Parents who dread school breaks

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by whizkid, Nov 19, 2018.

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  1. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Nov 24, 2018

    Let's keep things away from dangerous waters before we start getting ultra-judgmental. Personally, I'm a little worried for our more food-insecure students and their families during these breaks.
     
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  2. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    Me, too. Yes, there are deadbeats, but you also have good families trying their best where a day off of school, let alone a longer break, is a huge stressor. There is no funds for childcare during that time while they work, little to feed them, etc.
     
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  3. MissCeliaB

    MissCeliaB Aficionado

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    I am really excited to see my students today. The vast majority of our parents are trying their best. Long school breaks are stressful for them because our students get two meals and a heavy snack each day at school. Our attendance zone includes both the best and worst neighborhood in the school. About half of our kids live in areas where gun fire is common at all times of day. Those kids are so much safer at school than at home. Most of the parents work, or are disabled and can't work, or kids live with disable grandparents because parents are deployed or sometimes incarcerated. I have so much hope for my kids who are at school trying to do better. I also have so much empathy for their parents, who are trying the best that they can. The holidays are stressful enough without judgement from others.
     
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  4. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    The kids are lined up outside waiting for us to open the gates for breakfast. I got out of my car at 6:45 (yes, many of them get here that early to be first in line for breakfast). They seemed happier than normal to see me.

    Food insecurity is real! I’m thrilled they’re all back on a regular schedule where they’ll get two square meals a day.

    On a frustrating note, internet and email are down. I can access everything from my phone, thankfully, but I hate sitting at my desk with phone in hand.
     
    Last edited: Nov 26, 2018
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  5. whizkid

    whizkid Cohort

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    Some of us actually have lives and enjoy time off especially away from children. ;)
     
  6. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    -
    Why are you stirring the pot and making this personal? I suspect that mathmagic has a life too. Why would you suggest otherwise?
     
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  7. whizkid

    whizkid Cohort

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    Well, it's that time again. HALLELUUUUUUUUUUUUJAH! 4 1/2 days to freedom! A full 16 1/2 days of relaxation, food and fun, and the absolute best part..........no kids! None! I'm done with all of my shopping! I won't run the risk of seeing any of them around town! How sweet it is! Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock!

    You breed em, you feed em!
     
  8. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    I must say, many things people say on this anonymous public forum are offensive...but this statement probably ranks in the top 10...
     
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  9. TrademarkTer

    TrademarkTer Groupie

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    It's gotta be trolling...
     
  10. Ms. I

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    I agree. Parents should want to spend quality time and enjoy fun times w/ their children when at all possible. Life zips by fast. One day they're in pre-school, the next, they're graduating from college & it literally felt like just a few yrs.
     
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  11. whizkid

    whizkid Cohort

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    This is one weekend I want to just fly by!
     
  12. whizkid

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    Our Xmas program is this week, and when the principal makes the infamous phrase "we love your children, but they're all yours for two weeks", the disgust on the parents' faces will be apparent.

    These are the parents that catch you in the store and ask "you wanna take em home with ya"? How does it look for me to take your child home with ME? I mean, really? Nope, I'm going home to peace and quiet. I've had them for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week for the last semester. They're your problem now.
     
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  13. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Dec 16, 2018

    You do realize that most of those comments are made in jest???!!!
    If you hate the job so much, why don't you find a better paying job in another field?
     
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  14. whizkid

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    Don't even suggest me taking your child home.

    If you hate my comments so much, why respond? On another note since you love them so much, take them home with YOU!
     
  15. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    This discussion is in serious jeopardy of being locked.
     
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  16. 3Sons

    3Sons Connoisseur

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    Dec 17, 2018

    In case the point hasn't been made, a lot of parents "dread" breaks not because they dislike their children, but because it takes work to arrange vacation camps and figure out how to get them there. For summer, for instance, we typically start looking for our youngest son's baseball camp around now. That lasts three weeks, so then we have to find another camp or activity for the few days after school has ended before his camp starts, and then we have to find something after that in August, and sprinkle a some vacation in there ourselves when we can actually spend time with the kids. Our middle son did an academic program last year in the summer.

    The cost of these is also pretty extensive. We were very lucky to find the baseball camp for a bit over $500 per week, and then it was I think $150 for the time between and another $150 during August. Our middle son's program was in the neighborhood of $3500.

    Then there's also a matter of physically getting kids to these activities. It's kind of tough when they don't take kids before 8:30 and you work 40 minutes drive away starting at 9 am. Oh, and you're expected to pick them up at 3. There's a lot of jobs that don't really like you telling them you're going to leave at 2:15 every day in the summer.
     
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  17. whizkid

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    And a lot dread them because they do and want them to be someone else's problem, which is why they hate when there's no school.
     
  18. whizkid

    whizkid Cohort

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    Yea, I prefer Roth IRAs, brokerage accounts and savings.
     
  19. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    Last summer, I paid for my nephew to go to a baseball camp because he got really good grades. It was $2200 for 2 weeks! Yes, he learned a lot and enjoyed being taught by “famous baseball players” (guys from the local state university), but that was expensive!
     
  20. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    I can't imagine how hard it is to have to dole out extra funds during school breaks but apparently these parents didn't think about any of this before they had kids. I mean, this just didn't spring up on them...school breaks have been around forever. I guess having kids sounded fun and of course they are so cute when they are babies but they didn't think about what they would be responsible for? Just having them and then hoping someone else clothes, feeds, entertains them, etc.? I'm asking a legitimate question to all of those who have kids. Did any of these things occur to you before you had them? Did your parents make parenting look easier than it really was? Anyone have any input on this?
     
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  21. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Just speaking for myself, I planned my life and career around my children, that I chose to have. My husband and I planned our finances so I could stay home when they were younger and then I chose a career that allowed me to be with the kids when they were on vacation. That meant that we didn't have the money to spend on expensive camps and activities, but we did have the joy of raising our children and seeing them turn into responsible adults.
     
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  22. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    I, too, have wondered this. It really makes no sense if you think about it. To clarify, even if you’re poor you still have to budget every time you are paid, whether that is for groceries or bills or what have you, so why can’t people budget for the cost of having children?

    Now let’s say you walk into a store and you see a nice flat-screen tv for $2,000, but you only have $1,000 to spend. Do you buy the tv anyway? Well no, you buy the tv that costs less than or equal to a $1,000.

    I think all high school students at some point should sit down and watch the following Saturday Night Live video about managing your money:

     
    Last edited: Dec 18, 2018
  23. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    Excellent!
     
  24. SpecialPreskoo

    SpecialPreskoo Moderator

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    OK... just finding this post. Here are my 2 or 3 cents on the matter.

    If you are going to have kids, then you are going to have kids when school is not in session.

    Plan accordingly... daycare, take vacation days, beg family to keep them. Parents' responsibility.

    We are teachers not your free babysitters.

    I love my students but I need a break from school, not them. Sometimes I'm ready to come back because my husband and kid start driving me bonkers.
     
    Last edited: Dec 21, 2018
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  25. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    I wish I could shake your hand. This is such a brilliant post and chock full of truth. Well done!
     
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  26. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    The best I can say is...

    Best-laid plans don't always go through. Families in respectable financial situations may falter on money. Things can get unexpectedly hard, and I don't think it's fair to demand people only have kids if they plan on being rich constantly.
     
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  27. whizkid

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    [​IMG]
     
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  28. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    I didn’t say families need to plan on being rich as a minority of the US population is rich.

    The correct actions that should be taken before anyone has children should be:

    1) Graduate from high school.

    2) Don't have children before you are married.

    3) Get a job.

    If you do these *easy* things, you have a 75% probability of entering the middle class, according to the Brookings Institute. It’s not rocket science.
     
    Last edited: Dec 18, 2018
  29. whizkid

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    Yep, the "being rich constantly" is nothing but a strawman.
     
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  30. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    Indeed.
     
  31. whizkid

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    For 16 full days you get to feel our pain. Lol

    For 16 days, I don't have to hear any children. Oh how sweet is! Come on Friday!
     
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  32. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    If they don't have jobs, they're not desperate to find daycare for their kids during the break.

    All I'm saying is that very good families can find themselves in temporary situations where, yes, caring for children during breaks is suddenly difficult. Go clutch your pearls elsewhere.
     
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  33. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    Yes, that is true that people can find themselves in difficult situations through no fault of their own. I’m talking about people who make poor decisions through their own volition and not through unfortunate happenstance.
     
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  34. TrademarkTer

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    Hi Ben.
     
  35. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    What? My name is not Ben...
     
  36. whizkid

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    Cool story bro
     
  37. TrademarkTer

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    Ben Shapiro---he constantly cites what you just cited from the Brookings Institute. Just picturing him saying it when I read your post.
     
  38. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    ...........................
     
  39. a2z

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    Yet I know many people who have fulfilled all of these things and you and whiz would be raging against these families because they would struggle with school breaks. They would make it work, but would struggle.

    See, that last requirement for you is usually the part that makes breaks hard for parents. The fact that both parents need to have jobs to support themselves makes breaks difficult.

    Unlike you, they have to give up intangibles for that second job. But it is your choice to have no children or spouse. I'm happy you don't because you don't want them, but this is part of the conversation we have been having with you for a long, long time. Those who want those things (and thank God someone does because the species would end otherwise), have added expenses, added, stress, and very different responsibilities.

    Gone are the days were one parent stayed home and families stayed in the same town so all of the school breaks weren't an issue. Even as it started to change to two people working, there were still many families with local family who had someone not working. Now 70 year olds work at walmart as greeters because they can't afford to live or they are too sick to watch the grandkids.
     
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  40. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    My friend is having a problem right now because she had kids before finishing school and getting a degree. Now, she wants to go back to school but is financially unable to because her bills are high due to daycare, etc. To top it off her husband passed away. Now she's kicking herself for not finishing school before she had kids. I feel terrible for her. Thankfully, her in laws are now moving in with her and will take care of the kids so she can go to school maybe next year. Sad situation.
     
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