need feedback for CBEST experience essay

Discussion in 'Basic Skills Tests' started by Hpn, Oct 21, 2015.

  1. Hpn

    Hpn Rookie

    Sep 15, 2015
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    Oct 21, 2015

    Experience Essay:
    Dan Rather, former CBS anchorman, spoke of teachers who help other by being one "who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called 'truth'." Consider a situation where a teacher, coach, mentor, friend or relative acted in this way towards you.

    American politician, Brad Henry once quoted, “ A good teacher is one who inspires hope, ignites imagination and instills a love for learning.” A teacher for me is not just the one who conducts academic classes in the school or college, but is the one who has guided us in different ways in our journey of growing up. A person whom I look up to as my guide, my mentor and my teacher is my mother. My mother has been my biggest supporter through every thick and thin of my life. She taught me to turn my weaknesses into my strengths, overcome the fear of failure and never to compromise on your basic values.

    Even though our’s was a low-income family, my Mom made sure that my sister and I should never be short of the basic amenities. My Mom used to work part-time so that along with financially supporting us, she is also present to help us with homework, after-school science and math projects, in addition to the extra-curricular activities. Life was going smoothly until one day back from school, I felt feverish and fatigued. At that time I was seventeen years old but still like a baby, I approached Mom and told her about my condition. She immediately visited the doctor,in turn, doctor advised some tests and to everyone’s surprise, test results were shocking, I was diagnosed with Tuberculosis. My family and I were devastated to know this, as being a twelfth grade student, I was in high spirits to pursue the study of engineering. As a result of this, to take care of my health, Mom had to quit her part-time job, which alleviated our difficulties.

    In spite of such rough times, my Mom didn’t lose her physical and mental balance. Determined to help me with speedy recovery, besides taking care of my diet and required medication, Mom made sure I was not left behind in academics. Although, I discontinued attending school, my Mom started home-schooling me and encouraged me to read a lot. To provide financial aid, she started working at night, so that in day time she could concentrate on my health and education.Since, I was a big football fan,Mom always boosted my morale by reiterating a famous quote, “It’s not whether you get knocked down, its whether you get up.” by Vince Lombardi, a well-known football player and coach. Undeniably, my Mom’s efforts showed its colors, I recovered and positively appeared for the twelfth grade exams, and scored well. Thereafter, I successfully completed my studies in engineering and got absorbed in a multi-national organization.

    Professional life in multi-nationals is always challenging, where sometimes you need to make tough decisions and sometimes you face insult or failure by your colleagues or seniors. During such situations, recalling my Mom’s attitude towards life in rough times, helps me maintain my state of mind and make correct decisions. Not only in work life, in personal life too, when I had kids, need arose to quit my job. I did leave job without any regrets when the memories of my Mom taking care of me when I was sick flashed back.

    Moreover, my Mom proved to be my best friend, my mentor, my teacher and overall a person whom I have always looked upto. She stood by my side through every thick and thin of my life, teaching me how to patiently overcome challenges of life and face the odds. Had she not taken care of me so well, I would never have learnt the essence of family and moral values like love and compassion. Overall, I realized life would not be so meaningful if my mother was not there for me.

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