I feel like I'm in big trouble

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by lucybelle, Oct 22, 2013.

  1. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Oct 22, 2013

    I'll try to make this brief. There's a private German school up the road from me that has a swim team. I wanted to join but was told I couldn't since I have no connections to the school. Months later (about three weeks ago) I mention in passing to some parents from my school that I wanted to swim there but they wouldn't let me. The dad says he'll get me an ID to go swim because he coaches soccer at the school. I say sure. He gets me the ID. I write the swim coach at the school to see if I can now swim. Coach says "no". I say okay, did what I could right?

    Well the dad told me to call him today and I do and he says "what did you do?" I told him and he says I shouldn't have done that. I apologized. He then says it's not my fault and goes on this huge cursing rant about how much the school sucks (run by "Nazi a-holes" and yes that's a direct quote). He says the school is funded by the German government and therefore should be run like schools in Germany. Which means the facilities are open to the public to promote exercise (like in the USA). He says he plans to not only talk to the board of directors, but also the German embassy about the matter. I told him I didn't want to cause problems and he says no it's the principle of it. He basically yells at me (but not at "me", at the situation/school) for 15 minutes over the phone.

    I really don't want to cause problems for me, him, or anyone else at the school. And of course since he's a parent of my students it's also a bit awkward. I want to back away slowly. I wrote an email I plan on sending tomorrow. What do you guys think?? I want to diffuse the situation but I don't know that he can be talked down. Uggghhh. Thoughts, suggestions, HELP?????:help::help:

    Good morning Mr. -----,

    I hope you are doing well! I first of all want to thank you and your wife so much for trying to help me with the swimming! I was thinking about what we spoke about yesterday and while I understand why there is frustration and anger towards the school, I really worry about causing problems. I know why you want to stand up for this situation and I agree with that, but I since I am a visitor in this country I don't feel comfortable getting too involved. I apologize for causing such a mess and I hope I don't seem ungrateful for everything you've done to help.

    Thank you again,

    Mrs. ----
     
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  3. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

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    Oct 22, 2013

    What did the dad say you should have done?
     
  4. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Oct 22, 2013

    He said I shouldn't have said anything. There's times when the pool has open hours and he said I should have gone to those and just lied at the gate and said I was part of the German institute if they asked.

    I didn't know that, but also I wouldn't feel comfortable lying so I probably just wouldn't have gone at all.

    I just talked to my husband and he says I shouldn't write anything to the dad. That if he's crazy and wants to do crazy things then that's his problem, not mine. He says I shouldn't worry about it. Is that the right thing to do?
     
  5. Proud2BATeacher

    Proud2BATeacher Phenom

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    Oct 22, 2013

    I'm with you lucybelle. I think I'll feel more comfortable sending the email as documentation that you asked this guy to not to make a big deal about it -- just in case he says something that will result in you being called in.
     
  6. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Oct 22, 2013

    You didn't think anything would be questionable about the ID the dad got you? If the rules were you must be associated with the school to swim there, what did you think changed? The dad is associated with the school. You aren't. Let the dad rant if he wants. Stay out of it. Return the ID.
     
  7. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Oct 22, 2013

    Please do not lecture me.
     
  8. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Oct 22, 2013

    I'm not...just offering advice.

    If you truly felt the ID was on the up and up, you have nothing to be concerned about. Let the dad deal with his own issues.
     
  9. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Oct 22, 2013

    I would probably send it.

    As to getting the ID in the first place, assuming it's not some fake ID with false information, I know that a lot of times you just need a contact to gain access to or benefit from something. So I don't think it sounds really that "out there" to have the dad get you the card. I would have thought it was basically like he was vouching for you, you know?
     
  10. a2z

    a2z Virtuoso

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    Oct 23, 2013

    :yeahthat:
     
  11. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Oct 23, 2013

    Gosh so half the people I talked to said I need to send the email, and the other half say no. My esposo is adamant I don't send anything and let the dad find me if he wants to talk anymore.

    ugh. Lesson learned- never go anywhere beyond teacher/parent relationships with parents. Keep my freaking personal life to myself.
     
  12. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Oct 23, 2013

    I would not send the email.
     
  13. stephenpe

    stephenpe Connoisseur

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    Oct 23, 2013

    An international incident. All because you just want to swim in their $@*($% pool. Certainly, someone is being an equine posterior but it is not you. Me? I probably go to the head of that school and say "Hey, can I swim laps in your pool? I teach down the road and need the exercise. How about 10 dollars a month or something like I volunteer to help out in some way."
    btw I dont think you were taking advantage of anyone and I like that dad. I found Germany a great place. They seem to like tourists........
     
  14. stargirl

    stargirl Comrade

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    Oct 23, 2013

    I wouldn't worry about it. I doubt the dad will actually contact the embassy (people who rant and rave like that rarely follow through, I've found).
     
  15. Irishdave

    Irishdave Enthusiast

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    Oct 24, 2013

    I would not send the email. let sleeping dogs lie
     

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