...right now! I trust him and I'm not worried at all, but it is so STRANGE to be sitting in bed at my parent's house when there is probably an ucky stripper all over him. Ewwwwww LoL How do you all feel about the bachelor party experience? Gross? Necessary? Silly? I lean towards silly, but I know he has been really looking forward to this night with his friends and family.
My DH had a " bachelor" party with His buds and family, but it was more just them hanging out doing silly things as guys. No strippers were involved. I would not have been okay with that.... I totally trust him, but neither of us believe in supporting that kinda thing....
That's definitely not acceptable in our relationship. Neither of us are into that kind of thing anyway.
I wouldn't say either of us are "into" it- actually, the poor guy has been quite nervous about the inevitable strip club trip. But I know he's truly been looking forward to his out of state family coming to celebrate with him, and he was very excited today to golf and hang out with all of them.
He has been in the dark about the party plans- I knew it would involve golf, a BBQ, and "going out"- he didn't. But he has been to enough bachelor parties in his family to pretty much figure a strip club stop will be involved at some point. And I think the nervousness is caused not by the strip club itself, but by knowing that the "bachelor" gets the brunt of the attention.
Don't feel nervous, he'll just come back with a little more glitter than when he left My boyfriend goes out with his gross friends all the time. Not to strip clubs, but to bars and I know they're talking about boobies and sex and oogling the waitresses. I don't care at all. Because he's coming home to me I'd feel the same way about a bachelor party.
Let the man have his fun and meanwhile what are you having for your party? You sound like you are very understanding about it all. My own take... it is a silly tradition and a VERY LOUSY excuse for men or women look at the opposite sex with barely any clothes on and not get any action done about it. It is a tease, and if the intent is for the designated party to rush home and do something with their partner, meanwhile thinking about the woman OR the man that was stripping; :crosseyedNOT COOL... Rebel1
My BF & I totally agree! Who's to say that going to a strip club for a bachelor party is "tradition"? If a man's normally not into that kind of thing, why would he care do it right before he gets married? To me, it's kind of pointless for him to suddenly be curious about it & go. If he is into that, that's him & his future wife's situation to deal with. If she wants to put up w/ that & just say that as long as he comes home to her, it's all good, that's great for her...NOT ME!
You know, I hope you don't start questioning your trust in your boyfriend because others believe the bachelor party is unacceptable. It's a tradition in many circles, and for the trustworthy it's a harmless one if it doesn't violate your own personal moral code.
Oh, don't even get me started on strip clubs. A naked woman sitting on my man's lab, rubbing her breasts in his face, and touching him? How is that not cheating?!! My boyfriend has a bachelor party to attend this summer (he is in the wedding), and the groom told the wedding party what he would like to do. A strip club is in the plans. I told my boyfriend he should not come home until he has showered. And I'm 100% serious. Just being in a disgusting place like a strip club makes me sick, even if he isn't doing anything. I'm just so anti-strip clubs!
No biggie in my world. If my hoosband was going frequently, or it became a common outing with his buddies, that would be a different story. But, a party here and there, meh, doesn't bother me at all.
Same here. My husband's friends took him to a strip club but it was more for their benefit than his and since he had single 20-somethings as groomsmen he was fine with letting them have some fun after they'd spent the day playing paintball, going to dinner, etc. He said he drank a beer and bought my (younger, single) brother a lap dance. Probably made my brother's day and I just wish I could have seen his face, lol. At one time I thought it would bother me but it really didn't because I trusted him. Like KC said, if it had become a habit that would be a different story, but he hasn't gone to another once since. I've watched some shows on HBO that probably show more than what he saw at the strip club, lol. I can see how it really bothers many people, though, and I know if I had not wanted my then-fiance to go, he absolutely would not have. I had 2 Bachelorette parties in Boston and while neither involved male strippers, I can't say my friends would have turned down seeing Chippendales if it was on the agenda.
Thanks-that's exactly how I feel. Are strip clubs my favorite thing? No. Would I attend one with a bunch of girlfriends? Nope. But for him to go one time, I can't see getting upset about it. I know who he is and what his values are, and one silly night with a bunch of friends at a strip club is not going to change that.
My husband's bachelor party consisted of beer and poker with the guys. No big deal. Now, for my part, my girls did take me to a strip club. Not something I would normally do and I haven't been back since, but it was fun at the time.
I'm glad you followed up the "for the trustworthy" with "if it doesn't violate your own personal moral code". It seems many people feel that if you are opposed to such activity it indicates a lack of trust, when more often it's not a trust issue but a moral one. I morally disagree with strip clubs and it wouldn't be interested in a relationship with a person who desired to visit them. Would I think that person would be tempted to go home with a stripper? I highly doubt it. So trust isn't even a factor. Just the need to agree on some important (to me, us) moral issues.
I wouldn't say it's trust or morals, it's boundaries. Every relationship is based on them. Is it okay to go out to bars with the sex you are attracted to? Is it okay to go to strip clubs? Is it okay to go to swinger clubs? Can your partner have a "best friend" of the sex they are attracted to? Every relationship is different. I don't think it's morals, because someone could have very good morals and still be okay with strip clubs. It's just a boundary issue.
I think it's silly, but it wouldn't have bothered me if STBX had one. He didn't want a party, so the groomsmen went out without him. :lol:
I don't have any moral problems with strip clubs, but it would cross some boundaries for my relationship. If you're okay with it, it's all good! It's very common and normal and I hope others' opinions don't make you doubt your relationship, because I bet it's all fine! As others have said, every relationship and individual is different. I almost wish I could blow it off like it doesn't matter to me, but I just don't have it in me. I don't have a problem with the idea of bachelor parties, just the stripper part. BF goes out to bars and stuff without me all the time because I have a lot less free time in the evenings than he does. I trust him and don't have a problem with it.
These strip club places sound worse than FB or cleavage. Or even crazy parents. Where did you say they were?
If you are worried, Maybe you DON'T trust your boyfriend. One, the groom usually does not choose the place the groomsmen do. Two, Many times the groom "just goes along for the ride" Three, Many times the groomsmen will try to get the groom drunk. At one bachelor party I was involved in, they got the groom "pass out" drunk put him on a train to Chicago (with an undercover friend with plane tickets back) The groom was too hungover to complain but the bride, well I think she is still not talking to the Best man, and it was over 35 years ago.
I don't have an issue with it at all! My husband was actually kind-of sad that his groomsmen didn't take him to a strip club because I was completely okay with it. They floated the river, barely got him drunk, and dropped him off at home by 10:00. He actually wound up being the DD for MY bachelorette party that same night. Poor guy.
I did not have a crazy fun bachelor party. Any chance there is a tradition for doing this like on the 10 year anniversary? That would be a nice tradition.
Yes-it's called throwing a bachelor party. You pretend to throw it for some guy you know that's getting married........but you know it's really an excuse to do it for yourself!
I'm a teacher, I work with mostly women (thus most of my friends are women). I know very few single guys. All the guys I know/friends with are married.
No, I was not too much involved it the train/plane part, I was just in charge of picking them up at the airport and have his tux ready, mouth wash, deodorant, toothbrush, clean underwear, shoes, aspirin, black coffee, etc. and money for the Motel 6 room to put him back together in. My Bathing suit and a bath brush so I could help him in the shower if he needed it But he didn't need help (thank god) see it was a little part
Haha, wait, you guys did this right before the wedding!? I guess I would be pretty darn angry too, then. Maaaaan, you guys!
