IVF While teaching

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Pinky12, Jul 26, 2013.

  1. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    Hello all.

    I am a second year teacher, and will unfortunately have to undergo more IVF treatments come September. We have had several IUI cycles beginning in March 2012, with no luck. We had our first IVF cycle in June 2013 and no luck again. Due to issues with my cycles being linked, I will not be able to do another cycle until August. If that one fails, I will be doing cycles during the school year.

    I'm very concerned as to how this will effect my job. When I did my cycle in June, I had to go to morning monitoring almost every day, making me 1 to 1.5 hours late to work every morning. The principal was very understanding since it was June, and we were mostly doing things like Field Day, trips, and other end of year activities. I'm not sure how she will respond to me constantly showing up late in the beginning of the year. I'm only a second year teacher and do not have tenure, and on top of that I teach a "testing grade".

    This whole process of trying to get pregnant has been so emotionally and physically draining for me. I don't know why our IUIs and IVF failed. I want to get pregnant so badly, but I also have a huge fear/guilt trip about this effecting my job. The hardest part is seeing the little kindergarteners at school, and wishing I could have one of my own. I guess I'm just looking for advice on how to handle IVF during the school year from teachers who have done it before. Thank you for reading.
     
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  3. dgpiaffeteach

    dgpiaffeteach Aficionado

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    I admit to knowing absolutely nothing about IVF but is it possible to go in at a different time or does it have to be in the morning? If it has to be the morning, what is the earliest appointment you can get compared to when school starts? Is it possible to have your planning time first thing in the morning?

    Those are my completely uneducated thoughts!
     
  4. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    One of our teachers has gone through several rounds of IVF over the past several years. She was open with our principal, and was able to arrange her daily schedule so that her prep period was first period of the day and she was able to be at school by the time her "teaching" time started each day.
     
  5. dmbfan36

    dmbfan36 Rookie

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    I have 2 friends at school that had to undergo fertility treatments. They went in the morning before school to give blood etc and then went for their actual appointment with the dr after school. Is this an option for you?
     
  6. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    This sounds like a really tough situation. I think that the only solution would be for you to 1) have first period planning AND 2) go to the appointments first thing in the morning. I have a pretty supportive supervising administrator, but I'm not sure that he would be able to allow me to be an hour and a half late every single day....
     
  7. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    I did IVF during the school year a few times. Have you met with your doctor to discuss why it didn't work? They need to share with you their thoughts and how they will change your protocol for the next round. We used embryo glue, so ask about that. You can also ask about baby asprin for any undetected clotting issues. It has mixed success rates, so it isn't used at every clinic. For the blood tests I was at the clinic early and waiting. The first nurse there would usually let me in and draw blood as soon as she got there and I could make it to school before it started or within a few minutes (a paraprofessional would step in). You can also ask if you can do the blood draw somewhere else that would be closer/faster or you could get to during lunch or prep time.

    Best of luck, hope you don't need to cycle during the school year :hugs:
     
  8. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    Thanks for the support guys. :)

    Morning monitoring opens at 6:30 AM, and I have to be at school by 8:00. Unfortunately, the hospital I go to is 45 minutes away from school, and is ALWAYS packed. Even so, bloodwork usually has no more than a 20 minute wait and I'm able to get back in time. The wait for the ultrasound is what takes forever, so I'm usually super late on days that I have both bloodwork and ultrasound.

    Our school's 3rd grade prep is always right after lunch, so I unfortunately won't be able to change that. I think the only thing I can do is pray that the August cycle works. If not, I'll have to talk to both my principal and my doctor before school starts to see what my options are. :unsure:
     
  9. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Do you have any specials first thing in am or maybe another teacher that you could switch with??? I know when I was pg my specials teacher's would help out, so I could leave to get to appts. Maybe check into that?

    Prayers that all goes well. I have a friend (not a teacher) going through same thing...
     
  10. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    Tasha,

    According to my doctor, it as an absolute mystery as to why my 7 IUIs didn't work. My husband had a low sperm count with low motility when we first started due to an infection, but his numbers increased after he took medication to clear up the infection. Other than that we have no other medical issues except for my hyperthyroidism, which I'm taking medication for.

    The IVF didn't work because my body did not respond to the medication. I was only able to produce 2 eggs, so our doctor decided to continue the rest of the treatment as an IUI instead of an IVF. This way, we won't waste one of our IVF cycles since insurance only pays for four cycles. She has no definite answers as to why my body didn't respond to the meds, but she thinks it may be due to my cycles being linked. She believes that I my body starts cycles before the previous ones are complete, so my ovaries never have a "resting" period. For August, I will be on an estrogen patch to give my ovaries a chance to rest between cycles.
     
  11. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Interesting Pinky... I have hypo... my midwife said the meds could make you more fertile. I know when my gram was trying to get pg they put her on thyroid meds (back in the old days). LOL!!!
     
  12. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Oh man, this is tough. There is no way I could make this work. Even I did get one period taken care of (which would change the schedule of several teachers), that still doesn't even buy me an hour. :(
     
  13. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    That's good that they are resting your ovaries, that's a really successful protocol for lots of people. :hugs:
     
  14. FarFromHome

    FarFromHome Connoisseur

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    I'm wondering about the same thing. I just had my second IUI last week, so I'm hoping to find out it was successful. If not, we will either try one more IUI, or stop trying for a while. I have after school groups every day of the week, so I will not easily be able to go after school. Luckily I teach music now, and I can just reschedule classes if I need to go during the school day. I'm just worried about having to reschedule them last minute.

    I'm considering doing one more IUI in August (if this one is unsuccessful) because my after school groups won't have started yet. If that one doesn't work, we're going to stop and I'm going to try and lose weight. I was already overweight and I think the clomid has caused me to gain even more weight. We're military, so we would have to get on a wait list for IVF.
     
  15. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    Can you do your monitoring at a different hospital or clinic? My sister uses an RE that is 6 hours away, but she uses a local lab for monitoring. They fax her RE the results.
     
  16. AdamnJakesMommy

    AdamnJakesMommy Habitué

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    I think even the most supportive of principals would not want a teacher out every day in the mornings, or even 2-3 days a week, etc. If I were you, I would stop the IVF/IUI stuff at the beginning of the school year OR somehow take a leave of absence to work on the treatments. That is unless you can somehow work it out with your current doctor/hospital to have blood drawn before school somewhere else, a much closer facility, and then have any subsequent follow up with the doctor after school.
     
  17. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    By the way, it's not every day forever. I think I went for bloodwork every day or two for 2.5 weeks.
     
  18. FarFromHome

    FarFromHome Connoisseur

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    I think the military doctors skip a lot of steps... this month I just went in for the IUI, and no other appointments. Last month I had an ultrasound early in my cycle and then the IUI. They don't tell me very much information either-I research online to answer a lot of my questions!

    If your comfortable talking with your principal about it again, I would just explain the situation and see or there's any way someone could cover your class for a little bit.
     
  19. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Oh, then I think that's much more doable. :)
     
  20. dmbfan36

    dmbfan36 Rookie

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    While it isn't an ideal situation, family and health comes first. When dealing with fertility issues you are often times held hostage to cycles and things that are beyond your control. It can feel as though waiting any longer is not a viable option. Also, while the beginning of they year is not ideal, there will never be an ideal time but summer and it can be almost impossible to wait for those 2 months every year and then just hope that it works.
     
  21. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    On the flip side, if you lose your job as a fairly new teacher without tenure because you have to take too much time off for an elective procedure, you might not be able to support your family at all. Just something to think about.
     
  22. dmbfan36

    dmbfan36 Rookie

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    Sorry I have to disagree. While it might seem like an "elective" procedure to you, to someone who cannot get pregnant on their own it is not elective it is a necessity. Trust me I would not elect to go through what I am going through. You make it seem like I have elected to get a face lift and now I need to pay the price. And where does it say you need to tell your employer what kind of medical treatment you are going for? That is considered a private matter and as long as you have Dr's notes, it can not be held against you.
     
  23. sue35

    sue35 Habitué

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    I will be honest, I could never have done IVF during the school year. My clinic is also 45 minutes away and I went in everyday for at least seven days for bloodwork and ultrasound. My clinic opened at 6:30 but it was kind of first come first serve. I got there by 6:15 and made sure I was at the door when they opened. But I still didnt get out there for enough time to have gotten to school.

    I was the opposite of you and got a lot of eggs but they were not great quality. We transferred two into a surrogate and it did not work. We will be trying again during the school year but using frozen eggs.

    I think you have to tell your principal and see if there is anything she/he can do to switch your schedule. Otherwise can you time it so do it over Christmas break? I don't see how else you can do it. We pushed ours back so it didn't run into school time.
     
  24. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    A problem could be, though, that the employer could require you to take either half or an entire sick day each morning you'd be late. And then, depending upon various factors, you'd be out of sick leave in as few as a few days. Unless FMLA comes into play...not very familiar with that.

    I've been informed IVF is an elective procedure (technically and legally...not emotionally).
     
  25. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    I didn't mean for this to turn into a debate. Let me go ahead and tell you that I have struggled with miscarriage and infertility, so I know the deal better than anyone. Even so, this is an elective procedure. It may be emotionally necessary, but it is not medically necessary in the same way that a lung transplant is.

    What is happening here is that a teacher is going to be making petty significant demands on a principal with regards to the daily schedule. The principal might be willing to work with the teacher on this, and I hope that that's what happens. In my reality, though, I think that's an unrealistic expectation. Most principals, even great ones, need their teachers to be at school as much as possible. If a teacher can't be there for medical reasons, then the teacher needs to be taking FMLA so that a sub can be brought in. Unless FMLA is in play, a principal can most definitely "hold it against" a teacher who is excessively absent. Excessive absenteeism is most definitely a terminable offense. That's the truth.

    I'm not making any judgment about this procedure or about the emotional state of a person who decides to do it. As I said before, I do understand the pain of not being able to conceive. I'm just trying to offer what I think is a valuable viewpoint on the matter. Not everything is sunshine and rainbows, and sometimes bosses aren't as supportive as we might like. I want to OP to be prepared for that and to have a contingency plan in place.
     
  26. MissCeliaB

    MissCeliaB Aficionado

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    I agree with this completely. We had a teacher one year who had a difficult pregnancy and was out all the time with this, that, or the other, mostly morning sickness, or fatigue, etc. She hadn't been working long enough to take any kind of special leave. I spent so many of my planning periods covering for her, which was especially difficult because I have my own issues with infertility (even with IVF I would probably die in childbirth or before, so I know that I will never have a child of my own, as there's no way I could afford a surrogate or IVF or anything as insurance doesn't cover it) and because I have several preps and sponsor a time-consuming club. She missed so many days and half-days that they started docking her pay because even with her disability insurance it wasn't enough to cover it. She also was not asked back the next year, and is having trouble finding work now. Remember that if IVF works, and you've used all of your sick days getting pregnant, you won't have any left for during pregnancy or when the baby comes. Really examine the district policy about how many sick days you get, and what happens if you go over those days.
     
  27. AdamnJakesMommy

    AdamnJakesMommy Habitué

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  28. AdamnJakesMommy

    AdamnJakesMommy Habitué

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    I got lucky with my district, I am a continuing first year teacher (I started after my internship ended in January of this year), I was hired about 2 weeks before I found out I was pregnant. I am NOT FMLA protected, they technically and legally do not have to give me any time off beyond my sick days to have my baby! Fortunately, I get 20 days paid leave and then up to ONE YEAR unpaid (leave of absence). The only catch is, they don't have to hold my position for me. I am guaranteed A POSITION, not necessarily MY position--that's still okay though because I would have a teaching position somewhere in the district.

    I plan on taking 10-12 weeks off and despite running the risk of losing my position, I'm confident I will be okay. My principal and I have a good rapport and she will not voluntarily look to replace me--only if she is told to, which I don't think will happen either.

    This is why I suggested a leave of absence, if that is possible, for the OP. This way she can fully focus on getting pregnant and take as much time as she needs to do so, without fear of losing a position in her district. Exceeding sick time balances while asking for coverage the first 2 hours of the day several days a week for possibly months and months (before she conceives) can be a heavy burden on the administration. It may not be at her school, but it would be at mine. They'd much rather prefer I be out and the put a LTS in there instead of having to scramble to find coverage for just a couple of hours.
     
  29. MissCeliaB

    MissCeliaB Aficionado

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    In our district, we cannot take leave time until we have been teaching for five years. The amount of leave allowed depends on how long you have been with the district. Other than that, for maternity leave we get our sick days, and if you have disability insurance and any kind of complications you can take a bit more, but you only get part pay. You are very lucky where you work. Many districts do not have such forgiving leave policies.
     
  30. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    Wow, that's crazy that the military doctors skip so many steps. How do they know when the optimal time for an IUI is if they don't do any ultrasounds or bloodwork beforehand? Sometimes I feel like my doctor doesn't give me a lot of info either, but when I try to research on my own it seems like not even medical science has the answers I'm looking for.


     
  31. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    So the unfortunate news is that I missed my July period completely, and won't be expecting my next one for another two weeks. I was supposed to do the Estrogen patch on my next period and do the IVF in August, but I'll have to push everything back and do the patch in August and the IVF in September. No answers as to why I missed my period this month. Grrrr... :mad:

    I talked to my sister a few nights ago about everything, and she told me that I'm welcome to stay at her place whenever I have morning monitoring. She's about ten minutes from the hospital, so while it won't make my commute to work easier, it'll let me sleep a little longer and stress less about getting to the hospital on time. I'm also going to make an appointment with my doctor and see if I can go somewhere local to do my bloodwork and have them fax the results in. As for the ultrasounds, I doubt they'll let me go anywhere else, but I'm going to look into trying to go right after school. Hopefully it all works out for me. Good luck to anyone else cycling this summer!
     
  32. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Is there any possibility that you may be pregnant now?
     
  33. FarFromHome

    FarFromHome Connoisseur

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    I just have to do an ovulation predictor kit. When I get a positive, then I call the hospital and they schedule the IUI for the next day. It probably makes my chances even lower for it to work...
     
  34. sue35

    sue35 Habitué

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    For me, the ultrasounds had to be in the morning so the doctor had enough time to analyze them and change my dosing accordingly. A nurse would call me every afternoon with my dosing for the night and next day. If your doctor is the same, I think you will have a problem getting afternoon ultrasound appointment.

    I do know a lot of doctors aren't as precise and do a general dosing the whole cycle so maybe you have that. I hope you can make it work:)
     
  35. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    I was really hoping that was the case, but a home pregnancy test and a blood test say otherwise :(

     
  36. sevenplus

    sevenplus Connoisseur

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    I'm sorry Pinky. It's all so hard. I haven't done ivf but I've done injectable meds that required daily morning blood draws and ultrasounds. Many days I managed to make it to school before the students arrived but it was very stressful. Other days I got my class covered.

    Something I haven't seen mentioned and didn't realize was an option until my principal told me: I was able to take a quarter day of sick time. (I had mistakenly thought I had to take the time in full or half day increments.)
     
  37. Pinky12

    Pinky12 Rookie

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    That's unbelievable to me that that is the best they can do for those that are serving and protecting our country. I hope that legislation is passed through that offers much better healthcare (and other benefits) for all of the families who are sacrificing themselves to keep us safe. Also, I REALLY hope it works out for you! My doctor told me that some people have no health issues, it's just a matter of timing, and for those people IUI really helps. Hope this is your case! :hugs:


     

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