I am so overwhelmed. This is my first year with my own classroom-I work in a school where there is no set program or curriculum. I create almost everything from scratch for 3 preps. I am working from about 5:30AM until 10:00 PM almost every night--I do take a few hours off in between to be with my children but even that time isn't quality time. All I can think about is how much work I have to do and when I can get back to working. I know all new teachers go through this but it feels especially stressful creating all lessons and materials from scratch. I do use the internet as much as possible but it never seems to meet my students' needs. The hardest part is grammar......the kids' skills are horrific(7th/8th) and I am having a hard time finding things to meet them where they are at that are interesting. Every lesson has to be created from nothing and I am not even sure if I can use it again next year because I have no idea if it will be successful or not. I feel like I am trudging up a huge mountain with no end in sight. I know I am lucky to have a job and I am nowhere near quitting (most of my students are wonderful but low, and I have an amazingly support admin and team)....but I also know I can't keep up this pace. I miss my kids, my relationship with my husband, and sleep! If you walk into my room it LOOKS like I have it all together but I am really doubting if my lessons are meaningful and building knowledge. I just feel like a big phony.