In this case, the OP must go to the other teacher and tell him or her that her classroom is no longer to be used for such purposes and that she's cleared that with admin. If it continues to happen, the OP should speak to admin about the other teacher.
You appear to be fixated on the conspiracy theory of the paras and ignoring the fact that a teacher sent a student out of her room, without making sure that another teacher agreed to accept that student. Saying the paras are friends is less problematic to me than a teacher laying this off on the para when I would be willing to bet that there was a directive to remove the child from her room. You are seemingly determined to make this all about disrespect from the para without even considering the true root of that problem, which is the clue that you don't want to look at everything that created the problem, you just want your para gone or at least "put in her place". If things had been better between you (your words), why not at least try to find out why this student wasn't in class, and why the teacher failed to get permission for the student to be placed in someone else's class? As you are adamant about having the last word on how and what gets done in your classroom, shouldn't you at least consider that the other teacher is just as adamant, which means the transfer happened with her blessing, but she didn't bother checking to find out where the student went? This sounds like school culture. I'm sorry, but once again, you don't appear to want to actually consider the views of other posters, probably any more than you consider the views of your para. Face it, from your own posts, you seem determined to make her a villain, and you paint her that way every chance you get. You give about a sentence that things are better, then an entire thread screaming about being disrespected. It is a little reminiscent of the boyfriend thread, and I think that may be a pattern with you - who knows, I could be wrong. If I am, I am sorry. Have you ever tried saying those words?
Wow. Thanks for MOST of the advice. At the end of the day I have to deal with admin, I have to deal with parents, I get evaluations and have to display student progress, me me me. That is why I don't need her telling me what is and isn't disruptive. I thank most of you for positive advice.
This is all true. But again... it is important to remember that you are dealing with somebody with more classroom time than you in this specific school. She isn't a teacher, but she is a professional who has seen other classrooms and worked with many teachers. You're the one who is ultimately accountable, but you'll get better results with a happy, respected para who feels like a valued member of a team... and I wouldn't discount the possibility that your administration will use feedback from your para in your evaluation. It wouldn't be official or anything, but I'd expect your admin to at least have a casual conversation with your para about what the room is like, and if your para compares you negatively to past teachers, I'd expect to have more surprise visits than you otherwise might have. Think about it this way... your administrator is the one accountable for the school... but I'm guessing you wouldn't be thrilled if he/she dictated every detail of your day without consideration for your own knowledge and experience. You also wouldn't appreciate it if, after a new principal took over, school policy were to change without notice... and you got your hand slapped over following the old policy. Yes, you are the boss in the room, and your word should be final, but I'd strongly encourage you to presume positive intentions from your para. My guess is she is doing the job as best she can, and simply doesn't understand that you want things done differently.
Principal said that it is entirely my decision and needs to come through me. They called Para into office and told her that I make the decisions and she was out of line. We didn't have any issues today. Actually if a new admin came in I would not have a major issue. Me right, her wrong. Period. Lol. Problem solved.
While this situation appears to be fixed for now, you will have a much smoother year if you quit focusing in who is right or wrong and instead focus on working as a team. While your para isn't a teacher, she is a professional and should be treated as such.
This probably WOULD be the best time to attempt to smooth over the hurt feelings on both sides. Try to approach things with a start-over mode, and get her opinion on the things where she IS an expert.
Thanks ladies. My feelings were never hurt. Just wanted to prove a point that I am serious and I will keep order. I always ask her opinion about stuff. She usually isn't a problem.
My para and I are working together great this year! I never have to prove points to her because I do not feel I am above her. I wouldn't be able to pull as many small groups or have as many students receive interventions without her hard work. I appreciate that she is so flexible. She's also great with the kids!
You should check out Steven Covey's "The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People." Instead of going for the win/lose (you win/your para loses) which you are currently doing, you should go for win/win (you win/para wins). Talk to her. See where she's coming from, and then you will be better able to fix the issue. It will make you and your para feel much better.
Um. The worst supervisor I ever had was the one who took pains over time to ensure that I knew my place and did not stray from it. It's only October, StarsofTommorow: continuing to enforce and reinforce your para's subordination as you're insisting on it here is likely to make a very long, tense year for both of you. It also conveys the message that you're a bit insecure; if insubordination is as big a concern with you as it seems to be, you could be setting yourself up as a target.
