Judge beating his daughter?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by kcjo13, Nov 2, 2011.

  1. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2005
    Messages:
    4,395
    Likes Received:
    7

    Nov 2, 2011

  2.  
  3. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 2, 2011

    I heard the video, hubby watched it. Wow, is all I can say. What horrible, horrible parents. :(
     
  4. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2006
    Messages:
    7,946
    Likes Received:
    3

    Nov 3, 2011

    I wish I had not watched the video. My stomach hurts. Literally and truly.
     
  5. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2006
    Messages:
    27,534
    Likes Received:
    6

    Nov 3, 2011

    All I heard was the headline on the morning news--- way more than enough information for me.
     
  6. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2007
    Messages:
    17,362
    Likes Received:
    46

    Nov 3, 2011

    I'm ashamed that this happened in the state that I live in. And it was punishment for downloading illegal music???? Really? I'd hate to see what this monster did if she really did something horrible!

    And to think that he says he should keep his job!
     
  7. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2005
    Messages:
    4,395
    Likes Received:
    7

    Nov 3, 2011

    Yes, he said he "apologized", and it wasn't as bad as it looked on video. Yeah, for you maybe, you jerk. How can beating your child not be as bad as it looks?
     
  8. donziejo

    donziejo Devotee

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2009
    Messages:
    1,091
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 3, 2011

    beating and the extended use of the f word while he beats her, as discipline.....I'm sick over this.
     
  9. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2007
    Messages:
    17,362
    Likes Received:
    46

    Nov 3, 2011

    Because the words "I'm sorry" make everything better? Yeah right, Judge! He'd probably throw the book at a parent if this kind of case had been brought before him!
     
  10. BettyRubble

    BettyRubble Rookie

    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2011
    Messages:
    25
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 3, 2011

    Oh my gosh, that is awful!! My DH once slipped and mentioned getting beat pretty bad by his father but when I pressed him on it, he wouldn't say exactly what his dad did, but I feel like it was something like this and it makes me sick to my stomach. I could never EVER in a million years do that to my child nor would I stick around if my husband ever even THOUGHT about it.

    Sick, just sick.
     
  11. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2006
    Messages:
    7,946
    Likes Received:
    3

    Nov 3, 2011

    I am (still) so upset by the video that has been posted here (and all over the Internet and televsion).

    I listened today to a show host say the only problem she had with the video is that the daughter had a disability. It was shocking to hear someone admit to that opinion on television—obviously many parents use a belt on their children, but to think this was acceptable so long as the child (or teenager, as in this case) wasn't disabled left me even more down about it all.

    This was not at all about punishing or teaching the girl a lesson. This was about the father's sick, twisted need for control...it was about his anger, his problems. The cussing was worst of all...the way he spewed so many horrible words at her. Absolutely broke my heart. And how he came back in for more. I just can't shake that.

    I don't want to get too off track here, so tell me if I should start a new thread. But what do you all think about either whoopings in general or the specific use of belts? I was whooped with a belt, but it was not even remotely close to what was in this video. I hold absolutely no hard feelings about the belt because my father didn't get off on using it...he used it as a lesson, a warning. I'm not even suggesting I agree with that, but...that people actually think the way it was used in this case is acceptable under any circumstances baffles me.

    Sorry...I know I'm rambling...but that this man released a statement saying it seemed worse than it was and that the "whole" story would reveal itself :)confused:) just sickens me.
     
  12. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 3, 2011

  13. Irishdave

    Irishdave Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2007
    Messages:
    2,007
    Likes Received:
    12

    Nov 3, 2011

    I Disagree with the Dad 110% I am surprised that a Family court Judge would do this!
    No one deserves to be beat.
    We (parents) have all had trying times with our children. Times where we needed to count to 10 or 100 before dealing with a child, not much less with a teenager!
    I wonder just what is the whole story,
    I did not hear that she has a disability.

    If it had been me I would had left nothing but footprints as I left at 18 years old!
    BUT I just wonder why she waited so long to publish it?

    Allegedly she was cut off (no $$$) by the dad.
    Someone said that she drove a Mercedes, and that was cut off ....
    She said that something was the last straw, I can understand her feeling about her family life BUT still why so long, it has been 7 years.
    Some reasons for waiting:
    Was she waiting for college to be paid?
    She could have a battered child "wife" syndrome and felt she could not leave.
    If she is just mad at the dad for taking her car and money away this could have him fired and then where will the money come from,
    Could the judge have so much power that she felt she would not get "justice" because of a "Good ole boy" system?
    Maybe the psychology of this girl has be so formed by the dad that she is almost a chip off the old block and wants to hurt him as much as she can?​
    I wish we would be able to get the whole story as we know there are three sides to every story Hers, His and the truth! She seems to be the closest to the truth.
    :2cents:
     
  14. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2007
    Messages:
    2,052
    Likes Received:
    217

    Nov 3, 2011

    I think the judge is learning now some of the reasons why punishment is often not the best means of behavioral modification. You might not hold hard feelings, but many would, and she clearly did.
     
  15. Irishdave

    Irishdave Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2007
    Messages:
    2,007
    Likes Received:
    12

    Nov 3, 2011

    Well I just saw the Today story
    The dad does need some intervention
     
  16. KinderCowgirl

    KinderCowgirl Phenom

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2006
    Messages:
    4,858
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 3, 2011

    Or worse-let abusers off the hook because he didn't deem it as abuse-that's how he disciplined his own child.

    I read the posted article this morning, but knew I couldn't watch the video. They played it on the news without warning (which bothers me as well)-they said it contained material of a graphic nature as it was playing-so I did unintentionally see part of it.

    I had to change the radio station I listen to in the morning because so many people were actually defending this guy. I find the entire thing extremely disturbing. It really sickens me. How many times this also probably happened when it wasn't caught on tape.
     
  17. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 3, 2011

    ???? Defending him!!!!! :banghead::mad: I mean, it's one thing to spank or even hit with a belt...but the way he did it and cursed at her is just beyond acceptable.
     
  18. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2006
    Messages:
    7,946
    Likes Received:
    3

    Nov 3, 2011

    I agree, Peachy.

    And it's not so much the physical belt to body contact, but the hatred behind each blow, and the horrible words meant to make her feel less than. Defend that? Defend "I'll beat you into submission"? Defend his threat to belt her in the "f---ing face"? That's equally as twisted as the footage itself.
     
  19. bandnerdtx

    bandnerdtx Aficionado

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2007
    Messages:
    3,506
    Likes Received:
    12

    Nov 4, 2011

    That's what I thought, too, JustMe. I couldn't believe how viciously he was speaking to her... the profanity, the threats... It's sick.
     
  20. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2009
    Messages:
    3,094
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 4, 2011

    WOW! I watched the TODAY show video and they did not show that part of the video. They did tell the viewers theirs was much more graphic material on the video that they chose NOT to show on the air.

    There is still absolutely NO defense for even the little bit TODAY did show. Beating a 16-yr old girl with a belt, threatening to belt her in the face and beat her into submission? The man obviously has some serious anger-control problems and a very controllng personality.

    Also, it seems there would be more appropriate punishments he (and the wife) could have given. If the problem was her downloading illegal songs or videos, then take the computer away - problem solved.

    I also agree with KinderCowGirl about the man's judgment on the bench in Family Court. Since he can look in the camera with a straight face and claim the video "isn't as bad as it looks", I would be very concerned about him allowing levels of punishment or abuse in other homes as well, since he would think beating a child with a belt is acceptable discipline.

    As for the question JustMe asked earlier, I was whipped with a belt a few times growing up (but never more than 3 licks) and I've used as a belt as discipline too, when my boys were younger. I avoided addressing this question earlier because it is such a controversial topic here, but I think this provides a good venue for discussing the issue.

    Whenever corporal punishment is mentioned, many people label it as "beating" the child. I strongly disagree. This video shows a man beating his child with a belt, because he has let his anger get out of control and the abuse is verbal as well as physical. However, those of us who grew up in a time when spanking was allowed in school know that it CAN be done in a controlled manner that is NOT the same as "beating" the child.

    It isn't always the best punishment and normally acts only as a short-term deterrent. But when I see the discipline options used today (or the LACK of options), I have to wonder if they are any more effective as a long-term deterrent. Most kids don't seem very concerned about Silent Lunch, ISS or even OSS. The ones that receive suspensions usually don't care and see it as a day away from class (or school). Most students do NOT like Silent Lunch, but it still acts only as a short-term deterrent as well, in my experience.

    While I would never endorse corporal punishment becoming the standard punishment again, I have seen a few occasions where I think it would have been the most effective punishment at the time because the kid(s) involved weren't concerned at all about the normal consequences.
     
  21. SpecialPreskoo

    SpecialPreskoo Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2002
    Messages:
    5,034
    Likes Received:
    414

    Nov 4, 2011

    Well guess what. He won't be charged...

    http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/police-judge-charged-video-beating-14881056

    "A Texas family law judge whose daughter secretly videotaped him savagely beating her seven years ago won't face criminal charges because too much time has elapsed, police said.

    Aransas County Court-at-Law Judge William Adams likely would have been charged with causing injury to a child or other assault-related offenses for the 2004 beating of his then-16-year-old daughter, but the five-year statutes of limitations expired, Rockport Police Chief Tim Jayroe said Thursday."

    More article on the site.
     
  22. silverspoon65

    silverspoon65 Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2007
    Messages:
    2,403
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 4, 2011

    I know we will agree to disagree, but I am almost as disgusted with people on here justifying hitting a kid with a belt as I am with this judge. Just my two cents.
     
  23. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

    Joined:
    May 8, 2008
    Messages:
    8,453
    Likes Received:
    1,592

    Nov 4, 2011

    Sadly, I can understand the statute of limitations being a barrier in prosecuting this gentleman. The daughter should have pressed charges immediately but chose to withhold this information. However, I think the court of public opinion will be more than sufficient, especially since he is up for election.
     
  24. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2009
    Messages:
    3,094
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 4, 2011

    Unfortunately, he isn't due for re-election for three more years. Perhaps the public outcry will lead to an early resignation or an intervention from the City Council. Just because the statute of limitations has expired doesn't mean they can't find other ways to make him accountable.

    As KinderCowGirl pointed out, I would be very concerned about his ability to rule impartially on cases in Family Court given his idea of "acceptable punishment".
     
  25. SpecialPreskoo

    SpecialPreskoo Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2002
    Messages:
    5,034
    Likes Received:
    414

    Nov 4, 2011

    "Just because the statute of limitations has expired doesn't mean they can't find other ways to make him accountable."

    Exactly!

    I wonder if she could civil sue him.

    As for statute of limitation. She may have been scare to do or say anything until now. She finally got the strength to do someting.
     
  26. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2006
    Messages:
    7,946
    Likes Received:
    3

    Nov 4, 2011

    Just to ensure my stance is understood, I don't condone belting. I was belted, as I said, and I don't hold any sort of grudge...but that doesn't mean I would do the same to my child. And, again, my experience was far, far from hers.

    My statement that it's not so much the physical contact wasn't implying that it's not an issue, but I see the hate released with each lash and the verbal abuse as having a greater negative impact long-term. The physical pain fades...
     
  27. Speechy

    Speechy Comrade

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2011
    Messages:
    255
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 5, 2011

    Saw this yesterday. I watched the entire video and I wish I hadn't. I don't have words. The entire thing made me physically ill.

    Agreed completely. Hitting anyone, let alone a child with a disability, is not okay. And as for using a belt, whether it is two or three licks, or the whipping into submission that this girl got, that is not okay either.

    It just shudders me to think that this kind of discipline is still being used. What is more sickening is that next to nothing is being done about it.
     
  28. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2007
    Messages:
    17,362
    Likes Received:
    46

    Nov 5, 2011

    I've been reading that he's not going to be charged with anything.
     
  29. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2009
    Messages:
    3,094
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 5, 2011

    That is because most state laws allow a parent or guardian to use reasonable, physical force to punish or discipline their children.

    That means most states do not consider reasonable spanking or whipping the same as abuse.
     
  30. Speechy

    Speechy Comrade

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2011
    Messages:
    255
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 6, 2011

    I just don't see how any form of spanking, whipping, or hitting could ever be considered "reasonable", especially when it involves a child.
     
  31. kpa1b2

    kpa1b2 Aficionado

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2002
    Messages:
    3,274
    Likes Received:
    38

    Nov 6, 2011

    I've not seen the video. I don't want to see the video. There's a lot going on in this family. All sides need some help. Dad beats daughter with belt. Daughter secretly video tapes it (must be something recurring). Daughter waits 7 years, then when Dad threatens to take away her Mercedes she posts the video. IMO that sounds like a spolied brat, wait a minute, but she was beaten as a teenager. Things don't seem to add up. Dad of course should never have beaten her with a belt.

    We'll probably never know the full story.
     
  32. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2006
    Messages:
    7,946
    Likes Received:
    3

    Nov 6, 2011

    Yeah, I certainly get the impression she posted the video to get at her father, not to get him whatever therapy he may need. I just don't care about that...I would prefer the emphasis remain on his adbusive acts. And kpa, the abuse did become a fairly regular occurrence which is why she set up her camera...it had about thirty minutes of nothingness at the beginning because she read his clues which told her a beating was coming soon.
     
  33. INteacher

    INteacher Aficionado

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2007
    Messages:
    3,765
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 6, 2011

    NO full story is necessary - there is nothing that gives anyone the right to physically assualt anyone the way he did - nothing. It doesn't matter why she posted, why she taped it, or why she waited so long - NO full story necessary - she was beat. A person BEAT another person with an object multiple times in anger and with the intent to harm, end of story.
     
  34. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 6, 2011

    Totally agree.
     
  35. nstructor

    nstructor Cohort

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2010
    Messages:
    588
    Likes Received:
    46

    Nov 6, 2011

    And he's a judge for child abuse cases!!!!! I'm STILL sick about it!
     
  36. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2009
    Messages:
    3,094
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 6, 2011

    So, we don't need to know all the facts? One side of this (or any) story is all we need?

    I agree there is no justification for the beating he gave, but I would never say I didn't want or need to know all the facts in a situation.
     
  37. INteacher

    INteacher Aficionado

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2007
    Messages:
    3,765
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 6, 2011

    I am only responding to this video - please, I don't think I indicated anywhere in my post that I think one side of a story is sufficent in all cases. What I stand by is anyone coming up with a "fact" or story that changes any aspect of that video - someone beating someone under age and in his care, with an object, with the intent to harm, ( "beat you in your f**king face"), with anger as a guiding motitive. I watched and counted the blows, more than 15 to her calfs, thighs, what looked like once on the arm, watched him get ANOTHER belt and return to hit her again. Really, what story makes that ok?????
     
  38. kpa1b2

    kpa1b2 Aficionado

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2002
    Messages:
    3,274
    Likes Received:
    38

    Nov 6, 2011

    I NEVER said that it was ok for him to beat her. Just because I said that we would probably never get the full story doesn't mean that I thought it was okay for him to beat her.

    What I meant is we'll probably never know WHY he started the beatings to begin with. We'll probably never fully understand why the daughter felt the need to post the video know instead of sooner or later. We'll probably never know the full story.

    I didn't say that that makes it right. He was wrong to begin with. He was the adult.
     
  39. INteacher

    INteacher Aficionado

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2007
    Messages:
    3,765
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 6, 2011

    He started this beating because she illegally downloaded music and games from the internet. He says it repeatedly why he is beating her
     
  40. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Nov 6, 2011

    In this particular beating it was because of the music she downloaded. But I have a feeling that he has anger issues and tends to fly off the handle, which is why she set up the video tape.
     
  41. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2009
    Messages:
    3,094
    Likes Received:
    0

    Nov 6, 2011

    I've already stated the father's actions were unjustified, but the more I read about this case, the more questions I do have about the daughter.

    Question 1: In the description of the video, she says she has ataxic cerebral palsy "that led her to a passion for technology, which was strictly forbidden by her father’s backwards views."

    I've looked up ataxic cerebral palsy and (so far) have seen nothing associated with the disease that leads to "a passion for technology". It sounds more like a spoiled teenager trying to justify why she "has to have" a computer or other items.

    Also, if her father's backward views really forbade technology, then I doubt he would have let her have her own computer in her room to begin with. So that part is questionable.

    Question 2: Not a single word has been mentioned about the mother, even though she participated in the beating as well. Not just telling her daughter to "take it like a 16 year old", but actually taking the belt and hitting her daughter with it as well.

    The daughter has completely forgiven the mother and says the mother was "severely manipulated" into assisting in the beating. That's possible, of course, but when mom finally divorced dad and moved out, the daughter apparently decided to stay with dad (according to his released statement). Since mothers' usually get custody of the children, and since the father was such a monster, it certainly begs the question "Why did the daughter stay with him after the divorce?"

    Question 3: Why did it take the daughter so long to post the video? I watched her explanation on the TODAY Show. I can agree with her answer that she was too scared to post it while still living under his roof. That makes sense. But once she moved out, she was no longer directly under his power, so she could have posted it then. There has been some suggestion that she wanted to wait till she finished college because dad was paying the tuition. Again, I can understand that reasoning, but unless she had an extended college career, she would have been within a year of graduation by age 21. She would have been a legal adult and the statute of limitations would not have expired yet. Of course, there is always the concern that she would have to pay for the remaining college herself. So, again, I can understand the reasoning.

    Finally, according to the dad, she posted the video immediately after he told her to give him back the Mercedes she was driving. As a previous poster said, that sounds much more like the reaction of a spoiled kid than would that could no longer bear to keep this terrible incident a secret.

    Don't get me wrong, I've got no problem with her posting the video for no reason OTHER than "getting back at her father". Even though there are no legal ramifications available for his actions, he certainly should be held accountable for what he did and face other consequences, like losing his position as a Family Court judge. But that motive certainly does call into question the daughter's claim that she just wants to get help for her dad.

    So, even in this case (as well as any other), I think it is always a good idea to get as much of the story as possible.
     

Share This Page

Members Online Now

  1. waterfall,
  2. Ima Teacher,
  3. miss-m
Total: 219 (members: 5, guests: 188, robots: 26)
test