Leaving notes for parents...

Discussion in 'Preschool' started by vbubbles1874, Apr 5, 2010.

  1. vbubbles1874

    vbubbles1874 Companion

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    Apr 5, 2010

    I was just wondering if anyone else left notes for their parents when there behavior was less than desireable and if they ever felt guilty about it? :dizzy: I had a couple of incidents today and felt that it was news worthy. I leave at 2:3O, so I don't see parents at pick up time. And my asst. is sometimes there, but she doesn't feel very comfortable talking to parents. :eek: I left notes for those parents outlining their child's behavior, yet I feel guilty. Why am I the one left feeling guilty? :unsure: I didn't make the choices for the kids and their behavior was strickly their decision, but I am dreading going in tomorrow to have to face those parents. :eek:

    Ok...I'm good now!!!:thumb:

    TFL
     
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  3. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Apr 5, 2010

    I send home behavior forms every day with all my students. I acknowledge excellent behavior as well as not so excellent behavior.
     
  4. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Apr 5, 2010

    I generally make phone calls regarding unacceptable behavior ...sometimes tone can be misinterpreted in written communications.
     
  5. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    Apr 5, 2010

    Unless the behavior is so overwhelming that the child needs a complete intervention, I keep the behavior in house.

    If Johnny hit Suzy, I deal with it, and it is over. To tell a parent about it in detail seems to be an over=reaction. Now, if Johnny hit Suzy, and continued to hit all day long, I would ask to talk with the parent about a plan.

    I think my approach comes partically from the preschool being a business meeting the needs of the family. Parents send their children to you to learn and practice their behaviors.
     
  6. Kteacher06

    Kteacher06 Companion

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    Apr 5, 2010

    Well, I'm in kinder so take this with a grain of salt....I do send notes home to parents about behavior, academics, random reminders, etc. They know that if I bring it up in a note, it's something that has been dealt with but is still a problem and I need reinforcement at home. That way parents are still in the loop since I don't see them all the time.
     
  7. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    Apr 6, 2010

    I really think it depends upon the type of facility. When I was director of a day care, the day care's job was to care for the children. We did not worry about petty misbehavior.
     
  8. vbubbles1874

    vbubbles1874 Companion

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    I don't usually send notes home for small stuff. The 2 notes I sent home were for major incidents. 1 was for telling a teacher "I'm gonna slap you" and then another slapped a friend because his friend told him he was 4, which is true. I felt it warranted a note home to mom and it worked. Today both boys were angels.
     
  9. cutNglue

    cutNglue Magnifico

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    Apr 6, 2010

    By kindergarten the kids can talk well enough that if they go home and say that Suzy slapped them, I will get an irate email from the parent if I didn't inform them. That would be considered a major offense.

    If the kid gets up out of his seat repeatedly today, that is something I deal with in house but if it happens habitually, then after some time, I will inform parents but I will also tell them strategies we are working on to reduce the behavior and why it is an important academic behavior skill to learn in kindergarten.

    I send a lot of emails to parents. I send good stuff too so when they see the negatives, it is just a piece of the puzzle and not an alarm sounding off. My parents tell me they like to know these things.

    Today one student was rough during PE. Knowing his history, I am certain that it was a case of not watching his boundaries and his play being rough rather than being intentional and from the reports I received, that is what it sounds like. I sent an email home to the parents but I also told them that I watch him during recess and remind him of safety behaviors I am looking for. During recess today he followed a really good safety rule without prompt and I praised him. He is trying. I need him to know, however, even when his classroom teacher or his parents aren't watching, safe behaviors are important at all times. Please remind him that a good friend is a safe friend.

    Sure, it was something that was dealt with at school but that doesn't mean that parents can't support it at home. The mistake sometimes is when that's the only kind of communication a parent gets and eventually they can become defensive. If it is worded in positive tones, it can help a parent reinforce it at home without feeling defensive about something they had no control over.

    Just like I have no control over what happens at PE but I'm still informed as the classroom teacher. Communication is a good thing. The child needs to know we are all on the same page. The positives, though have to outweigh any negatives for it to be truly effective.

    (You also have to know your parent sometimes.)
     
  10. Kase

    Kase Companion

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    Apr 7, 2010

    I write a note telling the parents to come see the next morning or to call me because I would like to speak with them. There's not really a space where I could leave the note in private so I never go into detail. Plus I feel I can explain a lot better in person. But I wouldn't feel guilty. You can't help the fact that you leave at 2:30 but I would try to catch the parent and follow up with them to make sure they did get the note. I wouldn't dread facing them. Go in there with confidence and know that you are trying to help this particular child. :D
     

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