Parents and Nap/Quiet Time

Discussion in 'Preschool' started by Hannah's Place, Feb 29, 2008.

  1. Hannah's Place

    Hannah's Place Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2008

    Hi all ~ I have a problem that creeps up every now and again. This morning it happened again. I am very tired and of course under the weather so that isn't helping my frame of mind. Need some objective and professional advise.
    This parent demanded her child not nap any longer. I told her her child is never "forced" to nap, it is simply quiet time and she is given books to read if the child chooses to do so. Now I was told to also give her crayons and anything else I could think of to utilize this time. I told the parent not only is that not going to be allowed but that I cannot have her up for 9 hrs. straight and me without a break (or staff) to get tasks done. I will not have her up and thinking she can have the run of the place which is the problem at home. The parent is having issues with bedtime at home and now her younger child is also doing this (isn't that a clue that it is her and not me or anything to do with resting here???)
    I could go on and on, but really what I need is not to vent, I need some solutions and some professional but firm ways to respond to the parent.
    My place is set up so that I have two rooms for nappers...one for the sleepers, one for the little ones who need more of a quiet time zone. My home is only so big and I cannot have three rooms dedicated to naptime.
    HELP!! :help:
    Thanks!!!!
     
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  3. 3Sons

    3Sons Connoisseur

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    Feb 29, 2008

    Often there's state law mandating a rest time for preschoolers. I know a lot of kids just lie down quietly during this time. You could cite the law (though I think you're okay with the books, I really don't know much about the area).

    What will probably irritate the parent is you saying you need a break. Yes, it's foolish, but parents won't factor this in, and will assume activity with their children all the time. You should probably focus instead on the law, and that you don't want to create a disparity with the other kids that would lead to her child being alienated.

    Stress that she does stay awake during the "nap time". If she's not going to sleep at night, it's not because she's sleeping (and even if she were -- it's what the state mandates). Your job isn't to run the little kid ragged so they're nice and docile for the parent (don't actually say that, at least in those words -- maybe just note that she is active during the day).

    You might take the opportunity to ask a few questions in the spirit of helping resolve the problem. What is her bedtime? Maybe the mother has it set too early. What does the family do before bed? If she's particularly active right before bedtime, it could create difficulties falling asleep. What kind of bedtime difficulties is she actually having?

    You might also point out that it's a characteristic of gifted children to sleep less (unless this is ludicrous to suggest, this would make most parents pleased, and may have a sort of "bless the messenger" effect).

    Also, bedtime difficulties are extraordinarily common. There are relatively few children who, when it's time for bed, respond to their parents with "Okay, I'm going to sleep!" For the most part, there's protests and whining. A lot of children will even protest more if they're sleepy.

    Of course, the last resort is to tell her you won't be able to serve her child anymore. Whether you do this would essentially be a business decision on your part.
     
  4. Hannah's Place

    Hannah's Place Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2008

    Thanks, 3sons, I always forget to quote State Laws. I will look up immediately (I'm in CT).
    Her children sort of have a routine at bedtime, and sometimes she sticks to it sometimes not. I do understand life gets in the way of the best schedules and routines. But she has this Dr. who thinks 3 yr olds do not need naps and that is fine, I'm not going to impose my personal beliefs on her, but for example, I just put them all down and literally the child fell asleep INSIDE of two minutes. She is exhausted.
    The problem at night is that the child goes to bed at 8pm, but just lays there awake til after 10pm. I don't know if mom is always popping in to check or waking her up as she is drifting or what the story is. As far as activity at night, sometimes yes, sometimes no. Her child is an extremely active child, and overall a great kid.
    Thanks so much for your input!!!
     
  5. Hannah's Place

    Hannah's Place Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2008

    State Law does not help....we only have to provide a safe place for each child (mat/cot) to rest or sleep.
    I even called them and they said there are no guidelines at all, only that we have to offer a place for each child to rest/sleep.
    So that leaves my own business policy to put into play here.
     
  6. milestones_fcc

    milestones_fcc Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2008

    Then stand firm in your own policies. I have a 5 y.o. here who doesn't always sleep, but he quietly looks at books on his mat, and I'm fine with that.

    Here, we call it "rest time".
     
  7. lilabraham

    lilabraham Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2008

    You could pull "Well I haven't charged you for the time she sleeps but if you'd like her entertained through the other children's rest time, I'll adjust your rates".
    It works out to 22% of your regular rate for a 2 hour nap in a nine hour day.
     
  8. Hannah's Place

    Hannah's Place Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2008

    I LOVE that idea! Of course, after starting my day off at 7am by biting my head off she comes in to pick up and is singing a different tune. I told her I let her get up after 30 min today but that I could not do that every day since we need to allow time for staff breaks and other work to be done and she was ok with it. I did tell her I'd consider getting her up after 1 hr but the truth is the child will be sleeping.
    I will be sticking firm to my policy here that while sleeping is optional resting is necessary for both child and adult.
    I appreciate all of your ideas and thoughts ~ thanks for keeping me sane today!! ;)
     
  9. Grammy Teacher

    Grammy Teacher Virtuoso

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    Feb 29, 2008

    Our policy is that children must rest for 30 minutes and if they don't fall asleep within that time, I give them books or some paper and crayons.They must stay on their bags and work quietly so the others can sleep. I have parents who ask that I wake their kids up after an hour. I think that is reasonable.
     
  10. tgpii

    tgpii Comrade

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    Mar 2, 2008

    1. Most places it is a state law. 2. The parent needs to be the parent at home. 3. If the parent don't like it why do they send there child there? 4. I have had the same issue my self in the past.
     
  11. MsWK

    MsWK Habitué

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    Mar 2, 2008

    The rule at my center is that you don't have to sleep, but you may not disturb the other children.
     
  12. Grammy Teacher

    Grammy Teacher Virtuoso

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    Mar 2, 2008

    I'm having some problems reading some posts. Please check your spelling so it all makes better sense and we all sound more professional when posting. Thank you.
     
  13. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    Mar 2, 2008

    Here's a pre-educator days perspective as a parent. In school I don't tell the school how to run their classroom. In a daycare setting, I do tell the daycare person what I want done with my child. What's the difference? Money.
     

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