"Negative Nelly" teachers

Discussion in 'General Education' started by Pi-R-Squared, Oct 7, 2018.

  1. Pi-R-Squared

    Pi-R-Squared Groupie

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    Oct 7, 2018

    Do you have any at your school? Do you sit with them at lunch? Can you feel the negative vibes coming off them?
     
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  3. rpan

    rpan Cohort

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    I avoid them like the plague, for my own sanity.
     
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  4. CherryOak

    CherryOak Companion

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    Oh, yes. The world is ending every day for some people, isn't it?
     
  5. blazer

    blazer Connoisseur

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    Perhaps they are realists? Those sitting there pretending everything is rosy are the problem!
     
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  6. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    The one we had quit last year. She would demand that people be positive all the while she pointed out negative things every day LOL Her scathing emails were comical!
     
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  7. Ms.Holyoke

    Ms.Holyoke Connoisseur

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    Interestingly, I haven't come across any at my school! The staff at my school is great.
     
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  8. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    Ours have retired or moved to other schools.

    I’ve told my friends to be sure to let me know if I start acting like that. I really want to avoid being the negative person. I’m not sure they realize they are being like they are.
     
  9. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    In my experience, there's 1 at every site!

    The lady at my school is unhappy in her personal life (she reminds anyone who'll listen that her husband cheated on her and that "...the girl is their daughter's age"). All that bitterness seeps into her work life, unfortunately.
     
  10. MissScrimmage

    MissScrimmage Aficionado

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    I think it's possible to be a realist without bringing everyone down with you. I could go to the staff room and complain about my class, about the parents that I work with, how overwhelmed I feel and how our local government is unsupportive. OR I can go to my resource link and ask for more support and strategies, I can fill my principal in on a parent situation and ask for her advice, and I can ask my teaching partner for some time to plan together.
     
  11. shoreline02

    shoreline02 Cohort

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    Yes, always. I don't sit with them at lunch since only about half of the staff actually use the staff "lounge" to eat their lunch. It's not very welcoming and also not the cleanest.
     
  12. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    I think it's normal to share something that could be negative once in a while but not doing it to the point where every day you complain about something and people avoid you LOL
    The people who pretend everything is perfect are just as annoying. We're human! We have bad days sometimes!
     
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  13. Pi-R-Squared

    Pi-R-Squared Groupie

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    I've had my share of complaints! But there is another teacher here who the students call "the hated one." They avoid his room as much as possible. They'd rather come to my homeroom to chat just to stay away from this guy!
     
  14. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    Y'all should see it from the admin/office perspective. We hear her voice and whisper, "Here she comes."

    The gentleman who handles teachers' union grievances starts each phone call with, "I'm sorry, but she called us again and said (insert complaint)." I think even he's sick of her.

    The other day, I could hear her say she was coming to talk to me. I literally shuddered. I mustered a smile, though, and handled her issue.

    We keep reminding ourselves, "Three more years until she's gone" (retired, I mean).
     
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  15. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    Unless someone takes care of her before that (just kidding ;) )!
     
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  16. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    Oct 10, 2018

    Ditto.
     
  17. futuremathsprof

    futuremathsprof Aficionado

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    That is quite depressing that you have to deal with someone like that. What is wrong with people?
     
  18. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    We had one who was so bad we had to start hanging “do not disturb” signs on our doors because we got tired of hiding in our rooms to avoid her. She was negative AND a talker. :confused:

    When she decided to leave, we sighed in relief. I feel bad for her new coworkers, though. She is the perpetually disgruntled type.
     
  19. miss-m

    miss-m Devotee

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    How do y'all avoid getting sucked into the negativity when you can't avoid the people? This is honestly my team this year, and I toe the line between being positive and negative most of the time anyway. Since my team my first year was so positive, it was easier for me to be positive. Not so much this year, since "being positive" sometimes just means "keeping my mouth shut." I've caught myself saying a lot of things this year that I wish had never come out of my mouth. :(
     
  20. Geologygirl

    Geologygirl Comrade

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    I feel like I am becoming one of these and I want to change. We had one retire last year.
     
  21. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    I like you Blazer, but here is where we disagree. I really need to stay positive to teach and I don't need other teachers spewing out negativity during the day. Could you imagine being on a sports team and spending your time outs complaining about the fans or things that you have little control over? I am now with one of the most positive group of teachers and there is no way that I would want to go back to a campus of negativity...even if the negativity is true.
     
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  22. waterfall

    waterfall Maven

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    I can see both sides. Pollyannas are just as annoying as negative Nellys, IMO. Having a safe place to vent and people who can relate is important. I think teachers also tend to easily fall into being martyrs...putting up with bad or unfair conditions because it's "for the kids" and then being accused of being "not dedicated" if they complain or advocate for themselves.

    On the other hand, it is important to see the positive too because that's what keeps you going! A few years ago I was close with two teachers who just hated our P with every fiber of their being. Anything she did, they would throw a fit about and gripe about nonstop. At my previous school, I worked for a truly awful P and this P was NOTHING like that. If this P was truly the worst they'd worked for, they must have had pretty charmed careers. They both ended up transferring to other schools in the district the next school year, and quickly found out that all of the "issues" weren't caused by the P they hated so much. I was friends with them when I first started at the school, but by the time it was their last year there (4 years later) I wasn't sad when they announced they were transferring.
     
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  23. FourSquare

    FourSquare Fanatic

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    I'm probably that person. I've taken to just keeping my mouth closed 90% of the time so nothing bad comes out. :p The other 10% of the time, I force myself to deliberately say something nice and leave it at that. My one teammate has similar concerns to mine and we try to meet up just the two of us to get our venting out before we're in the presence of other people. Last year was REALLY BAD for a variety of reasons...we were determined this year to be "glass half full" people. Ironically, a sudden change in administration has made everyone else lose their minds. I'm already committed to positively though, so I'm just over here like BEST YEAR YET, GUYS. LIVING MY BEST LIFE. :whistle:
     
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  24. corunnermom

    corunnermom Rookie

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    Oct 21, 2018

    I have one on my team and though I am always kind to her and we work together, I choose not to eat lunch with her nor engage in conversations beyond what it necessary. I have to stay positive and though my kiddos are difficult, I believe in them! It's okay not to surround yourself with toxic people!
     
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  25. Reality Check

    Reality Check Habitué

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    Oct 24, 2018

    This quote supports my life-long contention, "Positive = Fantasyland."

    I've worked with colleagues that, even with regular brawls in the hallways, knives and guns being found being brought into the building, a majority of the students saying in response to receiving an assignment, "Yeah? I'd like to see you try to MAKE me do it!", kids thrilled with a "D" as "good enough," turning in grades where the student with the 40 Average gets the "A", (and on and on), STILL say, "Oh, it's not so bad here."

    If you have to pretend that everything is alright in order sleep at night or to drive your blood pressure down, then you're trapped in "Fantasyland."

    Blazer is dead-on: "Perhaps they are realists? Those sitting there pretending everything is rosy are the problem!"
     
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  26. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    Oh there is nothing wrong with stating the truth with a problem.."Hey, we are out of copy paper, the students don't have their supplies." etc. I am all for that type of honesty even if it is negative. What I am talking about is the constant whining, complaining, gossiping, bad-mouthing, etc. just to poison the air with no effort to tell those who really can do something about it. I am talking about the teacher lounge negativity where anyone who is not in the room is fair game. That I do not miss. I like being with colleagues who laugh and compliment each other. They also will let the principal know we have no copy paper, students are out of control in lunch room, and other problems. Reality...yes, but creating a negative atmosphere..no thank you.
     
  27. ms.irene

    ms.irene Connoisseur

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    My classroom neighbor is one of these...and I actually agree with her on 95% of the issues, but I just don't see the point of wasting time complaining about having too much work to do when complaining won't change a thing. We are all too busy, we are all stressed, etc, etc, so please don't waste even more of my time b*&^%ing about it...
     
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  28. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    I see your point and don't disagree, but there's also a big different between being a realist and just being negative. There's little to reality about everything being negative.

    Oh, I like having a nice healing vent session every now and then, commiserating good-naturedly with others. But it's something that needs to be kept in check. Yes, every place and classroom has its negatives. But if you're constantly complaining, it's too much for you.
     
  29. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    I hate to be a negative Nelly, but...
    Yesterday, at least 3 incidents occurred where people did not do their job properly or did not use common sense in terms of efficiency. I wanted to SCREAM at these people but in one instance I went and talked to someone calmly instead of putting the emphasis on the negative aspect. It went well! I think it's fine to complain about things but it's all on HOW you do it!!
     
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  30. Pi-R-Squared

    Pi-R-Squared Groupie

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    UPDATE: Even though I still sit across from what I consider a negative-nelly male teacher during lunch, I've found the less I talk to him about anything, the better I feel about my work and my students. It just seems that he complains all the time, calls a particular grade of students stupid, and just rambles on and on about how those students don't accomplish much. He also tries to initiate small-talk and I hate small-talk. In fact, at our faculty table, the women sit on one side and the men on the other. I think if he didn't try to talk and start conversations, we men would just eat our food while the women eat and chat. And I'm perfectly fine with that.
     
  31. whizkid

    whizkid Cohort

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    Oct 28, 2018

    Good thing that didn't happen here because the gossip would be endless from the school administration on down!
     

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