This may be TMI, especially for the men on the board, so fair warning. Since about the beginning of the year I've been having "issues" around my period. I went to my doctor in April and she kind of blew it off, saying it's just related to being in my forties. Each month since then got worse and the last two have been pretty bad, so I found a regular obgyn rather than my PCP. She said it felt like fibroids, but she wanted blood tests to look at my thyroid and an endometrial biposy all to rule out other problems. I'm also waiting for my insurance to approve an ultrasound. I've avoided medical stuff all my life because it freaks me out so much. I am terrified and I made the mistake of looking up these procedures and what is entailed as well as what they're looking for. I start a new job in a week. I'm terrified that whatever is going on is going to be a big thing. I have to finish BTSA this year and they're not flexible about anything. There's no time for this and really no money if it isn't manageable by lifestyle change or medications. I'm really not thrilled about the idea of being on any kind of medication anyway. I'm also incredibly irritated that my doctor ignored me months ago when I tried to tell her something seemed wrong. I feel like all of this would have been addressed by now. Anyway...I'm just in this void of terror. I have a friend trying to plan a getaway for her birthday in December and I'm afraid to commit. I feel like this wall is in front of me and I can't see my future or move on to plan things because I'm waiting for these tests and some kind of answers and praying they're nothing terrible. I know there are people out there in way worse situations than I'm in, so I feel kind of bad about crying here, but I'm scared and I felt like getting that out.