times that's because they're too busy working 3 jobs to keep a roof over their child's head and keep him fed). I remember being so happy one day that I actually had a parent come in for a conference, that I really didn't care that she was dressed for work....as a stripper.

    People always tell me that they could never work in an inner city school...and I always retort back that I could never work anywhere else. I just couldn't deal with helicopter parents trying to dictate my every move. It boils down to this: there are problems in every situation. They might not be the same problems, but that doesn't make them any worse or better than problems somewhere else.
     
  8. Lynnnn725

    Lynnnn725 Connoisseur

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    Feb 13, 2009

    I totally agree.
     
  9. MissR

    MissR Comrade

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    Feb 13, 2009

    LOL, mmswm!
     
  10. DrivingPigeon

    DrivingPigeon Phenom

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    Feb 13, 2009

    I work in a pretty affluent neighborhood, but my parents are pretty grateful for the most part. I have too many volunteers, they showered me with gifts at Christmas time, and all of my students complete all assignments. I have one helicopter mom who drives me crazy, though!

    I do have a few parents that seem to think I'm never doing enough. One girl is reading at a level B, but her mom claims she can read chapter books alone at home, so she is complaining that the books I'm sending home from guided reading are too easy. I see the girl read them for the first time in class and they are right at her level. Another child is reading at a level M, and his parents are always questioning whether or not I'm doing enough with him. They are always telling him to tell me to send home more difficult work.

    I guess I consider myself lucky for the most part.
     
  11. love_reading

    love_reading Comrade

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    Feb 15, 2009

    You still get parents who do not believe in the school system. Mostly they think the school is always wrong and they deserve what they want. I also don't get many that will volunteer or able to donate items. I guess you don't win no matter what! lol
     
  12. horns#1

    horns#1 Rookie

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    Feb 17, 2009

    I work in a low socioeconomical school. I have a hard time with parent involvement. I occasionally have parents that are not happy with work but that will happen everywhere. For the most part though, they leave the educational decisions to us unless their child is failing. That seems to get the parents more involved than anything.
     
  13. cmgeorge626

    cmgeorge626 Companion

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    Feb 18, 2009

    I teach in a low SES area and we have parent problems because so many parents don't work and don't have anything better to do than cause problems at school!
     
  14. apple1

    apple1 Rookie

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    Feb 23, 2009

    When I worked in a low socioeconomic area the parents deferred all educational decisions to me and were very appreciative. Same goes for the students. They were greatful for any treat or gift I gave. I work in the opposite now and the student attitude is "IS THAT ALL?" and the parents think they run the show!
     
  15. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    Feb 23, 2009

    I think a lot of it has to do with the professionalism of the staff. If most of the staff is generally professional in dress, attitude, and the way they deal with parents it cuts down on parent problems. It also makes a big difference when the administration is supportive of the teachers and steps in to tell parents to back off as needed. As soon as a few teachers start to act unprofessionally and/or defer to parents when the parent/student is clearly wrong it snowballs. If the principal/AP aren't supportive and are the type to take a parent/student's word over the teacher you have a recipe for disaster. One of the reasons that I am so glad to work where I do is that the P/AP always let parents know that whatever decision the classroom teacher made is the one that is going to stick at the end of the day.
     
  16. Lynnnn725

    Lynnnn725 Connoisseur

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    Feb 23, 2009

    I totally agree. Good point.
     
  17. kellymouse

    kellymouse Rookie

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    Feb 25, 2009

    I work in a low SES school, after student teaching at a private school. Total opposites! We had tons of parents involvement when I was student teaching. Now I have 2 parents that volunteer, 1 that keeps in good contact with me to be sure her daughter is doing what she's supposed to, 3 or 4 that check in periodically through a note, 1 that refuses to accept that her child needs major help at home because she's just not getting it, at least 1 that I know is in jail, and the rest I have not once been able to get response from in any form (written, email, phone, in person-nothing!) Oh, except for the 1 parent who only contacts me when she feels I've done something horribly wrong. No worries that her kid still doesn't know her letters-let alone letter sounds-and she's more than halfway through first grade. I suppose it makes a difference that I've had 14 kids come and go from my classroom-I only have 10 kids who have been with me from the first day of school. It makes this really difficult when you have VERY little parent involvement in any way, and a new student coming and an old one leaving almost every week, if not more.
     
  18. uprekmom

    uprekmom Rookie

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    Feb 26, 2009

    Hello All

    I'm not a teacher, but a parent and I just wanted to give my opinion.

    As a parent whose child is in private school in an "urban" area, I find that there many parents that actually volunteer, assist and are pro-active in their children's roles and are not demanding or demeaning to the teachers. I try to volunteer when I can and always send gifts to teachers during the holidays, I know what a difficult job you have. I have one child and how you deal everyday with all those kids is amazing!


    I have friends who are teachers to the elite system and I hear stories of the way they are treated. They demand special attention to their child and want immediate responses.
     

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