New Friends?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Learner4Life, Aug 16, 2010.

  1. Learner4Life

    Learner4Life Cohort

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    Aug 16, 2010

    I am really really jonesin for a social life outside of my *new* husband's family!!! So my question is how do you make friends as an adult???

    I seem to have alienated my coworkers and I don't really know why... so that is kinda out. I don't really go to church, so that is out. I don't have kids so I can't meet people through my kids. Does anyone have any ideas???
     
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  3. Samothrace

    Samothrace Cohort

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    Aug 16, 2010

    checkout meetup.com

    I've never used it, but I have friends who have. You can look into hobbies or events that people have planned and join along in.


    I'm in the same bit as you. During my undergrad I was so focused on school (I commuted) and pretty much worked full time...I didn't really do the whole college social scene...which I kind of regret sometimes. But I was on a mission..and graduated with an almost 4.0 average.

    Now that I'm starting grad school, I'm hoping I'll meet some more people. lol
     
  4. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    Aug 16, 2010

    I have a group of friends that I've made at work during the past few years. I worked with many of them for longer than that, but we just became friends in recent years.

    Other than that, I really don't know how to make other friends. My five closest friends are all people I met before the age of 20. (I'm a month away from 40.)

    One of those friends moved several states away a few years ago, and she uses meetup.com sometimes. She's been to several different meetings.
     
  5. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Aug 16, 2010

    Carrie and Doug from King and Queens had some interesting ideas for making new, childless friends. But I don't recommend them. :)

    Honestly, I'm not sure. I don't really have friends and I'm uncertain how that works beyond high school. Best wishes!
     
  6. Marci07

    Marci07 Devotee

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    Aug 17, 2010

    I'm also having the same problem. One thing that I'm working on is making an effort to keep in touch with friends from work. I didn't use to take the initiative but I realized that asking them to meet for a quick bite or coffee is a good start.

    I've also looked up into meetup.com but I haven't attended any meetings yet.
     
  7. Joyful!

    Joyful! Habitué

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    Aug 17, 2010

    Even if you don't go to church now, you can always start.:) The closest and longest lasting friendships I have were begun at church.
    Absent that, I have met many people when taking classes of different sorts. (Like a cooking class or an art class.) Lots of people that I know have made friends at the gym. Join a book club.
    Also, you might make friends with some of your husband's family's friends. I've met some great people on a friend of a friend kind of introduction.
    Best wishes.
     
  8. silverspoon65

    silverspoon65 Enthusiast

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    I have that problem, too, especially since I moved. I have made a couple friends at work. It would be really nice if I meant someone in my college class this year, too. I also found an improv group (on meetup.com) and I think I am going to join that once school gets started up a bit.

    I am a bit intrapersonal though. A lot of things I would just rather do by myself. lol. I have just come to accept that.
     
  9. carlea

    carlea Comrade

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    What about hobby clubs? I love to scrapbook so I found a CM consultant who has monthly workshops and started going.

    I also made a friend at jury duty (we were there for 12 days so we got to know each other). She invited me to a candle party and I met more people.
     
  10. SPECIALEDMAN

    SPECIALEDMAN Companion

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    Aug 17, 2010

    Teachers having trouble making friends? Am I the only one that finds this strange? Sorry, I just couldn't imagine teachers with their outgoing personality and experience in speaking having friend issues. Not making fun, just puzzled.
     
  11. Learner4Life

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    Thanks for all the advice... I've never even heard of meetup.com so I will be checking that out. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one in this boat!

    It's easy to make friends with kids!!! Actually, I'm working at Old Navy for the summer and several people have commented on how quickly I can strike up a conversation with a 10 year old.
     
  12. tiki7719

    tiki7719 Companion

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    Aug 17, 2010

    meetup.com is good
    or, join a gym! I made new friends there :) They are excellent walking buddies.
     
  13. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Aug 17, 2010

    You join things.

    I helped out with our parish Fesitval over the weekend, and am now on a first name basis iwth the mom of one of my incoming frosh. (I taught his older brother 3 years ago and I'm thrilled to be teaching James this year :) )

    You join a gym or a book club or volunteer your time.

    You invite the neighbors for a BBQ or an open house, or a Tupperware party if that's what you're into.

    You get a dog and walk it. You'll be stunned at how many people you can find to talk to as you walk your dog.

    You start pushing a baby carriage around over the same route each day and decide to start a playgroup.

    The thing is: each idea starts wtih the word "You."
     
  14. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    I agree w/ Alice. You have to get out there & join things, such as volunteer, tk fun classes at your community colleges & centers, church & their various auxilliaries, gym, maybe dog parks (if you hv a dog of course), etc.
     
  15. FarFromHome

    FarFromHome Connoisseur

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    I've had success as a teacher, but I wouldn't say that I'm really outgoing. I actually got told a lot of times during college that I was too quiet to be a teacher. But I do really well with the kids.
     
  16. Learner4Life

    Learner4Life Cohort

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    HA HA HA HA That would be really funny with no kid inside it!!!! :dizzy:

    I joined meetup this afternoon and will be looking for more ways to get involved.
     
  17. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Aug 17, 2010

    Join a book club

    Join a gym

    Take an adult ed class

    Reach out to new teachers in your district

    Walk in your neighborhood, say 'hi' to neighbors who are outside...

    All of what Alice said.:thumb:
     
  18. Marci07

    Marci07 Devotee

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    Aug 17, 2010

    I have no problem handling a group of teenagers and being the center of attention with this group even knowing that they think I'm old, boring, silly, etc... but when it comes to a group of clickly adults I'm a total chicken.
     
  19. kimrandy1

    kimrandy1 Enthusiast

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    Aug 17, 2010

    I'm not shy, and I find that I get along with everyone, and have close ties with only a few people. I coach (volunteer), sing in the church choir (religious activities), work, and take a camera class, have a dog I walk 3 or more times daily...but none of these activities have provided me with a friendship that continues outside of that setting. Well, I do have a couple of work friends that I do social things with, but only planned social things (book club, happy hour), not spur of the moment, send me a text, let's see a movie tonight kind of things. I have three very good friends - 1. mom of my daughter's best friend (probably my best friend...), 2. a sorority sister from college, and 3. an aide that used to work at my school that also has kids my kids ages.
     

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