Is there anyone intersted in looking at my cover letter?

Discussion in 'Job Seekers' started by Peachyness, Jun 4, 2009.

  1. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Jun 4, 2009

    Thanks for taking the time to read this. Any suggestions would be great. I still want to go to school full time, but I might as well at least go through the screening.

    Dear HR chick,

    I am interested in applying for a teaching position in ABC City School District. In my four years as a teacher, I have successfully taught at both ends of the elementary school spectrum. This year, almost all of my kindergarten students had reached either challenge or proficient on the end of the year benchmark assessment. My 2007-2008 fifth grade class had shown remarkable improvement in their reading assessment scores and in their daily writing assignments. All of my students have shown remarkable growth and, above all, enjoyed their year in my class.



    I will bring effective techniques in teaching styles and behavior management to any classroom in which I may be placed. For example, in my fifth grade class, I implemented a “classroom economy” unit in which students earned classroom money (“Tiger Bucks“) through achieving high grades on assignments and fulfilling classroom duties. This year-long unit helps to motivate students academically while encouraging character growth and good citizenship. In addition, I utilized P.A.T. (Preferred Activity Time) to teach students about time management skills. I also implemented Reader’s and Writer’s workshop where I conferenced with students daily to individualize instruction. This past year, I implemented an EDI method, TAPPLE. TAPPLE (teach, ask, pause, pick a nonvolunteer, listen, and effective feedback) helped my students to take a more active role in the classroom. Students became more aware of their learning and all students were expected to think. In addition, it held all students accountable for their education.



    I am excited at the prospect of working with the students and teachers again in the ABC City School District. I would like to meet with you to discuss my qualifications for the teaching positions that will become available for the 2009-2010 school year. Thank you for your time and consideration.

    Sincerely,




    Peachness
     
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  3. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Jun 4, 2009

    I think I would re-think the "HR chick" .....:lol: I kid. I know you wouldn't do that. I like it, though I might spell out EDI.
     
  4. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    :D I dunno.. I'm sure she would get a kick out of it! :D
     
  5. Kangaroo22

    Kangaroo22 Virtuoso

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    Jun 5, 2009

    I think it looks great, Peachy! And I totally vote to keep the "HR chick" in there!
     
  6. Alisha

    Alisha Cohort

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    Jun 5, 2009

    Very nice ! I vote to keep the "HR chick" in there too, maybe you'll apply to a district with a good sense of humor ;).
     
  7. NEFLteacher

    NEFLteacher Rookie

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    Jun 5, 2009

    i like how you included strategies that worked for you class.
     
  8. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Thanks everyone!! I feel better now about it. I think I'll change it back to her name. She may have a good sense of humor, but, you know! :D
     
  9. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Jun 5, 2009

    What do you know about the district?
     
  10. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Well, I've worked there for two years now, sooooo.,... nothing much. :D
     
  11. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Jun 5, 2009

    That wasn't obvious from your letter, Peachy - one gets very little sense of the district or of how you see yourself meeting the district's needs.

    One grammar error (I'm afraid you stumbled on one of my sore points:

    You've used a couple of what, in the grammar biz, are called past perfects. People tend to use them in the belief that they are more sophisticated versions of the present participle, but they're not.

    An important use of the past perfect is to view, from the point of view of an event in the past, an event that happened even earlier: Before the trolley doors had even opened, the crowd surged forward.

    Since this year is still this year and your K kiddies' performance is still fresh and relevant, you want the present perfect: Almost all my kindergartners have attained...

    Last year is over and done with and doesn't have much to do with next year for anyone, so there you want the simple past: My 2007-2008 class showed...
     

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