Just got yelled at for about 15 minutes by parents

Discussion in 'General Education' started by Backroads, Sep 18, 2015.

  1. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    Sep 18, 2015

    Alright, I need a place to cry because it's teacher work day and my team mates are all somewhere or another.

    I just had parents burst into my room in a rage because their daughter isn't in the class they thought she was in. My school hosts a Spanish intensive program, but it's only one class per grade and I'm not teaching that class. The parents had applied at the end of last year to get into any open spots in the program and apparently thought filling out the application made things so. They're frustrated because they thought their daughter had been getting intensive Spanish for the past month, not sitting in the regular classroom. And after that, they yelled at me about taking off in the middle of the year for my pregnancy and said I was irresponsible.

    :dizzy:

    I didn't even get to speak after I acknowledged that no, I was not the Spanish Intensive teacher. Just kind of stood there. I get they're frustrated, but... wow.
     
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  3. CindyBlue

    CindyBlue Cohort

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    Aww, you poor thing! Maybe you could call your principal and have him/her take your class for a little bit while you find a way to feel better!
     
  4. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    Fortunately, no students today. Our jr. high is having parent-teacher conferences, so we were given a workday in the elementary building. A few parents still wandering in and out, though. But no students.

    I did get to go through the chocolate in my desk without having students see it. That was nice.
     
  5. Pashtun

    Pashtun Fanatic

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    1. I am assumming there has not been a back to school night or meet the teacher night yet?

    2. It is not your fault on the students placement. Period. I would have sternly told the parents to talk to admin and repeated, "I have nothing to do with placements, anything else I can help you with?"

    3. With regards to the maternity leave. Do not take that crap. Be firm and treat them like you would a student. You have no right to be talked to like that, let them know.
     
  6. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    1. There was a back-to-school night. They attended. They received my packet about the year. I don't believe I ever gave any impression this was the Spanish Intensive class. They never even asked about it.

    2. Would have loved to have said that. After the tirade, they just stormed out without waiting for a response. I ventured out a bit ago, but didn't see them to give the explanation.

    3. You're absolutely right. Again, they stormed out. I couldn't get a word in edgewise. I did e-mail my principal about what happened, she's in a meeting.

    I think I need to find a good alternative to necessary exceptions to "wait for the parent to finish".
     
  7. Pashtun

    Pashtun Fanatic

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    Yeah, backroads, this is the part of teaching I do not enjoy. Some parents are morons.
     
  8. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Maven

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    After about 2 minutes I would have demanded they leave and called someone. That is just ridiculous and disgusting behavior.
     
  9. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    I'm amazed your school allowed someone into the school and to your classroom without being announced.
     
  10. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    I have no problem telling parents, "If you're going to continue to speak to me in this way (yelling, cursing, etc.), this conversation will be over."

    I've had to hang up on parents or walk out of my office in the middle of meetings. Once, I even had to file a police report due to a very serious threat from a parent.
     
  11. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Next time...do this...seriously!
     
  12. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    In retrospect I can think of all I should have done. I actually received an apology email. They had sat in their car waiting for the principal. Apparently they has heard a rumor the teachers were the ones who made the placements... making it my fault. They had chosen the school just for the Spanish and drive their daughter 30 minutes to get here. So... big surprise she wasn't in the program after all that. I'm glad they apologized for the blow-up, but still, they're adults. If they don't move their girl closer to home like they're considering, my principal wants to sit in with me come conference.
     
  13. ku_alum

    ku_alum Aficionado

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    I was once verbally attacked by a parent at an evening cheerleading practice. The only other adult in the building was a janitor, and he was no where in sight.

    After walking away from my cheer squad (knowing the mom would follow) to get her away from them, I just kept repeating (while she was yelling), "I will finish this conversation tomorrow morning if you choose to schedule a meeting with admin." I probably said it 20 times while she screamed at me.

    She never did make an appointment.

    It was scary.

    I'm sorry you had to see such an ugly side of parents.
     
  14. teacherintexas

    teacherintexas Maven

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    It's one of the most frustrating parts of the job. My team got yelled at because the parent's child is marked tardy when she shows up 20 minutes late in the morning.

    Um. How is that our fault? We aren't making a judgement call. We can just tell time and we follow the school policy when taking attendance.

    Instead of using all that energy to rant and rave that it isn't her child's fault that she has been tardy all but one day of school so far, the parent should set her alarm a little earlier.
     
  15. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    This.

    Or "I can tell by your tone of voice that you are upset. I'd be glad to discuss this calmly at another time". And then invite an administrator to join in on that next conversation.
     
  16. BioAngel

    BioAngel Science Teacher - Grades 3-6

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    This totally! I hope you share this with your P - if a parent ever harasses a teacher at my school, we share it with our P and she will then take over and has outright told parents they can not talk to us like that.

    It's even completely okay to walk out of your classroom after telling this to me and go straight to the P's office. If they are not in there, take your stuff and leave.

    Parents can yell at their kids all they want to - teachers are not children and if a parent can't respectfully talk to you about their opinions then you do not have to listen to them.
     
  17. Obadiah

    Obadiah Groupie

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    I'm even wondering how the parents could go a whole month without knowing that their child was not in the Spanish program. Don't they talk to her? And if they were that excited about the program, why didn't they enquire about this during parents' night? I see some red flags popping up concerning this; but I'm glad they sent an apologetic email--then again, I wonder; if they were bold enough to appear in person such as they did, why are they afraid to apologize in person and mend the situation?

    Another (odd) thought came to my mind as I wrote this; I would agree with what was written above, working closely with the principal in this situation. Probably this is not the case, but sometimes parents will set teachers or schools up for a confrontation and then report this to the media. A relative of mine told me about how this happened in his local school system.
     
  18. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    I wondered about their awareness, too. It was odd they had barely figured this out. My guess is they possibly ran into a parent in the class, or their daughter mentioned the Spanish teacher who pops in every other day... instead of being in the class all the time. It was very odd and I hope it wasn't some weird set-up.
     
  19. mrachelle87

    mrachelle87 Fanatic

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    I will take some yelling, but never in front of students. My principal is great about shutting them down.
     
  20. missrebecca

    missrebecca Comrade

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    That is awful! I'm glad they sent an email apology, but I know I would never look at that parent with the same respect again.

    Walking out of the room or phoning an administrator for backup is probably the best move. You should never put up with verbal abuse.
     
  21. CindyBlue

    CindyBlue Cohort

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    Edited to add: Plus, I think your principal really needs to know!
     
  22. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    I'm sorry that you had to endure this. My concern is that the parents got down to your room in the first place. Parents would not be allowed in the rooms without checking in the office first and having an appointment first. The office would sure alert the teacher to the fact that they were sending parents down.
     
  23. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    I did notify my principal immediately after it happened (before finding someone to cry to). Normally, a parent would check in, but on a teacher work day no one was in the office. We also had some parent-teacher conferences going on, so people had access to the building.
     
  24. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    This is why I always kept my door locked, even during the school day.
     

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