I Actually Cried at School Today...

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Iowa_Teacher, Oct 22, 2009.

  1. Iowa_Teacher

    Iowa_Teacher Rookie

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2007
    Messages:
    58
    Likes Received:
    0

    Oct 22, 2009

    For the first time in my 2 and a 1/4 years teaching, I sat in my principal's office and cried because of a student. I cried when a staff member died, but I have never cried because of a student! He was horrible! Never in my life has someone spoken to me that way and I hope no one ever does again. He told me that everything was better at the school before I got there and that I think I'm better than everyone as well as many more colorful things. I know I shouldn't listen and that it means nothing and it's not so much what he said that bothered me, but the way he must feel about me to actually SAY those things. Ugh!

    Feeling kind of low here in Iowa tonight :unsure:
     
  2.  
  3. TennisPlayer

    TennisPlayer Cohort

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2008
    Messages:
    518
    Likes Received:
    0

    Oct 22, 2009

    Oh, I'm sorry to hear that someone wasn't nice to you and how they didn't even think about how it'd make you feel (or care). Words do hurt but can also be uplifting. Did your principal understand why you were crying there?

    I know it hurts but try to focus on all of the "other" kids who do respect and are nice to you instead of dwelling on this one kid who doesn't know when to keep their comments to themselves.


    You know you're a good person and do the best you can. Some people hurt other people's feelings to try to bring themselves up, you know what I mean?

    Take care there and get a good night's sleep since it's getting late there in Iowa.
     
  4. Iowa_Teacher

    Iowa_Teacher Rookie

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2007
    Messages:
    58
    Likes Received:
    0

    Oct 22, 2009

    Yes and he's going to pull the student in tomorrow. I feel I should mention that this is a senior in high school...not like a 7 year old (although I'm SURE they can say many hurtful things as well!) He knew exactly what he was doing. Little stinker...
     
  5. yarnwoman

    yarnwoman Cohort

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2006
    Messages:
    693
    Likes Received:
    0

    Oct 22, 2009

    This was most of the boys in my class last year. I expected them to follow the rules and get work completed. My partner teacher allowed for their class to have game days, music days(they brought their instruments and jammed all day), they did mostly group activities. According to my boys, I was the worst teacher in the world, I ruined their year etc. I was in tears a lot of last year. This year I have seen several of these boys and they thank me for being strict with them. I hope you have the same outcome eventually.
     
  6. Blue

    Blue Aficionado

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2005
    Messages:
    3,591
    Likes Received:
    3

    Oct 22, 2009

    Have you read the book, "What Color is Your Parachute". One phrase from the book sticks with me, "You know you are doing your job when sxxx is in your face." So, you are doing a great job, and don't be ashamed for doing it. I am sorry it hurts so much.
     
  7. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

    Joined:
    May 13, 2004
    Messages:
    5,872
    Likes Received:
    158

    Oct 22, 2009

    :hugs: I'm sorry that student was so disrespectful. Kids today are so...it's hard to narrow it down to one word. Kids do things today I'd never even dream of doing when I was their age.
     
  8. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2006
    Messages:
    27,534
    Likes Received:
    6

    Oct 23, 2009

    I think that kids are the same as they've always been, and that this particular child is a brat.

    And if you've been teaching for 2 1/2 years, you know that kids are mercurial. What he feels deeply and says today is NOT necessarily what he felt yesterday or will feel tomorrow. (That's why they go through relationships as quickly as they do... undying love one day and "so over it" the next.)

    Yes, he's a disprespectful punk. And yes, you must have been doing your job to put some sort of barrier between him and whatever he wanted to do.

    Take a deep breath and go into that class CALMLY today. They'll be watching for your reaction-- know that they know what he said to you, regardless of who else was in the room at the time. Give him and them absolutely no satisfaction... pretend to them that it never happened or that you've forgotten all about it.

    And hang in there. For every disrespectful punk, there are lots and lots of kids who are learning and growing in your classes.
     
  9. ku_alum

    ku_alum Aficionado

    Joined:
    May 24, 2008
    Messages:
    3,513
    Likes Received:
    15

    Oct 23, 2009

    What Alice wrote.
     
  10. ku_alum

    ku_alum Aficionado

    Joined:
    May 24, 2008
    Messages:
    3,513
    Likes Received:
    15

    Oct 23, 2009

    Kids today are so ... funny, smart, thoughtful.
    Some kids are punks, some kids have crappy days.
    But kids today are just kids ...
     
  11. Mrs. K.

    Mrs. K. Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2008
    Messages:
    2,289
    Likes Received:
    120

    Oct 23, 2009

    I'm sorry that happened, but the truth is most high school kids are little narcissists who have no real experience of the world except what they get through the popular media (heaven help us!) He of course had no right to speak to you that way, but as everyone else has said, he doesn't speak for the rest of your students, who probably disagree strongly.

    In my experience, the boys (its always boys) who have been the biggest pains in the posterior are the ones who want to come back and visit me after they graduate. It's weird, but kind of encouraging. Hang in there!
     
  12. Major

    Major Connoisseur

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2005
    Messages:
    1,620
    Likes Received:
    5

    Oct 23, 2009

    Hopefully this disrespectful idiot will do better during his second "senior" year.
     
  13. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2005
    Messages:
    14,047
    Likes Received:
    1,864

    Oct 23, 2009

    Kids today are so....much fun!

    We all have days when we say things we wish we could take back and there are those kids who do cross the line of what is appropriate and what isn't, but that's the way it's always been.

    Iowa_Teacher--I'm sorry about your day, but glad that you had a supportive ear.
     
  14. Teacher_Lyn

    Teacher_Lyn Companion

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2008
    Messages:
    231
    Likes Received:
    2

    Oct 23, 2009

    :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:
    I understand your pain and I know we're a world apart and you don't know me from Adam, but please, you have my sympathy and you're not the first or last teacher to cry over a student.

    In fact, the crying is good because its an emotional release and though i''m sure it desn't feel like it, it's better you let those bad feelings out via tears, then hold them in.

    My boyfriend teaches 10th grade and his students are horrible to him. He's Caucasian and works at a rough, urban school where he's in the minority. Everyday, he gets called all sorts of derogatory* names and recieves twice the disrespect from students just because of his skin.

    On his first day, he told a 9th grade boy to get to class and the boy bucked at him, called him a C-----r and threatened to fight him.

    He doesn't cry, I guess because he's trying to be tough, but its really hard on him, and sometimes he'll put his head in my lap and just lay there with his arms around my waist because he's so frustrated and upset.

    Anyhow, I didn't mean to get on a tangent. You are not alone and if you need to cry/scream/lay your head in someone's lap/etc, do so.
     
  15. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Oct 23, 2009

    This sounds almost what my husband has to go through. He's a sub, but most days he'll come home and tell me what his students called him today or threw at him. I can't imagine having to deal with that on a daily basis.

    I know I've cried at school before. Several times. I know of other teachers who have cried too. THis is a very stressful career to be in and it doesn't help when students treat you this way.

    I'm sorry.
     
  16. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2006
    Messages:
    27,534
    Likes Received:
    6

    Oct 23, 2009

    Iowa, how did it go today?
     
  17. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2006
    Messages:
    27,534
    Likes Received:
    6

    Oct 23, 2009

    That is so funny!!!
     
  18. bonneb

    bonneb Fanatic

    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2006
    Messages:
    2,518
    Likes Received:
    9

    Oct 23, 2009

    Try to rise above this childish behavior. I know it is hard. He obviously is upset about something and is taking it out on you. If you can adopt the attitude "I know you hate me, but I still love you and will do what is right for you" you will be able to distance yourself from the personal remarks.

    Sorry this happened - I have gone through the same kind of things, and cried many a tear, on my way to developing as a teacher and being able to disconnect myself from their personal attacks. Great that your P is behind you!
     
  19. Iowa_Teacher

    Iowa_Teacher Rookie

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2007
    Messages:
    58
    Likes Received:
    0

    Oct 23, 2009

    I found out today that this boy had just gotten out of the office for something else, so he was most likely taking that out on me. Regardless, he was a little angel today. I didn't have to say a word to him about his behavior, which was lovely.

    On top of that, at the football game tonight I had one of my senior boys from last year give me a hug and tell me I was a much better English teacher than the one he currently has at college. I replied, "You have no idea how much I needed to hear that this week!" Ah, what a difference a day makes! :)
     
  20. SwOcean Gal

    SwOcean Gal Devotee

    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2004
    Messages:
    1,151
    Likes Received:
    0

    Oct 24, 2009

    Aw! That is great! How precious! You always need to remember the days like this one and treasure them!
     

Share This Page

Members Online Now

  1. detailking
Total: 315 (members: 2, guests: 290, robots: 23)
test