May have made a mistake ...

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by TampaTeacher, Mar 8, 2009.

  1. TampaTeacher

    TampaTeacher Comrade

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    Mar 8, 2009

    One of my kids didn't get to participate in our Fun Friday activities because she didn't have her weekly behavior report on Friday, which is one of the rules. It's a sheet parents sign daily that show whether or not the kid got in trouble at all during the week.

    She didn't have hers. She said it was because she was absent on Monday, when I gave them out, which she was. Kids know they are supposed to come to me on Tuesday if they didn't get a sheet on Monday. Heck, even if they come to me on Wednesday or Thursday, I'll give it to them.

    She is a good kid, and wouldn't have lost privileges otherwise, but it's a rule: No behavior report, no Fun Friday. In trying to be fair, I had her and about 6 other kids who'd lost Fun Friday for various reasons sit under an oak tree, while the other kids were on the playground for 20 minutes. The ones sitting out were reading and talking. I thought I was being pretty generous, in that other teachers keep such kids inside, doing work. Nobody seemed terribly upset at the time.

    After school Friday, one of the aides at my school ran into this particular girl getting on the school bus and said she was, apparently, very upset. She told the aid she'd asked me for a behavior sheet during the week and I hadn't given it to her.

    I've racked my memory, and just have NO recollection of her asking for one at all. I remember other kids doing so, and giving them to them. Maybe she's lying. However, there is a tiny voice in my head saying, "maybe she asked you when you were involved in something else, like guided reading or walking the kids to the lunchroom, and you said you'd give it to her later."

    I'm just not sure what to do. This has been bugging me all weekend. My husband said the first thing I have to do is chill out about the small stuff, but I feel terrible thinking I may have punished a good kid for my mistake. IF what she is saying is true, I wish she'd come to me on Friday to plead her case - but that isn't really her style.

    I'm also concerned I'll have her angry mother at my door or on the voicemail on Monday.

    Should I just wait this out and see what happens? Would any of you call home on a Sunday afternoon to be proactive? Am I making too big a deal out of this?
     
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  3. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    Mar 8, 2009

    I think I would let it go.
     
  4. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Maven

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    Mar 8, 2009

    She had Tues, Wed, and Thurs. to ask you for it. Even if you said you'd give it to her later she should have reminded you. In 4th grade she is definitely old enough to learn some responsibility for herself. There's always NEXT fun Friday. She'll live.
     
  5. frogger

    frogger Devotee

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    Mar 8, 2009

    I would let it go as well - like the PP said. Also, she had the rest of the week to ask you and this is 4th grade - they need to learn to be responsible for things as well. If it was that important to her she should have come to you on Tuesday and got it.
     
  6. Superteacher81

    Superteacher81 Comrade

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    Mar 8, 2009

    We all make mistakes-and you may not have! The truth is, the girl probably did not ask for one and just assumed that because she is good and never in trouble, she'd get by. If you have an angry parent on your hands because of this, just say the child is supposed to ask for one if they are absent and her daughter did NOT ask for it and even though this girl is never a problem, you can't break rules for one child. Honestly, I wish parents would let this kind of stuff go too!
     
  7. Arky

    Arky Comrade

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    IF she asked for it and you were busy and didn't hear her she should of asked again. She should of asked and asked until you gave her one. Tell the parent that she should of gotten your attention. Not your fault.
     
  8. Missy99

    Missy99 Connoisseur

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    Mar 8, 2009

    Tell Mom or Dad (if you get a call) what you told us (read your post again for a refresher :)).

    You were being fair.
     
  9. Missy

    Missy Aficionado

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    Mar 8, 2009

    Let it go.

    I establish a place in the room for things that are handed out, and students who are absent know where to go and help themselves. This helps them take responsibility, especially for things that happen every week.
     
  10. TampaTeacher

    TampaTeacher Comrade

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    Mar 8, 2009

    Thanks, everyone. This makes me feel a lot better.

    Missy - I need to come up with a plan like the one you have. However, when the kids used to have access to the behavior sheets, guess what they were doing ... Getting new ones during the week and replacing the ones teachers had marked for bad behavior. Sneaky little kids!
     
  11. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    You're fine. :)
     
  12. ChristyF

    ChristyF Moderator

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    I pretty much do what Missy does. My kids know if their face partner is out they should write their name on any handouts and put them in their "Not Finished" folder. The kids who are out know they have the responsibility of checking with those kids and with me. I tell my parents that on day one. We have got to teach the kids to be responsible for themselves. I coach them through the first six weeks or so and then it is on them. As for all the extra handouts, they all go in one slot on my organizer. All the kids know they are there so it wouldn't be hard for anyone to replace a ppaer they had lost. I'd say you handled the situation well.
     
  13. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    I agree with the others. Let it go, it's not the end of the world. There are bigger things to stress out about (and I am a major stressed out person too and this is something that I wouldn't worry about).

    In regards to figuring out a better system, I would have the person who is passing the paper out just stick one directly inside the absent students desk. That may help????
     
  14. WindyCityGal606

    WindyCityGal606 Enthusiast

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    Mar 8, 2009

    Don't worry any more about it. It happened and as the teacher, you have to stick by your word. It's over.
    Do not change your mind here or other students will run with it as will the parent who realizes you've taken the blame for something like this.
    If it was that important to the girl, she should have reminded you AGAIN and if she didn't get her slip, she should have had mom contact you. Personally, I think she lied to you.:2cents:

    BTW...if a student is absent in my class, papers go into their mailbox and they are responsible for what happens from there.
     
  15. leighbball

    leighbball Virtuoso

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    I would also let it go...talk to the parents if they call you, but don't make a big deal out of it if they don't. She probably learned her lesson. I doubt she'll ever forget about it again!

    As for me, I have my paper passers put things into the kid's cubby when they are absent. Then any extras go into the "extra bin" until the pile gets too big and I recycle the papers.
     
  16. TampaTeacher

    TampaTeacher Comrade

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    I'm a worrier, but I'm not worried at all anymore. Thanks, friends!
     
  17. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    Consider this a learning experience for the child.
     

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