Judge beating his daughter?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by kcjo13, Nov 2, 2011.

  1. INteacher

    INteacher Aficionado

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    Nov 7, 2011

    Still, nothing about these questions justify his actions. And so what if she was a spoiled brat, again how does that justify beating?? And who cares if the daughter is/was a lying, ungrateful, spoiled brat; she was beat and none of these questions have anything to do with what happened at that moment.
     
  2. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

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    Nov 7, 2011

    Cerek, I'm not intending to justify anyone's actions, but here are my own personal responses to your questions:

    1. Cerebral palsy and technology-I am most certainly not an expert in this disorder, but I do know that most types of CP affect gross motor function. Many times, assistive technology is beneficial to persons affected with CP. Did she NEED a computer, especially to be downloading illegal music? No, of course not. But in the video the father mentions using the computer to do her school work, as does the mother. Perhaps her "passion" was out of necessity.

    As for it being in her room-who knows. Maybe there was no other place to put it in the house, but there again, that's just speculation.

    2. The mother has participated in several interviews, and has stated that she was under the influence of her abusive husband. While it hasn't been brought up here, she has acknowledged her participation and has apologized.

    Nothing I have found tells Hillary's side of the story as to why she would stay with her father. Stockholm Syndrome? Everything I have found is from her father's statement, which is clearly one-sided.

    3. Why would she wait so long-again, Stockholm? Abusive or not, he is her father. She had to know that it was going to ruin him, and even for someone so evil, would she want to see her family in ruin?

    And finally, as INteacher said, why does it matter the reason she released the video? He beat her. Savagely. Nothing can justify that.

    The actions of an abuser are never justified.
     
  3. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

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    Nov 7, 2011

    Did I say the questions justify the father's actions? No. In fact, I've stated the exact opposite at least twice. That being said, I still feel it is always a good practice to get as many facts about any issue as possible.

    I still find it curious that she stayed with the father after her parents divorced. I can understand her staying when she felt like she had no other place to go, but after her mother left, one would certainly think she would have preferred living with her mother rather than her father.

    Of course, the statement that she stayed with the father has not been confirmed by the daughter or mother, so we only have one side suggesting that at this time.
     
  4. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Nov 7, 2011

    Cerek, we'll just call her a friend, but a friend of mine loves her father and considers him a rock in her life. And yet he would come into her room at night when she was a young child and molest her. Point is, who knows why some people remain in certain situations. Why some people accept things, forgive. Why this girl remained with her father. Why she finally revealed her abuse. I respect your desire to "investigate", but frankly I find it unnecessary when all some of us want to do is comment on the abuse itself. I am simply uninterested in the whole story, whether she's a brat, whether she's manipulating her father...instead, I am looking at this as an opportunity to consider or discuss the line between discipline and abuse. Not seeing the need to learn all of the details doens't mean I am jumping to conclusions or forming opinions unwisely.
     
  5. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

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    Nov 7, 2011

    I have no problem discussing the abuse itself. I think the discussion of the line between discipline and abuse is an excellent topic, especially in a situation like this.

    When Judge Adams first said "the whole story had not come out" and that the video "wasn't as bad as it looked", I fully expected any "story" he gave to make him look even more pathetic than he already did in the video and, for the most part, I still feel that way. Nothing done by his daughter justified the beating she was given by him and her mother, but his exceptionally long "statement" (3 pages, single spaced), did reveal a couple of interesting points that I have mentioned.

    IF the punishment had not been as severe and as grossly out-of-control, then the daughter's actions might have had a more compelling impact (IMO, anyway). While I don't feel anything she did justifies the punishment she received, I thing the points that caught my interest may be a side result of his abusive nature.

    While it is purely speculation on my part, it sounds like he tried to "make-up" for his abusive fits by giving her money and/or buying her things; paying for her college education, buying the Mercedes, etc. That fits part of the classic profile of an abuser. It also fits part of the classic profile of victim of abuse; accepting the gifts as signs that the abuser really loves her and doesn't mean to be abusive.

    I do think the daughter may have realized, as she has grown older, that the money and material gifts are nothing more than attempts to assuage whatever guilt her dad might feel for the abuse rather than signs of actual affection and finally decided it wasn't enough - he had to face the reality of his behavior. I have no problem with that and agree he needs to face consequences for what he has done, no matter how long ago the incident occurred.

    Also, the classic profile of victim and abuser does explain why the daughter chose to stay with the dad, even after the divorce. Of course, in HIS mind, he seems to have taken it as confirmation that his beatings weren't all that bad after all - just like he had always said.

    So, in this case, learning more facts simply fills in more of the picture that the video clearly presented. It does not justify his actions by any means and does not make her responsible for (or deserving of) the beatings she received. But it does fill in some gaps that were missing.
     

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