I'm really upset and nervous. Sorry in advance. I know this is very long. At my school, we have a teacher rep and a para rep. They are supposed to be intermediaries for teachers and paras who have an issue with the administration. However, I found out on Friday that my para has been complaining about me to the para rep numerous times and apparently the para rep is going to or already has informed my principal who will be calling my para and me in for a meeting on Monday to address my para's issues. I was not supposed to be informed of my para's complaints as they are supposed to be confidential. However, someone did not want me to be completely blindsided so I was given a heads up. I don't know the exact nature of the complaints other than I'm apparently "rude" and "abrupt" when speaking with her. Also, I don't give her her own personal copy of my lesson plans. Instead, I keep a lesson plan binder in a central location in the room and that's disrespectful because, according to her, I should be giving her her own personal copy of my lesson plans rather than sharing my binder. For the record, she's right. I am kinda rude speaking with her. My tone is respectful, but I don't look her in the eye and I only speak with her when absolutely necessary. Why? Well, to be honest, she has lost my respect. She comes upstairs 10 minutes later than she is supposed to every day, and extends her lunch every day, refuses to stay a second past her contracted time even though she's not supposed to leave until the bus picks up the kids. She also disappears from the classroom without a word, and spends much of her time sitting and waiting for instruction rather than being the least bit proactive. Also, when I do speak with her, she makes me so uncomfortable. She tends to just look at me in response or give me a one or two word answer. She obviously is unhappy with me and it feels so awkward talking to her. So now my stomach is in knots about this. I know I've complained here about most of the things I mentioned above (sorry to seem to be doing that again), but I haven't complained to admin because I live in paranoid fear of a nonrenewal and I don't want to do anything that makes me seem difficult or whiney. Obviously, my para does not have this same fear and she's apparently been complaining about me relentlessly and in lieu of coming to me first with any issues. What should I do? Of course, I immediately drafted a document with a detailed list of all my issues and will present it to my principal. However, I am not supposed to know about any of this. WWYD? I am considering going straight to my principal first thing Monday morning with my "complaint document" and letting her my principal know my side of the story - rather than waiting around to be called for a meeting. Or, should I wait to be called for the meeting? Note - I'm not going to get anyone in trouble for giving me the heads up. That person does not care at all if it is found out that she told me. So, what should I do? Please help. I'm so scared of anything jeopardizing my job.