My Father Passed Away

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Ms. I, Nov 13, 2015.

  1. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Nov 13, 2015

    My father passed away this morning in his sleep. It's not a surprise, but of course we never want that day to come. He had turned 87 yrs old on Oct. 26th, which is when I last saw him. I last spoke to him a few days ago. He gave a great fight & I know my mother took care of him as best she could. He was in hospice for the last year & had stopped walking about 2 yrs ago. I'm glad he wasn't in much discomfort overall. His vital signs were good until the very end.

    My mom had gone on her routine morning walk & was only gone about an hour this time. She normally says good-bye to him before leaving in which he says to be safe, but she didn't this particular morning because he was sleeping so well & she didn't want to wake him. When she came back, he must have just passed not so long before she came back.

    My father was the best father any person could have! I wish he had seen me accomplish more in life (getting married, having a baby, having my own home), but that's how life goes sometimes. He got to see me graduate twice. In case anyone doesn't know, my parents are much older than the parents of others my age because they met later in life. I was born when my dad was already 46 & I'm my parents' only child. They were married for 43 yrs. He was also an Army veteran. I will miss him dearly!

    Thank you for reading.

    Just Added information: Oh, I just found out a second ago that I passed my comprehensive exam. I now also have my MS in Communication Disorders & Sciences w/ emphasis in Speech-Language Pathology. I wish I could have told my dad!
     
    Last edited: Nov 13, 2015
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  3. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Nov 13, 2015

    So sorry for your loss. It's been a while since you saw him. I hope you find comfort in the time you had with your dad.
     
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  4. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Nov 13, 2015

    So sorry for your loss. But, so happy that he lived a full life and was so good to you and your mother.
     
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  5. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    Nov 13, 2015

    I am so sorry for the loss of your father. Hugs.
     
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  6. ChristyF

    ChristyF Moderator

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    Nov 13, 2015

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you and all those who loved him.
     
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  7. teacherintexas

    teacherintexas Maven

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    Nov 13, 2015

    I'm sorry for your loss.

    You may need to be subtly involved in your mom's day to day life for a while even though you'll have your own grief to deal with. Going from wife to widow is a tough adjustment.
     
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  8. Mrs. K.

    Mrs. K. Enthusiast

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    Nov 13, 2015

    Very sorry for your loss. No matter how much we try to prepare for it, this is always a hard part of life.
     
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  9. Maryhf

    Maryhf Connoisseur

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    Nov 13, 2015

    Loss of a parent is so hard, no matter what the age of you or him. So sorry Ms I. And congrats on your achievement.
     
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  10. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    Nov 13, 2015

    So sorry for your loss
     
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  11. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Nov 13, 2015

    My condolences, Ms. I.
     
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  12. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Nov 13, 2015

    I so appreciate all your kind words & prayers everyone! Hugs back to you.
     
  13. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Nov 14, 2015

    Ms.I. I am so sorry for your loss as a daughter and please give your mother a hug as I am sorry for her loss as well. Like teacherintexas said you will really need to be there for your mom. She will probably have that brave face & stay "busy" right now... But in near future it will hit her pretty hard especially since she was his main care giver!
    Hugs to you & congrats on passing. Your dad knows! ;)
     
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  14. Missy

    Missy Aficionado

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    Nov 14, 2015

    I am sorry for your loss; it is never easy. Take care.
     
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  15. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Nov 14, 2015

    I so appreciate all your kind words & prayers! Hugs back to you.

    Yes, he was a one-of-a-kind person who always stuck by my mom's & my side. He worked hard for our family.


    I asked my mom if she wanted me to stay with her overnight at her house, but she said it's OK & that she'll be fine. Her & I talk by phone as it is daily, so of course that will never change.

    I've been awake since about 4am & haven't been able to get back to sleep.
     
    Last edited: Nov 14, 2015
  16. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    Nov 14, 2015

    I'm very sorry for your loss.
     
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  17. bella84

    bella84 Aficionado

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    Nov 14, 2015

    So sorry for your loss.
     
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  18. Rhesus

    Rhesus Comrade

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    Nov 14, 2015

    My condolences to you. Losing a parent is never easy.

    My father died about a month ago at age 76. He died unexpectedly in an accident with some farm machinery. The mental stamina that dealing with such a thing takes makes it hard to do every day things. I am still not at my best professionally.
     
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  19. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Again, I so appreciate all your kind words & condolences.

    I know that my mom & I are long, long overdue for a nice, carefree vacation. We've BOTH worked so hard with what we've had to do, especially in the last few years.

    Rhesus, my condolences to you as well. I think it's worse when one's death is sudden as opposed to already knowing that it will happen soon...even though you don't hope it happens anytime soon.
     
  20. creativemonster

    creativemonster Comrade

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    Nov 14, 2015

    I am so sorry for your loss.
     
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  21. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Nov 14, 2015

    Love to you and yours.
     
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  22. stargirl

    stargirl Companion

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    Nov 14, 2015

    I am sad to hear this news, for both you and your mom. I know from your posts that you were very devoted to giving him the best possible care.
     
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  23. Special-t

    Special-t Enthusiast

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    Nov 14, 2015

    So sorry for your loss.
     
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  24. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    Nov 15, 2015

    I've been off-line for a couple of days, so just saw this now. I'm so sorry, Ms. I. The loss of a parent is something that we are never really prepared for. I'm glad that you are close and are able to be there for your mom as she grieves and goes through the major adjustment that losing a spouse brings about. Many hugs.
     
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  25. runsw/scissors

    runsw/scissors Phenom

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    Nov 15, 2015

    I am so sorry! Take care of yourself.
     
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  26. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Nov 15, 2015

    I'm back again. Again, I so appreciate all your condolences everyone. I can now focus on truly relaxing physically & mentally for the rest of this year at least & having my mind at peace, which I now can since I also passed my grad school exam to graduate. I still can't believe my dad's passing AND the news of the passing of my exam happened on the same day.

    I always knew God did things for a reason, so maybe He wanted me & my mom to get the news about my exam on the same day, so it would help ease the sadness about my dad. Not to overshadow my dad's passing, but I'm so, so happy that I passed that exam! I had taken the exam back in March of this year & didn't pass all parts. It was initially a 6-hr exam & I think the toughest exam I've ever taken.

    I want to end this post back on my dad. There were a few times my mom said that he told her he was tired & my mom would tell him to keep trying to stay alive. I'm sure that thinking happens to many elderly people when they know their lives are coming to an end.

    Words cannot describe my dad. One good memory was when he'd ride on all the amusement park rides w/ me because my mom never would. She was too afraid, but she was still there, but watching from afar. That's the only thing my dad & I ever did just the two of us. My dad truly loved me. My mom said he hoped it was a daughter, when she was pregnant w/ me.

    My dad was a sergeant in the army before he was honorably discharged.

    My mom still did her best to continue giving him vitamins, etc. up until the very, very end. We're religious & she says the Bible says man could live to 129 yrs (I think it was), so she was defininitely striving for my dad to still live as long as possible. She never gave up. She never though the idea of living to 129 is outlandish because she believes w/ God's blessings, us living right (healthy habits, etc.) that a person could live that long.

    Again, I thank you for reading.
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2015
  27. Kat53

    Kat53 Devotee

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    Nov 15, 2015

    So sorry to hear about this, Ms. I.
     
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  28. TXforever

    TXforever Companion

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    So sorry for your loss, Ms. I.
     
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  29. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Phenom

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    Oh, I'm so sorry Ms. I. At least he got to spend another nice birthday with his family. It sounds like he lived a good long life! That's something to be thankful for.
     
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  30. miatorres

    miatorres Comrade

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    Nov 16, 2015

    I am so sorry to read this, Ms. I. I am grateful for your dad's service to our country. My condolences to you and your family. God bless you.
     
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  31. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    I so appreciate your condolences. I went with my mom today to discuss the memorial service details. My father was a simple man. He chose to be cremated and didn't want any viewing or funeral.
     
  32. DHE

    DHE Connoisseur

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    Nov 17, 2015

    Ms. I you have my deepest condolences. Losing a parent is a hard thing at any age. As others have said, you're going to have to be therefor your mother, even though she says she is fine. Those just because days will be the days that she appreciates the most. Lastly, congrats on your accomplishments.
     
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  33. scholarteacher

    scholarteacher Connoisseur

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    Nov 18, 2015

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad 3 years ago so I understand. My prayers are with you and your family.
     
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  34. melnm

    melnm Companion

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    I'm sorry to hear about your father, Ms. I. Your family is in my prayers.

    Congrats too on passing your exam.
     
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  35. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Nov 18, 2015

    I very much appreciate your prayers and condolences everyone.
     
  36. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    I am just now seeing this Ms. I. I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent, even being aware that it can be soon, is still very difficult. My deepest sympathies and prayers are with you and your mom during this time. Congrats too on passing your comprehensive exams! Your dad is smiling down on you!
     
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  37. webmistress

    webmistress Devotee

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    Ms. I am so sorry. God be with you all.
     
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  38. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Nov 18, 2015

    I very much appreciate your prayers and condolences.

    I had a full day today w/ my mom shopping for our outfits for the memorial service. I'm glad we both found something. We're both wearing black pantsuits. I also ordered some Born ankle boots.

    If anyone happens to know a good site with printable obituary templates, please let me know.
     
  39. Stacy9876

    Stacy9876 Rookie

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    Nov 23, 2015

    I'm so sorry for your loss, and congratulations on passing your comps! I know what an achievement that is I'm sure your father is proud of you :)
     
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  40. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    I appreciate your condolences and congrats Stacy9876.
     
  41. Proud2BATeacher

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    I've been gone from AtoZ for almost a year, but I have to sent my condolences to you and your mother. Please know that you and your mother are in my prayers Ms. I.
     
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