Immaturity!

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by MrsPatten, Aug 15, 2007.

  1. MrsPatten

    MrsPatten Comrade

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    Aug 15, 2007

    I have a certain first grade student who is incredibly immature!! He whines about *everything* under the sun. The first day of school our schedule was disrupted and he needed to go buy snack but there wasn't time. The only way I could get him to pack up was to promise I'd tell his mom (who was picking him up that day) that he didn't have time to buy snack and maybe they could stop and get him something--he had already proclaimed they didn't have anything at home. He won't do his work or pay attention during whole group instruction--he barely pays attention in small group. DAH! How do you "speed mature" a child like that? Or do you just medicate yourself and hope to survive the year?
     
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  3. knitchic

    knitchic Rookie

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    Aug 15, 2007

    Oh, I can't stand it when students whine!!! Last year I made it clear that I do not respond to whiny requests, and then we modeled different ways to ask a question (whiny vs. respectful). The students thought it was so hilarious when I modeled what the whining sounded like to me and then I asked them to give me different ways to ask the same question. After this talk, whenever a student whined to me I would calmly say "You know I don't respond when you speak in that tone."

    It worked fairly well, although there were still some students who resorted to whining occasionally.

    If he continues to be really disruptive, you could start a daily time table notebook with this student, where you have the day broken down into half hour segments, and then you make a happy or sad face next to each segment depending on his behavior during that time. You could decide on a good motivating reward activity that would be based on how his behavior stacks up over the week.
     
  4. Mrs.SLF

    Mrs.SLF Comrade

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    Aug 15, 2007

    Just a thought, the student may be immature right now but this is the start of the year and he is essentially like a kindergartner. I agree with the above post with suggestions to curb the behavior but I also remember having the same type of problem last year. It simply took time for the students to act older. I'm not trying to make excuses but recognize that he is not the most mature student because of his age.
     
  5. Erin Elizabeth

    Erin Elizabeth Groupie

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    Aug 15, 2007

    I had a few like that at the start of last year. After about a month they improved greatly. Remember, they are 6 years old, have just gotten back into a structured routine after a summer full of who knows what, and last time they had school it was only half a day! I would give this child a few weeks to transition back into the swing of things before trying an individual behavior plan. How long has your school been in session?
     
  6. combo teacher

    combo teacher Rookie

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    Aug 15, 2007

    Comic relief only---when a boy in my 4th/5th grades class whines, I turn to the girls and say, "A whining boy turns into.....and the girls finish with ....a whining man:lol:

    The boys tend to stop whining quickly.
     
  7. hawkteacher

    hawkteacher Comrade

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    Aug 16, 2007

    I agree with other posters that this child may just need a little time to re-adjust to school. Suddenly, they are no longer the center of the universe . . . which can lead to whining!

    When students use a whiny voice with me, I pretend that I don't understand them. I say, "Oh, I'm sorry, but I can't understand you when you use such a whiny voice. If you have something important to tell me, you can use a normal voice."

    That usually does the trick.
     
  8. kindernj123

    kindernj123 Companion

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    Aug 16, 2007

    Time and proper discipline will mature the student. The other posters are correct. This child may have a late birthday or just be immature.
     
  9. KRaeLamb

    KRaeLamb Rookie

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    Aug 16, 2007

    Love it...Love it...Love it!!!!!!:lol:
     
  10. BabyAngel

    BabyAngel Rookie

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    Aug 16, 2007

    I agree with the fact that time and proper discipline will help to mature this child. Also important to remember is that you can't do anything about how Mom and Dad handle this child at home, and that will affect how he behaves in school.

    I had a terrible whiner last year - and I taught 7th graders! When I met Mom and spoke to her, I instantly understood. She still treated him like he was in kindergarten and was under the impression that he was that "innocent".

    I tried everything to break him of the whining, as did the teacher who had him the year before. Nothing worked. Sadly, it didn't take me long to get to the point where I couldn't stand the boy.
     
  11. MrsCase

    MrsCase Rookie

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    Aug 16, 2007

    I tell my students right away that " I don't speak whinese" (WHINE-ESE) and that if they want me to treat them like little babies that's fine, but if they want to be treated like young men and young ladies, then they must act like one! Therefore, whining is definitely prohibited in my classroom. If one of them gets into whining, I politely say "I'm sorry, but I don't speak whinese...can you please repeat that in plain English?" Works every time!!
     
  12. bonneb

    bonneb Fanatic

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    Aug 16, 2007

    Be patient - there is no "speed mature" button unfortunately! I just took a class about brain development, developmental stages, and application of recent neuroscience in the classroom. He is where he is. You are going to have to be firm and consistent as he works through developmental stages.

    But, you do set the tone for your classroom and you do have the authority to ban whining. You can break a child of whining. I explain carefully to the child in a private talk that whining is not allowed in first grade. When he next whines, I will say, "Ask me again in a first grader voice," or "Try that again." Good luck! Keep encouraging him, he is really very young. I think we forget how much they change between the beginning of the year and the end, and I know I start each year shocked at the immaturity of the group because I am thinking they should be where the last group left off!
     
  13. becky

    becky Enthusiast

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    Aug 16, 2007

    Wait, though. Here's another possibility you might not have thought of. In our grade 1-4 Children's Ministry class we had this silly, whiny, immature, 7 yr old handful of a boy. He had two sisters ages 6 and 9 that weren't much better. Every week he was disruptive, wouldn't listen, bugged for snacktime, etc. The sisters- ditto. Come to find out, their home life was a trip. The dad was a gruff bully and their mom was a flaming drunk. I guess they were trying to change, but it all fell apart. They came into church this one week late last month, all wound up, couldn't sit still, and the boy would actually curl up into the fetal position on the floor. Normally, he'd just yank his shirt up over his face when he was frustrated. This week they told me their mom had been out all night at the bar, their dad was mad and took it out on them, and she was going back to the bar that day. They have left our church now. It's just something to think about when this kind of behavior comes up..
     
  14. TulipsGirl

    TulipsGirl Cohort

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    Aug 16, 2007

    Other phrases you can use...

    "I'll be happy to listen when your tone is pleasant."

    For a child who screams/whines/demands...
    "I'll be happy to listen when your voice is as calm as mine."
    (It's all about modeling....)
     
  15. kpa1b2

    kpa1b2 Aficionado

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    Aug 17, 2007

    I had a 3rd grader who was very whiney. I went on vacation, found a sign that said no whining, It had the word whining in a red circle with a line through it. I told her that I saw the sign & thought of her. I posted it in my room. When she would start to whine, I would just point at the sign. She stopped whining after that.

    She comes back to visit me & to make sure that the sign is still up.
     
  16. bonneb

    bonneb Fanatic

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    Aug 17, 2007

    That's sweet.
     

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