I'm getting married!....now how do I tell my kids?

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by newteachfl, Aug 6, 2008.

  1. newteachfl

    newteachfl Companion

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    Aug 6, 2008

    I've been trying to figure this out since I got engaged. My kids last year figured it out when the girls saw the ring that all the sudden appeared on my finger. But what about the new kids I'll get getting this year? I figure I have to tell them because the wedding is during the school year and I'll be taking 5 days for the honeymoon. How do I tell them? Or should I just keep them in the dark? I KNOW they'll ask where I was for that week and I don't want them to be upset that I didn't tell them I was getting married (my girls last year couldn't believe I wouldn't tell them I got engaged and that they had to figure it out on their own lol)

    And what about the name change? I figure for this year I'll let them call me either name...usually I'm just "ms" anyway. I'm sure other people have had this happen, how did you handle it?
     
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  3. teacherpippi

    teacherpippi Habitué

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    What grade do you teach?
     
  4. LoVe 2 TcH

    LoVe 2 TcH Companion

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    Aug 6, 2008

    What grade do you teach? I think this depends a lot on how you should tell them.

    Personally, I would tell them... Do a get to know you activity and everyone shares something interesting.

    Also, let the parents know at Back to School night that you will be gone for a week, so they are not suprised.
     
  5. newteachfl

    newteachfl Companion

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    3rd
     
  6. trayums

    trayums Enthusiast

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    I was totally honest with the kids and parents and was excited to tell them that I was getting married. Mine wasn't during the school year but RIGHT after we got out of school. They were SOOO excited for us and I actually invited them to the church and almost half of them came! I have some adorable pictures of me and my new husband in our garb with the kiddos! I will treasure them forever.
    The parents threw me a surprise shower and everything. It was amazing.
    I don't think you need to be nervous about telling them! I'm sure they will be just as happy for you as you are.
     
  7. trayums

    trayums Enthusiast

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    Congratulations by the way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Enjoy the day it goes way too fast.
     
  8. teacherpippi

    teacherpippi Habitué

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    Have you started yet? I would just add it as part of your introductions and getting to know them/them getting to know you conversations.

    Congratulations :wub:!
     
  9. MsMaggs

    MsMaggs Comrade

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    I was engaged last year when I started and will still be engaged this year (we're planning a June 2009 wedding). I wouldn't stress about it, it wasn't a big deal for my kiddos. They asked if I was married during our get-to-know eachother sessions and I told them I wasn't, but that I was engaged and would be getting married within the next two years. Mine were 5th graders and this was an acceptable answer to them. The girls kept asking throughout the year "When is the wedding?!? Can we come?!?" ;-)
     
  10. SweetHomeAlabam

    SweetHomeAlabam Companion

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    :wub::wub:Kids are smart and at the 3rd Grade level (my son is in 3rd this year) they have a pretty good understanding of what "married" means (to a limited extent of course).
    I would tell them. They will be excited with you. Kids love to feel excited and loved, this will show them the adult side of it!
    oh and CONGRATS!:wub::wub:
     
  11. LAH2

    LAH2 Companion

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    I got married in March of 2007. At the beginning of the school year I didn't tell my students, but I did tell the parents at Back to School Night (since I would be out of school for a week on my honeymoon). The kids eventually found out from their parents so I didn't have to announce it or explain it to them. We did talk about it as a class as the wedding got closer though. I was going to just keep my maiden name for the rest of the school year because I thought it would be easier for the kids, but the funny thing was that the students and parents automatically started calling me by my married name. Some parents even corrected me when I called them on the phone and used my maiden name!
     
  12. mrsbrown2007

    mrsbrown2007 Rookie

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    I would definitely tell them! Will you be changing your name? Last year, a ESOL teacher got married and the kids loved having to remember her name. Someone would say, "Oh Miss Blank" is coming and the other kids would laugh and say, "Her name changed because she got married, it's Mrs. Blank now."
     
  13. lteach2

    lteach2 Cohort

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    I just got married 3 weeks ago. Lots of people knew though. I will be changing my name, so even in my back to school letter I said something like "Many of you may have known me as Ms. ..."
     
  14. Scout About

    Scout About Rookie

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    I'm not sure why you are hesitant about telling the kids you're getting married. It's a perfectly normal thing to do. If you send a parent letter home before school starts, I would tell the parents there, and then I would tell the kids on the first day of school during introductions. The parents will probably want to give you a shower, if they're anything like the parents at my school.
     
  15. Nicole S.

    Nicole S. Rookie

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    I would tell your class that you are getting married. I had a friend who got married during the school year (November) and she taught first grade. She got the class involved with her name change. Each week from the beginning of school she would put a new letter up. She had 11 letters and the last letter went up, when she came back from the wedding. She kids totally understood it!
     
  16. Jem

    Jem Aficionado

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    I invited my kids to my wedding, so they obviously knew. Some cared, some didn't. I didn't talk about it all the time, but if they asked, I certainly answered their questions. I never knew anyone who got married when I was a kid, so sometimes it might be the only wedding they've heard of.

    Bottom Picture: http://www.mrs.uppman.com/7.html
     
  17. Alisha

    Alisha Cohort

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    Jem, I LOVE the wedding picture with your students!
     
  18. newteachfl

    newteachfl Companion

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    Thanks for the advice.

    I wouldn't say I was worried about it, more just curious...is it any of their business? I know they'll be curious and very supportive (at least my kids last year were---at least once a week I'd hear "are you married yet?!?"---I don't think they had any grasp of what an engagement was until I explained it. And even then they didn't understand why it was taking so long)

    But I guess you're right in that it's most likely will easily come up during introductions. It just wasn't something I wanted to dwell on. I try to avoid talking about my personal life, but perhaps I should be a little more open.
     
  19. Jem

    Jem Aficionado

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    I think it's great to pull your kids into stuff like that, as long as it doesn't take away the focus of academics. When I'm pregnant, after I'm far enough along that hopefully miscarriages aren't a huge worry anymore (although I know they can always happen), I want to show my kids pictures of each stage and talk about it with them. Obviously trying to stay away from the tricky stuff, but it's so cool when they understand what you are going through. Especially 3rd graders. They are def. old enough. You could even do a study on the place where you are honeymooning, and send them a postcard, and bring them back little gifts or something.
     
  20. Vievers

    Vievers Rookie

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    I student taught in 3rd grade and I told them at the beginning of the year when we did "Backpack Introductions" (activity where you fill a backpack with things important to you to tell other about you). I had a picture of my fiance and told them I would be getting married in Jan. I finished student teaching in Dec. but sent pictures to the class of the wedding and visited. Most still called me by my maiden name though there were lots that had fun trying to remember my married name and use that. It was fun getting to share this part of my life even if it was in a very small way with my 3rd graders.
     
  21. seatonk

    seatonk New Member

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    Aug 9, 2008

    I teach first grade. I was engaged in February and married during Spring Break in March. I told my kids and they loved it. I told them my name would be changing after spring break, but they could call me either one. They did a great job remembering my new name....better than me most of the time. The kids always corrected anyone who called me by my old name. This year I will start out with my new name. I started last year by sending an end of the year letter home to all the new parents welcoming them. I would not be afraid to tell my class at all. Students love a little personal information on you. They like to hear what you had for dinner last night and how you took your dog for a walk.....at least first graders do.
     

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