I think I HATE teaching

Discussion in 'General Education' started by Daskalos, Feb 26, 2012.

  1. Daskalos

    Daskalos Rookie

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    Feb 26, 2012

    OK, I am a career changer and worked hard and excelled in my master's program. Got a job as a leave replacement teacher in a great school where I am friends with everyone in the department I work. I've known them for several years now--my best friend also works there. I got the job in November and it is now the end of Feb.
    My problem is: I don't think I like this at all. I can't wait for June to come. I am praying that the person I am sub-ing for decides they are OK to come back during the last quarter, which I know will not happen. I know this is the very beginning and I have all of 30 seconds of experience but I have no enthusiasm for this. I like to get positive feedback from students and my officemates but last week I was giving quizes to all my classes (all on one particular day -- which was a relief since I didn't have to teach) and while looking at one particular group I asked myself what I was I doing there. And, that if anything I could use my masters as a backup or just tutor on the side while persuing something else.
    I am extremely creative and while I am pretty good artist, I can't think of anything fun with these kids (high school). As I write this, I can honestly say that if I were offered a job next year I would not jump at it. I should be working on stuff for tomorrow and I am not. I hate not feeling anything (positive or negative) for this honorable profession. Sunday nights are very depressing for me.

    HELP!!!!!!
     
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  3. elateacher4life

    elateacher4life Cohort

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    Feb 26, 2012

    Perhaps it's not teaching, but you're overwhelmed by this particular job. Perhaps things would be different in your own classroom. Give it a little more time and see how you feel.
     
  4. ku_alum

    ku_alum Aficionado

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    Feb 26, 2012

    I'm sorry.

    I'm not sure I have any words of advice. But, I can tell you, teaching is VERY rewarding for most of us. So, if you're not finding the rewards, perhaps it is not the career for you.

    When my alarm goes off in the morning, I may briefly think, "ugh, here we go," but, by the time I walk into the building I'm "on" and ready to take on the day and ready to do everything I can to make it a great day of learning for my students.

    Is every day unicorns and tulips? No. But, I really cannot fathom doing any other thing with my life. When I say, "I LOVE my job," I really mean it.

    So, ... do some deep reflection. If the drive isn't there, it isn't there. Teaching is a field where you can't "fake it" ... students deserve more than that.
     
  5. TamiJ

    TamiJ Virtuoso

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    Feb 26, 2012

    Maybe it's the age, the school and the district. Those factors could be causing you to feel the way you do. Teaching, however, isn't for everyone, and perhaps that's what you are finding out. I'm not sure. It's a tough job, full of stress (most jobs are, though, aren't they), but many of us find it to be a fulfilling career. Other's don't. I think you need to really decide what your issues with it are, and then proceed from there. I didn't hate it my first year, but I was so overwhelmed that I didn't find a great love for it initially (although I didn't think I didn't love it...only looking back I can remember all my own self-doubt, exhaustion, worry, that I realize I was too occupied to actually love it). So, I agree with Ku_alum, you really need to reflect. Best of luck to you.
     
  6. GTB4GT

    GTB4GT Cohort

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    At the end of the day, there really is no field where a person can "fake it" and enjoy themselves. Not only do the students deserve better but you (the OP) do as well. Trust your judgement and move on if you don't like it....it's a hard life if you don't enjoy what you do for a living imo.
     
  7. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Feb 26, 2012

    I think that you are smart to recognize this just not what you want to do. Life is too short to be in a place where you are not happy. Plus, the kids deserve someone totally invested in their futures. The teacher does matter. If your heart is not there, find where your heart is. You deserve the best for YOU too.
     
  8. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    Feb 26, 2012

    I, too, had some issues with my first group of students. Luckily, my school required a month long experience at a public school. I hated it. The students did not want to learn. I was wasting my time.

    I went back to school and talked with my advisor. I was able to find an age group that wanted to learn, and I loved it. (I taught PS and adults, both groups wanted to learn.)
     
  9. sarah80

    sarah80 Rookie

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    Feb 26, 2012

    May be it's the age of students. I believe you teach in a high school. They can be tough sometimes but then it depends on the school and the district.

    A piece of advice: Don't give up you job.

    Good luck :)
     
  10. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Feb 26, 2012

    Hey, teaching's not for everyone. Out of curiosity, what was your previous career? I got a Masters in Special Ed some yrs ago & did that for just a yr & still switched fields, where I'm working on a 2nd Masters, but the 2 fields partner pretty well together. This time around, I'm a Speech-Language Pathologist (SLP) & I'm so glad I switched.
    I agree that high school is tough. I'd never want to work w/ that age. How about trying elementary level?

    Good luck in whatever you decide to do.
     
  11. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    Feb 26, 2012

    I'm soooooo incredibly sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. :(

    My advice would be to get through this school year and take another career path once school ends. Life is way too short to be in a profession that is making you miserable.

    The school year is almost over and I'm urging you to give the kids your very best--they deserve it.

    P.S. If for some reason you think you can't make it through the remaining months--resign and let someone else who really wants the job fill the position.
     
  12. Reality Check

    Reality Check Habitué

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    Feb 27, 2012

    If you're teaching in the city, or a district that borders the city, you're not alone! Generally, those students AREN'T going to give you positive feedback and it's not like teaching Archie, Betty, and the Riverdale High gang.

    You're not going to get much, if any, hand-raising, interest in the subject matter, cooperation from the home, or completed assignments.

    Trying to get into districts where you'll find even a percentage of students doing that is a very tall order in the metropolitan areas.

    If you can't shrug your shoulders and say to yourself, "It is what it is and they are what they are," you'd probably be better off looking in another direction once you get out.


    :|
     
  13. TeachOn

    TeachOn Habitué

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    Feb 27, 2012

    1) Teaching is a lot of work. I'm a high school English teacher: I work about 55 hours a week.

    2) If you don't enjoy being with the kids, you're losing a big chunk of the payoff in this work, and it's very unlikely on balance to be the job for you. Which brings me to:

    3) You have to find the right age group for you. Teaching elementary, for example, is a whole different job than teaching high school: a joy to some, anathema to others, and vice versa.

    4) Where you teach makes a huge difference. I teach in a well-off, academically oriented area. A number of my students thank me at the end of each class (some mean it, I think!). Almost all of them are easy to like and rewarding to teach. I feel a little guilty saying this, as if I might be encouraging you avoid the harder job of working in "areas of greater need," but it is the truth.
     
  14. Reality Check

    Reality Check Habitué

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    Feb 27, 2012

    Teachon - Great post. Right on the money. Especially some of your specific points in your #4.

    :thumb:
     
  15. orangetea

    orangetea Connoisseur

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    Feb 27, 2012

    What exactly about teaching do you dislike? If there's a lot you don't like about it, I would try to find another career path.
     
  16. callmebob

    callmebob Enthusiast

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    Feb 27, 2012

    If you can get another job that you would be happier doing, then go for it. It all depends on what you want out of your job. People do different jobs for different reasons. You have to look at the pros and cons, really examine what it is you want out of job and does teaching give that to you or not.
     
  17. Bear Knuckles

    Bear Knuckles Rookie

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    Mar 1, 2012

    I echo this sentiment.
     
  18. Daskalos

    Daskalos Rookie

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    Mar 7, 2012

    It is so weird guys. I love all your replies, I really do. I stress because no matter what I want my kids to learn from me. I reallly do. I do feel overwhelmed. I have three preps and no official mentor (while my officemates are always willing to help me and they do). Reflecting every single morning on my way in to work, I know I like the majority of my students but there is one class that I don't ever want to see after the year is over, EVER. Again, I want them all to learn from me. I wonder if student teaching, a true mentor, etc would/would have helped; and yes, I feel quite overwhelmed. My best friend, a teacher of 15 years says he sees the teacher in me but I do have doubts. I've become so emotional in private. I hate feeling like this because I really wanted to do this. I'll keep you all posted. And for the first time, last week I actually said to myself "Next year when I teach this I'll do it differently" I surprised myself...sometimes whispers are louder than anything obvious. Who knows. But we'll be in touch. I appreciate all or your input, guys. I really do!!
     
  19. Daskalos

    Daskalos Rookie

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    BTW, I work in a very high paying district in NYS, active admin and parents, good typical high school kids. They are inherently good kids, just typical for their age. I did, to toot my own horn, turn around a very troubled kid who was always being written up etc. I did mini interviews with them, found out what made him tick and he's become the greatest most respectful young man now (with me). He says hello to me in the hallways etc.
     
  20. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Mar 7, 2012

    What is it you teach?
     
  21. Daskalos

    Daskalos Rookie

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    Mar 11, 2012

    High School Spanish.
     
  22. creativemonster

    creativemonster Comrade

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    Mar 12, 2012

    first year teaching is TOUGH. (gets easier) This time of year with hs students also tough. Love that you have a friend who can point out what is working and help you reflect and it sounds like you care a LOT.
     
  23. Peregrin5

    Peregrin5 Maven

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    Mar 13, 2012

    I am having a tough time at my teaching position as well. I wake up every morning dreading coming to class. All I can do though is wait it out and hope things get better. I'm doing my best, but all I can hope for is that next year I don't get hired at the same school and I can try my dice somewhere else.
     
  24. mom2sands

    mom2sands Comrade

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    Mar 13, 2012

    My new mantra is: "Do what you love and love what you do!" I was fairly new at teaching and an "older" teacher. I returned to school to become a teacher, somtehing I thought I had always wanted to be. This year has taken a physical and emotional toll on me--to the point that I had to give it up! Too many demands and too much stress left me with nothing at the end of the day! My basic needs were not being met--not sleeping nor eating. No job should make you feel this way! I know this seems drastic to most, but I was no longer living. I was barely existing and I hope to be thriving soon!
     
  25. lovebeingteach

    lovebeingteach Companion

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    Mar 13, 2012

    It doesn't mean you are a bad person because you don't like it. You are one of many. My uncle started as a English Teacher, which he hated. He went back to college, eventually earned his Doctorate and now works for NASA.

    Teaching is not the kind of job you can do if you don't at least like it. Believe me, there are days that I feel like I can't do this another day, but then I see a glimmer of hope that gets me through....
     
  26. Daskalos

    Daskalos Rookie

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    Mar 15, 2013

    Not that it matters but here is an update. I finished the year and "faked" sadness for the end of the year. For three days during the year I remember saying to myself a bullet in my head would be better. Dramatic? Most probably. I didn't find a teaching job and stuck with my fallback job. I haven't finished getting my exams done for certification. I spent the whole summer rebelling against the subject I taught and avoided speaking Spanish to anyone. As a result I've lost my desire for other languages and can't seem to find the desire to learn other languages anymore. I was called back to do a several week stint and because of scheduling with my fallback job wasn't able to help them out but during the time I was considering it and trying to see if I could the flood of anxiety came rushing back. It sucks.
     
  27. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    I'm sorry you had a miserable experience but glad you have other options. :)
     

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