Miss or Ms??

Discussion in 'New Teachers' started by pinkdaisy88, May 24, 2011.

  1. pinkdaisy88

    pinkdaisy88 Rookie

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    May 24, 2011

    I'm meeting my students tomorrow and I'm giving them envelopes with my address and a stamp on them. I am encouraging them to write me a letter over the summer. How do I address myself on them though? Miss FirstName Lastname or Ms FirstName LastName. Np first name, only last name? Help please!!
     
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  3. TeachingHistory

    TeachingHistory Companion

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    May 24, 2011

    It's really personal preference. My sister has a strong aversion to "Ms." and uses Miss. I go by Miss out of habit. I might start referring to myself as Ms just for kicks to see if I like it. When the older ones call me "Mrs." I always ask them if they know something I don't.... :)

    Honestly though, especially if you have the little ones (I see you have 3rd grade listed) , You will be Miss, Ms. Mrs, and quite possibly Mr. all in one day. (Most likely along with a butchered version of your last name. Mine's a common last name and more often than not the kids, and a lot of adults surprisingly, never get out all the syllables) There's also a good chance you'll be called mom or dad by the end of it. So go with whatever you think looks the nicest on paper. :)
     
  4. waterfall

    waterfall Virtuoso

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    I would go Miss lastname, but that's just my personal preference. Personally, I don't like the sound of Ms, and being 23 most people realize I'm not married anyway so that's not fooling anyone.

    Like teachinghistory said, your kids won't know the difference. If kids call me Mrs. ______ I don't bother to correct them as long as they get my last name right. I let mine just use the first letter of my last name too if they want since my name is kind of weird. Most kids interchange miss and mrs. regardless of who they're talking about and if they're married or not. I don't know anyone at my school that goes by ms. I don't think the kids would even understand that, haha.
     
  5. VANewbie

    VANewbie Devotee

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    May 24, 2011

    I go by Ms. but Waterfall I did not know Miss and Ms were pronounced differently. Is this what you are saying?

    I was always told that Miss is for a young girl. I guess 16 and under.
     
  6. mopar

    mopar Multitudinous

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    May 24, 2011

    I would go by Miss and did, but yes, it is personal preference. My mom always told me that people who go by Ms are divorced. Not that this is true, just a stigma that I grew up with.

    If my students wrote me a letter, I would expect Mrs. last name only.
     
  7. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

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    May 24, 2011

    I used Ms. and I teach middle school. My co-teacher refered to me as Smith (not real name) and the kids called me Mrs. Smith...I gave up and even answer my phone Mrs.... I'm divorced. I honestly wish I could use Ms. first name but that's not going to happen.
     
  8. Proud2BATeacher

    Proud2BATeacher Phenom

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    May 24, 2011

    I go my Ms. but only b/c Miss sounds so young to me. At one of the schools I worked at, everyone was Ms. (even the married ladies).
     
  9. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

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    May 24, 2011

    Maybe I will have better luck in Mississippi...I think Miss sounds to young for an old dog like me:) Proud I like the idea of everyone using Ms.
     
  10. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    May 24, 2011

    I'd go with Ms. Lastname. I don't think they need to include your first name at all.
     
  11. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

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    May 24, 2011

    Yes, I will go with Ms. Lastname. I wish I could use Ms. firstname only. I know it's silly, but my last name is my ex's...but it's my kids last name and that's why I didn't change it.
     
  12. waterfall

    waterfall Virtuoso

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    May 24, 2011

    ms. is pronounced mizz. If I reach back into the depths of freshman year social studies I believe it was originally part of a feminist movement where women didn't want people/men to be able to tell if they were married or not just by their name so its a "mizz" so you can't tell.

    I think "ms" sounds too old for me personally, so I guess I could understand how older teachers think "miss" sounds too young. Like Mopar says "ms" kind of reminds me of an older divorced woman- which is fine, but not for someone my age haha.

    donziejo- we have several teachers at my school that go by miss firstname. Is this not allowed at your school or do you think people would people just frown upon it? The speech pathologist, psych, and OT all go by miss/mr. firstname, so many of the teachers assumed I wanted to be the same and would call me miss firstname in front of the kids at the beginning of the year. I asked to be called by my last name instead- I think miss firstname is a bit too preschool-y for me. We also have a kinder, 1st, and 4th grade teacher that go by miss firstname.
     
  13. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

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    May 24, 2011

    Waterfall, at the school I teach at presently one has to use their last name. But I AM just assuming at my new school. I will have to ask. This thread has made me think about changing my last name. My children are grown.
     
  14. rhoyalt06

    rhoyalt06 Rookie

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    May 26, 2011

    I go by Ms. Lastname by everyone in my school except for my students who are SPED and my Assistants. They call me Miss Firstname because it's easier for them. I like to use Ms. because I usually refer to my students by using the title Miss. (EX: Miss Katie can you please sit down?)
     
  15. NikkiT

    NikkiT Rookie

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    May 28, 2011

    I go by Ms.--for some reason, I feel that the parents give me a little more respect if they think that I might possibly be older and married or divorced. People tend to think that I'm younger than I am, and I just feel like "Ms." sounds more mature and professional. Also, I don't think it should have to be everyone's business if I'm married or not. I like the idea of all women in a school going by "Ms.", I guess it's just me growing insecure about being unmarried as I get older, though--lol.

    Anyway, I was taught that "Ms." was made for when you write a letter to someone, or otherwise have to address them, and only know her name, but nothing about her marital status. As others have said, my first-graders call me "Miss", "Ms.", "Mrs." and "mommy" (it's so cute to see how they get a little embaressed when they do that:) all of the time. My last name is not very long, but a little unusual/hard for little ones to say. So, I even had one student call me "Mrs. Tortilla" for a couple of days (I didn't correct her at first b/c I thought it was just too funny!:)
     
  16. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    May 28, 2011

    I was Miss Maiden-name until I got married, then switched to Mrs. Peter's-last-name.

    It never really mattered to me whether or not people knew my maritial status; the wedding ring (or lack thereof) told them that info anyway.
     
  17. LUCHopefulTeach

    LUCHopefulTeach Habitué

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    May 28, 2011

    When I student taught my students wrote my name as Ms. Maiden but pronounced it as Miss. Maiden. I didn't care if they called me Ms., Miss., or Mrs. or how they wrote it. I just got married yesterday so in the future I will be going by Mrs. MyMauiden-Husband'sLastName or Mrs. S-F.
     
  18. Miss W

    Miss W Phenom

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    May 28, 2011

    I go by Miss. I was also taught that only older ladies who weren't married and women who were divorced went by Ms. When I write I always put Miss W. However when my kiddos call me Miss, Ms., Mrs., or mom I always answer.

    Side note: Teaching abbreviations really went well this year since Mrs. W (my mom) has been volunteering a lot in my room. Just last week someone walked in my room asking for Mrs. W and my boys pointed them towards my mom.
     
  19. Joyful!

    Joyful! Habitué

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    May 28, 2011

    Congratulations! :love:
     
  20. LUCHopefulTeach

    LUCHopefulTeach Habitué

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    Thanks! Didn't wait to hijack but its relative to the topic! ;)
     
  21. DistantSun

    DistantSun Rookie

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    Yes, Ms. was originally designed so that women could have a title like men do, one where the very first thing you know about a person isn't their marital status. I am old enough to remember the origins but am glad it's being taught in social studies class. :)

    But as a mid-life single woman, I am very glad of its existence and am sad to hear that it's now being considered as a title only for divorced people. Most women in my circle keep their maiden names so need a title that reflects that, plus the reason I mentioned first. I did a demo lesson a few weeks ago and the teacher asked me, "is it Miss Sun or Mrs. Sun?" I really don't like my name to be dependent on my marital status nor that probably the second or third fact that this stranger knows about me is whether I'm married or single (we don't all meet and immediately look at each others' hands but we find out each others' names). I said Ms. Sun, he told the class Miss Sun, and that's OK. But when I start my class this year I'll be Ms. Sun.
     
  22. waterfall

    waterfall Virtuoso

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    ^^I put Ms. on my job applications last year because I figured it was none of their business. I figured being unmarried could be seen as either a positive or a negative by that school, but I didn't want to be judged or considered in any way based on that. My current P asked me if I was married after she offered me the job- but only because she was helping me look into housing.
     
  23. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    I love my husband dearly but I go by Ms. In the business world, it is safer to say Ms. if you do not know their marital status. I don't mind it being known that I am married but I am comfortable being a Ms.

    I confess I don't know how they are all pronounced really.
     
  24. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

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    I'm comfortable being a Ms. I just want to change my last name.
     
  25. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    On the history of Ms. :

    I attended high school in the mid seventies, when "Ms." was first making an appearance.

    One of the biology teachers proudly proclaimed to one and all that she was "Ms. B."... until she got married and changed her name to "MRS. S."
     
  26. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

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    I like that story Alice. I grew up during the Ms. change also. One of my friends was really into Ms. Right up until the day she got married, and she talked about her "husband did this" day and night. It was kinda cute:) They are still married but she calls him by his name!!!
     
  27. NikkiT

    NikkiT Rookie

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    I bet a lot of people do go from 'Ms." to "Mrs.", as Alice said. So, I'm sure that a lot of people, especially ones that were around when the term "Ms." first began being used, feel that it is somewhat silly b/c people will pretty much assume that "Ms." = "Miss", anyway. However, I still like using "Ms.". I attended high school a good twenty-five years after the creation of the term, though. So, maybe I see it as being more legitimate. People cannot see my fingers when they read my name on a paper, nor do I think that they are scoping out my fingers when we meet--so, I like that "ms." doesn't let them know about my personal life right away. I promise that I will go from "Ms. T", to "Ms. ____" (not "Mrs.____"), in order to help others see the term "Ms." as not meaning "Miss" or divorced "Mrs. ___" or whatever else people think about it.
    I just think it would be a lot easier if all women used the term "Ms.". I know that even with it being in existence, I am constantly worried that if I use it when speaking/writing to someone that is a "Mrs.", she'll be offended b/c some people do have somewhat negative ideas about the term...or are so proud of being a "Mrs." (like the girl in Alice's story). I guess I'd still have to worry about if people are a "Dr." or not, though. Oh, well.
     
  28. PinkCupcake

    PinkCupcake Cohort

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    I prefer Miss, but I've been called Miss, Mrs. and Ms. by students and parents before.
     
  29. Olive.Owl

    Olive.Owl Rookie

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    I remember getting my first nametag and asking my preference. I told my admin that I would prefer "Miss" because "Ms." sounds too matronly, lol.

    I remember reading something on Dictionary.Com on how "Miss" is short for "Mistress", which was used in the past, and was seen as derogatory, so it was changed to "Ms."

    I will still go by "Miss" ;]
     
  30. jcar03

    jcar03 Companion

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    I prefer Miss

    I always that Ms. was used for a woman who is either divorced or widowed. You use Ms. when you are unsure of the person marital status.
     
  31. missjessica

    missjessica Rookie

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    I'm wondering what I should go by. I am a first year teacher and will be teaching high school. I'm young-just 24, so I'm not that much older than my students. Should I go by Ms. or Miss? The school is in a community where almost every parent has a college degree and many are doctors, lawyers, etc. I want them to take me seriously and respect me.
     
  32. soleil00

    soleil00 Comrade

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    I always was told that Ms. meant that you didn't want people to know your marital status and Miss was what you used if you didn't care that people knew you weren't married.

    I don't know if that's correct lol but that's what I've always gone by.

    On my applications I put Ms. I will probably use Ms. in class as well because it's just easier for me (two letters vs. four lol)
     
  33. mkate

    mkate Comrade

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    Interesting thread. Here we all use our first names, no Mr./Ms. etc. Even university professors-- it was kind of strange to me at first to call them by their first names!

    In any case, if I were in the US I would definitely use Ms. (but then again, I grew up reading Ms. Magazine, so there you go!)
     
  34. Aussiegirl

    Aussiegirl Habitué

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    I go by Ms. although I am married, because I maintained my maiden name instead of taking my husband's.
     
  35. Emily Bronte

    Emily Bronte Groupie

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    I go by Miss.
     
  36. Southernese

    Southernese Rookie

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    What's interesting is that down south a lot of times we use "Miss" and a first name even if a lady is married. This is especially true of women you're on familiar terms with who are older than you, like your parents' friends. My mom's best friend is "Miss Karen" to me, for example.

    I see "Ms." quite a bit in writing, but I never hear anyone vocalize "Mizz."
     
  37. FourSquare

    FourSquare Fanatic

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    So, funny story. At my recent graduation my parents were talking to my teacher friends and me about this very subject. All my teacher friends are mostly young women who decided to go by "Miss." I went off on a rant about how I prefer "Ms." because "Miss" implies something about your marital status and I feel like that's nobody's business. We went 'round and 'round (jokingly) for a while and my parents looked all funny.

    Later they apologetically presented me with an engraved nameplate that says "Miss MyLastName." :lol: They didn't know!

    I still love it of course. It makes me smile every time I look at it.
     
  38. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    4sq, OOPS.
     
  39. LiteratureLover

    LiteratureLover Rookie

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    I go by Miss. I was always told that Ms. is for people who have been married. That may or may not be true, but I always think that. :lol: So Miss it is.
     
  40. MrsCK

    MrsCK Companion

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    I was recently informed by my father-in-law that Miss meant you are an unmarried woman. Mrs. means you are a married woman. Ms. is a newfangled term that represents the independent woman! :)
     
  41. dgpiaffeteach

    dgpiaffeteach Aficionado

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    MrsCK, that's funny :lol: I've always preferred Ms. Just personal choice but if kids call me Miss I don't care. Mrs. I hate. Even when I get married I'm keeping my maiden name and going by Ms. _____ I'm the last one in my family to have my last name and I just can't give it up!
     

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