It bothers me when teachers make up nicknames...

Discussion in 'Debate & Marathon Threads Archive' started by DrivingPigeon, Aug 12, 2014.

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  1. DrivingPigeon

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    I don't like when teachers have multiple students with the same name in their class, and they come up with a nickname for the child. For example, if there were 2 kids that go by Joseph, and the teacher decided (maybe s/he did ask the child) that one would be Joey. From then on that kid is known as Joey, even if his parents wanted him to be called Joseph. I don't think young children are always bold enough to say they don't like a nickname, and/or they don't realize that this may be a name that sticks with them for the rest of their lives.

    One teacher had 2 of my former students this past year: Alyssa and Elissa. Both girls pronounced their names the same: Uh-liss-uh. However, the class decided to call them (long)E-liss-uh, and (long)A-liss-uh. Now other children refer to them this way, but that's not how you are supposed to say their names. If I were their parents, I wouldn't be happy.

    I always just call children by their first name and last initial. This year I will have Claire A. and Claire B. I've found that these names don't stick with children. Next year the Claires will probably be in different classes, and everyone will just call them each Claire.

    To each their own, but I just wanted to put that though out there for the new school year. :)
     
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  3. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    I am curious to see others' comments. I have never known of a teacher to do this. I remember subbing a long time ago, there was a class that had a Taylor 1, Taylor 2, Taylor 3, and Taylor 4. Three of them had the same last initial :eek:

    I had three girls with the same name last year, and they were called by their first name and their full last name. I took over mid year, so this was the norm. At first I called them by their last initial, but I ended up getting so used to hearing their full names, I started saying it, too!

    One year I had a boy and a girl with a unisex name. They spelled it differently. (Think Carson and Karsyn) I always forgot to say their last initial because of both the spelling and the gender. At the end of the year I was still saying "Carson" and they both asked which one? In my subconscious brain it should have been obvious because they are spelled differently :lol:
     
  4. WindyCityGal606

    WindyCityGal606 Enthusiast

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    ...so tweedle dee and tweedle dum are a no no? haha...I had to do it! But seriously, I know what you mean. I know my school is pretty good about not doing exactly what you've explained but some of the students we get who transfer in from other schools have obviously been victims of this name change thing because there is no way in the world their parents could have intended their names be pronounced the way the child now says their name is pronounced! I think kids take those awful name changes beyond the school walls! One child we got in last year had a name that was pronounced nowhere near what it was spelled?!?
     
  5. mollydoll

    mollydoll Connoisseur

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    I had three girls with the same (kind of uncommon!) first name and last name (common). That was a challenge. I called them 1, 2, and 3 and told them to fight it out amongst themselves who was who.

    We just kind of rolled with it and had fun. I'm notoriously bad with names, so this did not help! I tell the kids that I'll try to know all their names by November, but that's a struggle for me.
     
  6. kpa1b2

    kpa1b2 Aficionado

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    One year I had multiple children with the same names, all spelled differently (Jaylyn, Jaylin, Jaylend, Justin, Justen, Alexis, Alexxis). I told them if I was looking at them that I was talking to you. When I needed to I added the last name.
     
  7. DrivingPigeon

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    I've done that, too. It's funny, though, because I seat them on separate sides of the room on purpose, and when I call on them, they go "Which one?" I'm looking RIGHT at you! :lol:
     
  8. TeacherNY

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    I had 2 students with the same name and I happened to be talking to one parent and mentioned it. She gave me a nickname to use for him so I was off the hook there. Except for that, I think I would ask the child if I could use a nickname. If they didn't want to do that I'd then resort to using the last initial but that seems like a pain. I don't see nicknames as a big deal unless it was actually offending someone.
     
  9. TeacherNY

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    I do remember in one high school class there were 4 girls with my name so the teacher just gave up and pointed to us if she wanted to identify who she was speaking to LOL Poor lady!
     
  10. dgpiaffeteach

    dgpiaffeteach Aficionado

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    I have about eight Madison's this year. All spelled differently. I'm not sure how we'll work it out.

    I dislike when kids tell you they don't care. Please just give me a name to call you. Please. And don't tell me "Joseph" is cool and then write "Joey" on all your papers. It just confuses me.

    I had a girl named "Firefly" (not real but it was an insect) and I got a paper with the name "Tiffany" on it. I had asked her if she went by something else. She said no. So then I had to ask the whole class who Tiffany was.
     
  11. WindyCityGal606

    WindyCityGal606 Enthusiast

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    :lol::lol::lol::lol:KIDS!! yeah...they do that to me too.....:confused:
     
  12. chemteach55

    chemteach55 Connoisseur

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    As a parent I hate that my son's name was shortened by his teachers. His name is Timothy--that is what he was named but only very immediate family calls him that anymore. His kindergarten teacher shortened it to Tim and no matter how many times I corrected them--Tim is what stuck.
     
  13. TeacherNY

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    It's amazing how people name their kids. They think the "IT" name is so cool and don't realize that 999 other kids have the same name in the school!!! If I had that many Madisons (I detest that name) I'd shoot myself!
     
  14. chitown

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    I see your point and somewhat agree with you. I would never intentionally mispronounce a student's name to make it easier on myself and the class, that's just awful. Whenever I have students with long names that typically have a short form (Joseph and Joey or Joe) I call them by their proper name and ask if they go by that or another form of it (I never suggest a nickname). Their parents might like them to go by Joseph, but they might prefer Joe. Why can't they be their own person in my classroom?

    And just to continue playing devil's advocate, I named my youngest son specifically for his nickname. I wanted to name him Finn but my husband and I didn't like the way it sounded with middle names, so we went with a longer form-Griffin-and we just call him Finn. When he went into school, the teacher asked me what he was going to be called and I asked him. After 3 years of being called Finn or Finny (a pet name that I would never expect a teacher to use!) he decided he wanted to be called Griffin at school. One day he may decide he wants to go by Griff or something else, and I won't really care as long as he's comfortable with it. Of course, if he had a teacher who gave him a nickname he didn't like and he was too afraid to say anything about it, I would go to bat for him to get it changed. I would hope the teacher would respect that. I would not be okay with a teacher making up a different pronunciation of his name.

    As for the first name last initial, it's not a method that I'm fond of but I think it's the best choice in most multiple name situations. I had three Omars and two Mayas in one of my classes last year and they went by first name last initial. Whenever possible, I would just call them by their first name and make eye contact because I feel that's more personal (they all sat in different areas of the classroom). I hated being Allison R. when I was in school but it could have something to do with the fact that I was the only Allison until 8th grade.

    Like you said, to each his own! It is definitely something to consider with the beginning of the school year approaching though, just because I'd be okay with it doesn't mean my students (or their parents) are.
     
  15. TeacherNY

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    I think Finn and Griffin are kinda cool!
    Not sure about why there were so many Omars LOL
     
  16. DrivingPigeon

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    I have had parents do that before, which is nice!
     
  17. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    I just remembered- there are a few times when I have been guilty of shortening a child's name. My sister has a semi-long name, goes by a nickname, and I actually call her just a syllable. (Think Nicole, Nikki, Nik) I've had two kids with her name, and they always get called the syllable when I'm distracted/busy. Whoops.


    Speaking of my sister, she was mad when her baby's name started going up the popularity charts. My cousin just had the same thing, too. They may have popular names in school, but their parents definitely didn't plan it that way.
     
  18. chitown

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    I worked at a school where at least half of the students had an Arabic background, so there were a lot of names that I had never encountered before, and sometimes several kids with those names.
     
  19. KinderCowgirl

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    I have a thing about calling them by and requiring the kids to write their proper names. I ran into an issue with 3 sets of duplicates a few years ago and would, especially when we were in a hurry just call them by their last names and that stuck. Which I figured out afterward was probably not a good thing. The kids would make up their own as well, which I didn't have whole lot of control over. I had 2 "Jasmines" one year and one became "Little Jasmine" to her kids (you mean Little Jasmine?)-which she didn't mind at all, but it did bother me a little bit.
     
  20. teach1

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    :dizzy::eek:hmy: Personally, I think this is really inappropriate. Why does this teacher have the right to change the students' names!?

    As for the rest of the topic, I think it's pretty hard... especially when you are dealing with 3+ students with the same names. When children are in elementary, I think the best bet is to have parents and child decide together what they the child to be called. Take the name Victoria for example. I can think of 3 people I know that all prefer their name different ways... Victoria, Vicky, Tori. However, if they all wanted it the same way, I think I would go with Tori Smith, Tori Jones, Tori Davids.
     
  21. txmomteacher2

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    Totally understand. My son's name is Christopher. Before he even started school he was in daycare and there was another Christopher. They started calling him Chris. The funny thing is , a few days after he was born we were at my parents house. My Dad said " oh Chris what a handsome boy!" I said " I named him Christopher please call him that. If,I wanted a Chris that's what I would have named him!" Then he gets to school and they call him Chris. Of course at home he is still Christopher and most time these days he is Christopher Dylan because he is 17 and always in trouble. Lol.
     
  22. gr3teacher

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    I had two "Jason B's" for the second half of the year. I told them to figure out amongst themselves what they wanted to be called. They decided to go by full first and last name. Worked for me.
     
  23. TeacherNY

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    In school I was called by my full name but for some reason my siblings just do the syllable thing. Why, I have no idea. I think I just have really lazy siblings LOL I personally don't like the nickname associated with my name.

    As to the popularity charts, 2 of my relatives (on different sides of the family) named their daughter a name that was number 1 or 2 that year. Then when they went to a wedding they were shocked to find out their daughters had the same name. Really?? Where have they been? If you don't want your kid to have the same name as everyone else then pick a more unique name!
     
  24. gr3teacher

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    Some names become popular, seemingly out of nowhere. Like Madison... it shot up to popularity in the 2000's, and is already starting to drop. We're also about to hit a major run of Isabella's... although that one is probably more due to that godforsaken movie that shall not be named.
     
  25. mrachelle87

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    I have two Alex-a boy and a girl...two kayden and Kaiden, 14 boys and 4 girls...we will be lucky if I get any of their names right. Oh, I have one that decided to go by his middle name this year. Every teacher he met yesterday had to be corrected on his new name. He is a stinker, so all of the teachers knew his first name. I told my husband it was an AKA case, but it wasn't going to work. He was at school for twenty minutes and he got in trouble three times!
     
  26. MissCeliaB

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    I have over 200 students on my roster, and many students prefer to go by a nickname instead of their given name. Right now everyone is "sweetie" or "dear" until I figure out who everyone is...
     
  27. dgpiaffeteach

    dgpiaffeteach Aficionado

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    Curious question-for parents who prefer to call their kids by their full names, do you get mad if they choose to go by a shortened version? If I ever have a boy, his name will be William. It's both our dads' names. We'll call him Liam though, but it wouldn't bother me if one day he chose to go by Will or something.

    We have a couple teachers who believe that names that end in "y" aren't man enough (Joey, bobby, etc...) so they shorten them to just Joe or Bob. I really dislike that.
     
  28. TeacherNY

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    Aww, I think Joey is a cute name.
    My ex fiancé always liked to be called by his nickname but his grandmother was furious if everyone did not call him by his full name. I have no idea why she cared. I ended up not calling him anything when we were with her in fear of her correcting me (thank goodness he's an ex LOL).
     
  29. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    When I have kids that have the same first names I use their entire name. Or their first name and look straight at them, they usually know who I'm talking to! :)
     
  30. MissCeliaB

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    I usually call students by what they ask to be called, as long as it is appropriate. I also use what they write on their papers.
     
  31. TeacherNY

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    That seems like a good idea. I do remember one kid in high school who had a Chinese first name (nobody could pronounce it or spell it) and just wanted to be called "Matt". He said he just wanted to have a more "normal" name. No teachers had a problem with it.
     
  32. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    I haven't had too many instances where I've had to worry about this. When I taught high school, I would normally call the boys by their last names anyway (they didn't mind) so that eliminated any confusion for if two boys did have the same first name. And I didn't have any girls with the same name in the same class.

    When I was pregnant with my daughter, there was a couple at my in-laws church that loved the first and middle name so much, they asked if they could name their daughter the same. I didn't have a problem with it. It was a compliment! But now on the few times they go to Sunday school together, it can be hard for the teacher! I call her by the shortened version of her name, everyone else calls her by her full first name.
     
  33. TeacherNY

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    Did you tell everyone what you were going to name her before she was born?? In my family it's usually a closely guarded secret until the baby is born. A funny thing is that in my family one of my cousins had a baby girl and named her the name that I had (thought) I made up which is kind of a play on our maiden names. She never mentioned it beforehand but I'm kind of bummed that she used the name since now I can't use it if I ever have a girl :lol:
     
  34. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    We did tell family members what we were naming her before she was born. Girl name was picked out almost immediately. Good thing we didn't have a boy!
     
  35. txmomteacher2

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    My oldest son is the older grandson on my husbands side of the family. All the cousins got mad at us for naming our son after the Grandfather that had passed away. I knew the minute we found out I was pregnant that if it was a boy he would be named after his great grandfather and his great uncle. Two very influential men in mine and my husbands lives.
     
  36. TeacherNY

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    In a lot of families I know it's typical for the oldest grandchild to be named after a grandfather or other family member. After that they are out of luck or use the same name with a different middle name LOL Most of my cousins have their OWN first name and their middle names are family members' names. I personally have the first name (female version) of my grandfather and the middle name of my grandmother. My siblings' first names were just out of my mom's head but their middle names are relatives' names. I can just imagine having 5 cousins named William just because all the relatives fought over great grandpa's name :lol:
     
  37. 2ndTimeAround

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    a coworker of mine had a big problem with a parent over this issue. She asks students on the first day what name they prefer and calls them by that one. Coworker emailed a mother one day about a student's absences and referred to the child by the name she had been calling him. Something like Al instead of Allen. A typical truncated version of the given name.

    The mother had a fit. Responded in all caps and copied the response to the principal. The teacher asked the student what was going on. In her opinion (and mine), if a student requests a nickname, she was going to honor it. Turned out that the young man (15 or 16) was named after his father. The father died when the boy was an infant and the mother wanted the father's name to continue. Dad went by Allen, so the boy would too. The boy said he really wanted to be called Al in class, not Allen.

    So the teacher continued using Al, as the boy requested. In her emails to the mother, she used Allen to keep peace. The mother found out that the teacher was using "Al" still and actually went screaming to the superintendent about the whole issue. She also wrote about it in the comments section of our local tv station. The kid was a great kid and that was a hill my coworker was willing to die on.
     
  38. TeacherNY

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    Poor kid. I can just see this mother yelling at her son's boss in 10 years for calling him Al :dizzy:
     
  39. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    My sister actually hates when you call her by her full name. It has to be the nickname or the syllable.

    There really isn't a nickname for my name. Once I had baby cousins, my name actually got longer. (I was like 19 or 20) They added an 'ie' to the end of it. It bothered me at first, but now I've gotten used to it. With my niece, I actually refer to myself as Aunt newnickname :lol:
     
  40. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    I knew what my niece's name was going to be for nearly a decade. She is 5 months old! The middle name was an argument for my sister and her husband. Then he went and had her initials tattooed on his arm before they agreed- with the middle name he wanted. I told my sister that I would have written her preferred middle name on the birth certificate to spite him. (My BIL is an idiot, as proven by my last few sentences.)
     
  41. amakaye

    amakaye Enthusiast

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    I have one of those names that shot to popularity out of nowhere. My parents did not choose it because it was popular; in fact, they didn't know anyone else with the name and that was part of why they liked it--they didn't want a super trendy name.

    And then I got to school--a small school, with only one class per grade, and there was another girl with the same first name. The custom there was to use first name, last initial. Unfortunately, my middle name is the same as my last initial, so as a little kindergartner being called "Sally B.", I thought I was being called Sally Bea" and was in trouble! (And I was a pleaser who was never in trouble, so this was a big problem for me.) It took my mom a few days to figure out what was going on.

    Also, my cousin is 6 months older than me, and my aunt (unknowingly) used the same first name my parents had picked out. They chose a different one. :)
     
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