Miffed About My Child's Open House

Discussion in 'General Education' started by MsDeb, Sep 19, 2013.

  1. MsDeb

    MsDeb Comrade

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    Sep 19, 2013

    Hi All,
    I attended my own child's open house (high school). I sit down in her math class. The teacher comes over, hands me a progress report and without a greeting of any sort, says "she's failing. she needs to come for extra help". It's a roomful of students and parents. Every one turns to look. My child is mortified and I am too. Then he proceeds to the front of the room to start his presentation.

    Afterwards, I email him and said that I would prefer to discuss my child's progress in private (and a whole bunch of other things about how we're working with her at home, blah, blah, blah). He responds to me that he is justified since he doesn't know when he'll ever see me since he doesn't have private office hours. Now I'm angrier than I was to begin with. Am I overreacting? Couldn't I be contacted by phone or email?

    I don't know how to respond to this. I feel like if I continue, I'll just **** him off and potentially make my child's life in his class more difficult but on the other hand, as a teacher I would NEVER embarrass a student in front of other students and parents.
    What would you do?
     
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  3. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    Sep 19, 2013

    I don't know what I'd do, but that was way out of line!
     
  4. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

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    Sep 19, 2013

    I wouldn't have been happy with that either. When someone continues to insist their actions were justified, it usually means they were not - and the person knows it.

    If one of my sons' teachers does something I dislike or disagree with, then responds to my attempts to communicate with "My actions were justified", then I'm probably going to justify MY actions of going to the P and making a big issue out of something that could have been handled very easily with a little cooperation and communication.
     
  5. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Sep 19, 2013

    I would make an appointment with the department chair.

    No child deserves to be embarassed by his grades in front of others.

    And how exactly does one get a teaching job where there's no way to contact parents?? So from now till June, there's no way he can contact you?? Ridiculous.
     
  6. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Sep 19, 2013

    What has already been said. (Adding: just horrible.)
     
  7. webmistress

    webmistress Devotee

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    WOW, that is horrible. Leaves me speechless.
     
  8. Brendan

    Brendan Fanatic

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    Sep 19, 2013

    Forward the email chain to his supervisor, which should be an AP. That's unacceptable.
     
  9. kpa1b2

    kpa1b2 Aficionado

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    Sep 19, 2013

    What teacher has private office hours? At my school and my son's high school, that is what a prep is for!
     
  10. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    Sep 19, 2013

    What he did actually violated the law. You need to report it to the admin there. What worries me is if he did that at open house, what does he do daily in the classroom with students.
     
  11. mrachelle87

    mrachelle87 Fanatic

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    Sep 19, 2013

    Amen!
     
  12. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    Sep 19, 2013

    I think you have a right to be concerned for your child if you go above his head. Anyone that would embarrass a student like in front of other adults would certainly be doing it to in class in front of other kids.

    This was uncalled for. Why can't he contact you via e-mail? Have you had any e-mail communication from him? Is it possible he had a bad e-mail and is frustrated because he couldn't get in contact with you via e-mail? Even so, it was not justified, but I was just throwing out reasons he might be upset.
     
  13. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Sep 19, 2013

    This teacher was out of line and should be reported to his department chair or AP.
     
  14. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    Sep 19, 2013

    I agree with the other. Schedule a meeting with his supervisor. This would be an instance where I would insist on having my child removed from his class.
     
  15. readingrules12

    readingrules12 Aficionado

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    This is what I would do: A face to face meeting with his supervisor--AP or P would be good. I do think that most Ps would be very appreciative of you bringing this to their attention.
     
  16. EMonkey

    EMonkey Connoisseur

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    It is one of the times I would be fighting to move my child to another class if possible.
     
  17. hbcaligirl1985

    hbcaligirl1985 Cohort

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    Sep 20, 2013

    Report him.
     
  18. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Sep 20, 2013

    This.
     
  19. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    Sep 20, 2013

    Absolutely not acceptable. It was rude and unprofessional, in addition to being illegal. Ask for a meeting with the principal.
     
  20. monsieurteacher

    monsieurteacher Aficionado

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    Agreed
     
  21. eternalsaudade

    eternalsaudade Companion

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    Definitely agree with everyone here, you should contact his supervisor. I am not an expert, but it sounds like a potential violation of FERPA.
     
  22. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Please let us know what you're planning on doing and keep us in the loop about what happens. I cannot imagine this action going unanswered.
     
  23. MsDeb

    MsDeb Comrade

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    Thanks for your responses! I still haven't responded to the teacher or decided what else to do. My colleagues at my school and here, all say I need to speak up! I know the principal pretty well at the h.s. (I teach at the elementary school in the same town). I'll stew on it some more tonight....
     
  24. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    It needs to be addressed, and preferably sooner rather than later.
     
  25. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    Sep 20, 2013

    And like I said, if he said that in front of parents, no telling what he says in front of kids. I'll bet there are many other parents who would like it if you spoke up as well.
     
  26. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

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    Sep 21, 2013

    That's probably the first thing I would say; and I'd absolutely be mentioning it forcefully in any discussions that come up. Then I'd look at the anti-bullying policies.
     
  27. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Bumping this thread in the hopes of a follow-up from the OP. What's been happening with this situation?
     
  28. MsDeb

    MsDeb Comrade

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    Sep 25, 2013

    Hi Everyone!
    I've responded to the teacher and told him that it was not an appropriate time to share grades and concerns. I've also contacted the principal. I'm awaiting responses. I'll follow up with a conference request if I don't hear anything by tomorrow.
    I'll let you know what happens!
     
  29. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

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    Sep 27, 2013

    I see you're trying to be reasonable, but remember to be firm. What she did was certainly inappropriate, but it was also illegal.
     
  30. TamiJ

    TamiJ Virtuoso

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    Sep 27, 2013

    No, that was not appropriate at all. I would be upset as well. That is a private matter.
     

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