my grade 8 son keeps calling his classmates for parties but they don't invite him to their houses

Discussion in 'Middle School / Junior High' started by thesub, Dec 9, 2016.

  1. thesub

    thesub Comrade

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    Dec 9, 2016

    This is so silly but it breaks my heart and I have to vent somewhere. My 14-year old son calls his classmates twice a year for parties - his birthday and Christmas. All of them show up, bring giftcards, eat pizzas, hang out and leave. This has been going on for 4 years now but none of them have ever called my son to hang out with them - either at their homes or outside.

    Now my son is hearing-impaired and is not physically strong like these boys and cannot keep up with their basketball, track activities etc. So in a way, I understand them not hanging out with my kiddo. I know the boys do have "playdates" with each other, run track but it just annoys me that their moms also don't think about including my son.

    I want to talk to my son frankly about these things but my husband keeps saying "let our son be innocent a bit longer and he will realize on his own" etc etc.

    What do you all think???? Thanks so much. The kids have been "friends" since elementary school.
     
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  3. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Dec 9, 2016

    It's nice his friends show up when invited. Be thankful for that. The other parties are
    Most likely based on the sports/team associations. Your son will find his own way.
     
  4. Secondary Teach

    Secondary Teach Companion

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    Dec 9, 2016

    I think you should first communicate with your son to see if this bothers him. It could be that your son may not want to go to every activity or birthday party with his friends because as you say- he is not physically strong and is hearing impaired. He may be just comfortable at home. Now, his friends are teenagers, and may not realize that what they are doing is wrong. Again, I think you should communicate this "problem" over with everyone involved- your son, his friends, and your husband to first determine if there is in fact a problem, and then work on solutions together and then on how to incorporate your son into some of their activities.

    :)
     
  5. thesub

    thesub Comrade

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    Dec 9, 2016

    Thank you both.

    My son, his friends, my husband don't see it as a problem and my husband feels I am too sensitive and you are right about the comfort factor. Btw, he's never invited to any activity/b.day party now - his last classmate birthday party was in elem. school, I think. We do go for family parties with cousins.
     

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